WTFH

This be likeguidelines, bringin' ye the final day of Oh Thank God They Be Leavin' Weekend.

As thar be quite the soiree over at Efferton Manor, most o' the broadcast be devoted to it. But first, a rundown o' the rest of the day.

Readin', Writin', Rithamatic
Belthazor be lookin' fer JA members t'introduce his parents to. He be findin' Beka in Professor Carter's classroom 'n be passin' her off as Phoebe.

Rory 'n Angela be runnin' into Lockheed, who be comin' out of Locker 327. Somethin' be wrong. They be takin' him to see Professor Dream.

Professor Maclay be holdin' office hours again. She be meetin' with Widow Twanky, Shawn Farrell, Parker's godfather Sydney, the Broots family and Trina Echolls, who she be mistaken fer someone else. Professor Slartibartfast also be holdin' office hours, where he be chattin' with Paige, Chewbacca, 'n *shuffles papers* some mice. I be not askin', folks, just reportin'. Professor Chaucer got to meet Paige's grandmother durin' his office hours, which I be assured be not excessively awkward. Professor Tick be meetin' Keith Mars durin' his open classroom. Heh. Keith be thinkin' the good professor be dressed up fer Halloween.

Krycek be settin' up the Journalism displays again. He be gettin' into an argument with Phoebe 'n Belthazor. Angela be stoppin' by with her mother 'n sister, 'n be introducin' them to Phoebe. Veronica 'n her dad also be stoppin' by.

Roomin'
Professor Maclay still be takin' care of all the students who be not havin' guests this weekend. Thar be pancakes 'n clay. Ye eat one and not the other, and if ye don't know which be which, I be not tellin' ye.

Marty be lookin' fer volunteers t'walk students home at night.

John Connor be hidin' in the woods before gettin' ready fer the ball. Nice costume, John.

Draco be talkin' t'his mother in the fireplace o' the common room. Really. And he thinks she be the one who be drinkin'. Evelyn 'n her brother be gettin' up t'mischief on campus.

Zero be back from her time in Locker 327. They be thinkin' she be a witch!

Non-Halloween-Ball Revelin'
Shane be chattin' with the other Doctor in the park. And the Tick be protectin' us all from the carnivorous ducks.

Rory 'n Logan-who-used-t'be-a-bunny be cute in her room before meetin' up with Angela 'n Marty'n their respective family members fer brunch. Veronica 'n her father be eatin' at Luke's. Marty be hidin' from Veronica like a woman.

Tex 'n Zhaan be workin' out a possible business deal, and Chloe 'n Lex Luthor be catchin' up on old times at the Perk.

Zhaan also be meetin' up with some familiar faces: Aeryn, who be not recognizin' her, and Chiana, who do.

Rodney 'n Jonas be goin' househuntin'. Miho be back in town. She be in a mood, too.

Crowley be askin' Aziraphale t'move into the hotel wit' him, Professor Tick be talkin' to Michael about superheroin' and Pez.

Han 'n Bagoas be buyin' costumes, and Anakin 'n Obi-Wan Kenobi be puttin' on their own outfits. And Crichton Gold Pants Boy be not terribly thrilled with Parker's choice for his costume. Allie'n-Logan-who-never-be-a-bunny be adorable in their outfits, too.

Halloween Revelin'
At the ball, Wednesday be gettin' a lecture from her mother about the importance o' not bein' punctual. She also be introducin' Thomasina t'her mother.

Thar be all manner o' mixin' 'n minglin' on the first floor.

Shane be flirtin' with Kate 'n chattin' with Jay 'n Silent Bob. Professor Chaucer (who be workin' a mighty fine lookin' cloak) be talkin' with Professor Cregg be talkin' about a commission Professor Chaucer be workin' on fer her. They also be talkin' about Professor Chaucer's run-in with Paige's grandmother earlier today. Then Becky -- who be in color -- be chattin' with him, and so be Anakin 'n Professor Amidala.

Professor Tick Nazareth, on the search fer spoons, be makin' quite the impression at the party. Especially with Professor Cregg 'n Chaucer, He also be runnin' into Dean Bristow, who be lookin' slightly familiar.

Michael 'n Bagoas, both in drag, be admirin' each other's outfits 'n commentin' on the strange chill in the house. Chiana 'n Maia be dancin' and other things, and head upstairs t'discover that it be not a good idea t'make out on the second floor.

Rogue's Logan, who as far I as know has never been a bunny, be bringin' her drinks. Then they be gettin' spooked by a ghost in the graveyard, defeat the creepin' vines, and celebrate with a kiss. The things that be watchin' be, apparently, makin' popcorn. Callisto also be gettin' possessed by a mopey ghost in the graveyard.

Callynanders be stoppin' fer a quick nibble (yes, like that. And also like that) before goin' into the conservatory t'get attacked by evil plants with Lee 'n Kara. Faith 'n Silent Bob also be meetin' up with an angry plant, after meetin' up at the judges' table when Faith was finished oglin' the Jedi in the leather pants.

Chihaya be quite a fan o' the comic book character Ben be dressed as. Ben 'n Michael be takin' a turn on the dance floor, too.

Inara be discussin' the pros 'n cons of heels with Michael before dancin' with Cousin Itt, Chewbacca, 'n a pirate who be findin' a very snazzy new hat fer the occasion.

Paige 'n Sawyer be snuggly in the ballroom, makin' out on the veranda, havin' some difficulties gettin' alcohol thanks t' an intervention from Lurch, Then they be gettin' disturbed by gigglin' cherubs, 'n scared by the ghost in the library before Paige be orbin' them away. Paige also be findin' time t'talk to Jonathan. And I'd thank ye not t'be insultin' the integrity o' this broadcast. And yes, we be hearin' that. We be hearin' everything.

Quinn be totally irritatin' Professor Camulus, who be fleein' to the safety of the veranda 'n runnin' into Callisto, who be escapin' from some touchy-feely plant life. Quinn be wanderin' into the cellar, where she be teachin' the scorpions t'sing Britney Spears.

Chloe be dancin' with Han before meetin' up with some spirits in the cellar. Kate 'n Shane be speakin' with Michael (who be quite fetchin' in drag), 'n gettin' checked out by Silent Bob, before chattin' with Duo 'n the Doctor in the dinin' room. They then be joinin' Professor Maclay fer a close encounter o' the second floor variety.

Professor Cregg be findin' the Doctor's dancin' t'be quite stimulatin', and talkin' to Deb about havin' what ye want. The Doctor also be dancin' with Senator Amidala 'n then havin' a chat with Dean Bristow, the Tick. After that, he be drinkin' up with Professor Chaucer.

Connor be dancin' with Murphy before they be headin' out t'the veranda together.

Anakin 'n Chloe be snarkin' on Gold Pants Boy's choice o' attire. He be talkin' with Callisto about their costumes 'n Widow Twanky, chattin' with Vala 'n Cam, Cam 'n Gold Pants Boy be scarin' Number 6 with their identicalness. Join the club. He also be confused by duelin' Ticks. He be not thinkin' any o'this be real, and ends up kissin' Wednesday 'n facin' down the dreaded Number 2.

At the judges' table Chihaya, Mike, Ben, Deb, 'n Red make small talk, Professor Tick Nazareth be talkin' to Mr. Addams, then to Jaye about Parents' Weekend. Red 'n Silent Bob be sharin' a snack.

The creepy lounge be visited by Professor Eppes 'n Ivanova, Chihaya 'n Ben, and Sawyer 'n Paige. Ivanova 'n Professor Eppes also be encounterin' a ghost in the library. Professor Maclay 'n Crowley be talkin' about temptation before bein' joined by Michael.

Professor Cregg be chattin' with Han 'n Bagoas out on the veranda, and Lisa be talkin' with Doctors Wilson 'n House, who also be on the veranda.

Out in the grounds, Professor Maclay be gettin' tempted by Crowley before Aziraphale be showin' up and kissin' him. Lisa be almost pulled into the pond by a vine. Fortunately Jonathan be thar t'save her. Professor Eppes be gettin' possessed by a ghost puppy. Ivanova be thar t'witness it. Han 'n Bagoas be swingin' on a swing together before headin' into the house t'make out and get busted by Lurch because the grounds be kinda spooky.

At the top o' the house, Cam 'n Vala, and Aeryn 'n Gold Pants Boy be explorin' a Box Room. The mirror be makin' Cam's eyes glow red, which be creepy, and then Vala 'n Cam be gettin' shocked, which be more creepy. Then Vala be feelin' like she be stuck t' the floor, which be entirely enough creepy fer that room, so they be movin' on. They be tryin' a door which takes them to a Scorpion Pit. The pit be then leadin' to a dungeon (which always be a cheerful place t'find yerself). The floor then be droppin' out from under them, takin' them to the crypt to meet up with Susan 'n Jack Harkness, who be findin' themselves down thar after comin' through a tunnel. They all be sittin' down fer tea. And Cam be turnin' blue. That can't be good. They finally be endin' up in the garden.

On the second floor, Aeryn 'n Gold Pants Boy be discoverin' it be not a good idea t'try t'make out in the bedrooms. Allie 'n Logan-who-never-be-a-bunny be wanderin' around the den before bein' attacked by explodin' pillows 'n goin' home. Professor Vandekamp be gettin' into an argument with a paintin' in the master bedroom and John Connor be certainly not seein' a movin' dead deer. No sir.

Anakin 'n Obi-Wan Kenobi be havin' temperature issues in one room before gettin' a creepy shadow play in another. Anything strange enough t'be scarin' a Jedi? I be afraid of meself. And Bagoas be gettin' hypnotized by wallpaper. This be far from the weirdest thing that happened t'night. The strangely appearin' Halloween candy fer Duo 'n Hamlet be kinda odd, too, though.

Logan-who-used-t'be-a-bunny, Becky, Angelus 'n Darla be locked in a room together. Where Logan now be thinkin' he be a vampire. I think the correct term fer this be "identity crisis."

Today was also a day fer farewells. The two Doctors be sayin' goodbye t'each other. As are Parker 'n her godfather, and Anakin 'n Obi-Wan Kenobi. It be so sad. Why must goodbyes be so sad? I don't know. It be a mystery.

And I sure thar be other things that happened at the party and throughout the day, but they be not on me desk. That be all from the Crow's Nest. Keep an eye out fer the Rover--who be dressed as a pumpkin--and have a good night!

[OOC: *collapses*]

This be likeguidelines bringin' ye the highlights of this, the first day o' Bring Yer Parole Officer t'School Weekend.

Readin', Writin, 'Rithamatic.
Dean Bristow be announcin' that the last day t'be addin' or droppin' a class be November 1.

Students be talkin' about the bulbs they be plantin' last week in Cultivation 'n Gardenin', be learnin' about matin' rituals 'n marriage in Anthropology, and be turnin' in papers and discussin', huh, physics in Physics.

Linguistics class be cancelled, although the students need t'be comin' up with a classical love poem. Lifestyles also be learnin' about love.

Professor Maclay be holdin' office hours.

The Friday Ethics class be finishin' their slavery projects, Speech classes be watchin' Independence Day, and World History be cancelled fer the day.

Math classes be playin' wit' food. And Professor Eppes be announcin' that Broots be his new TA. Physical Geography be learnin' about cartography, and Diplomacy class be workin' on some roleplayin'.

Martial Arts be watchin' movies, Fashion be comin' up with costumes t'make their partners dress like they aren't, and Celtic Literature 'n Civilization be turnin' in their assignments.

The library be closed fer the weekend. Lee, Anders, Kawalsky, and the Doctor be stoppin' in to find out why.

Journalism classes be cancelled, but students be reminded t' put up their campaigns fer Parents' Weekend. Which they have. They be encouragin' ye to say yes t'needles, sex, vampires, 'n smokin'.

In Study Hall, Principal Connor be bribin' the students wit' real food, TV 'n pool tables. Rogue be talkin' to Cam, Bridge 'n Anders about ethics, pizza, and girls who hit people. Piper 'n Beka be chattin', Hank 'n Han be bondin' over pool, and Krycek be assurin' Rory 'n Logan-who-used-t'be-a-bunny that the candy fangs won't be doin' anythin' unnatural t'them. Callisto be lookin' different. This be concernin' Duce 'n Beka.

Roomin'
Cam be camped out in front of Vala's room. I be not sure if that be sweet or creepy. Since she be runnin' away seein' him in study hall, I be goin' with "not effective," regardless.

The gremlins be doin' a spot o' redecoratin' on the roof. Marty be leadin' a fearless gang up thar t'clean it off. And t'play gremlin baseball. As ye do.

Lana be talkin' t'Paige about Paige's no-good-very-bad last week, then be rememberin't that she be supposed t'be checkin' on Archie when Maia reminds her. That be confusin'. They be takin' her t'the clinic t'have it checked out.

Three quarters o' the world be gettin' flowers in the dorms today. In other news that be not news, Callynanders be cute in the common room.

Paige be recruitin' fer photographers fer the new modelin' company.

Professor Tick be sportin' a mighty fine hat (it be edible? What's not t'love?) and talkin' with Callisto 'n Major K!.

Shep be mopin' in the his room about Parents' Weekend. Beka be showin' up to cheer him.

And someone *cough*John Connor*cough* be leavin' a karaoke machine unattended in the third floor common room. Thar be people takin' advantage of it.

Revelin'
In extracurriculars, Wrestlin' Club be cancelled this week.

Allison be gettin' flowers, and chattin' with Aziraphale.

Paige, Lilly 'n Sawyer be signin' up t'model at the new agency, and Inara be doin' tai-chi in the park and chattin' with Ben, Michael 'n Gabrielle. Shane be meetin' the harpy at the bank. An actual harpy. Really.

Shane 'n Chloe be workin' on their Ethics project at Deb's. This be provin' to be a problem fer Anakin, who be at Deb's with his mentor-type person. He be stalkin' off t'have a temper tantrum in the park, and his Master be havin' no choice but t'drop him into the pond. I be likin' his Master's style.

Detectives Logan 'n Briscoe be back in town. They be already likin' our new mayor more than the one currently runnin' New York.

Becky 'n Professor Chaucer be havin' a movie date tonight. I be gettin' reliable reports tellin' me that it be adorable.

Michael 'n Shane be talkin' about Halloween 'n relationships, Lilah be gettin' visited by Aziraphale, and preparin' fer Darla, her new legal intern. And Darla be makin' friends with Doctor Wilson.

Hickory, Dickory 'n Dock Kadaj, Loz 'n Yazoo be seen headin' into Bloody Gulch Arms, and every adult wit' proof o' bein' old enough seems t'be in Spike's Pub tonight talkin' to Professor Chaucer about the jukebox.

In the file o' "wow, did I not need to be knowin' that", we put the fact that The Cat be havin' six nipples. Anya can confirm it.

Rogue be showin' Luke's Diner off another Logan--this one her guest fer Parents' Weekend. She be introducin' him to Beka 'n Shep. Anya 'n her good God, what be that? guardian-type also be stoppin' in fer dinner.

Wonka's be hoppin' today. Could have somethin' t'do with Wonka's rather unusual advertisin' practices. Cats? Really? Regardless, Cally 'n Anakin both be stoppin' in t'pick up gifts, and Krycek be lookin' fer an interview.

Aziraphale 'n Crowley be goin' fer a drive, and Han 'n Bagoas be makin' up, then Bagoas be movin' in with Han.

Yer Every Nightmare Be Comin' True: Parents' Weekend Begins
Marty, Alanna 'n Rover be workin' the Parents' Weekend check-in. Where the Dean be meetin' up with Irina, Sark's guardian. Thar be no kinds of sexual tension between them. Jes makin' that clear. Then Sark 'n Irina be goin' fer dinner.

Alanna 'n her Jon be meetin' up with Lisa Cuddy, Maia 'n her friend Shawn be catchin' up, Angela be bickerin' with her sister 'n gettin' some bad news from her mom. And Marty 'n Angela be makin' up! That make me little pirate heart so happy.

Crichton 'n his father be reunitin' before Aeryn be meetin' Crichton's dad.

Rory 'n her grandmother and Anya 'n her...guardian be exchangin' pleasantries. Duo's visitor Heero be meetin' Duo's roommate Hamlet, then they all be goin' t' dinner at Deb's.

Professor Maclay be holdin' a party fer everyone who be not havin' families, be not talkin' t'their families, or be not havin' anyone visitin' this weekend. She be cookin' 'n chattin' with a whole bunch o' students who be stoppin' by.

Logan-who-used-t'be-a-bunny's weekend be not gettin' off t'the greatest start. He be magneted to a wall, and then to Number 6. The Doctor (not our Doctor. A different Doctor. I be not understandin' either) be stoppin' to mock, and then t'help. And then Logan's sister Trina be comin' along to be mean and t'be introduced to Rory.

Kara be spendin' some time with Lee's father, who also be hittin' it off quite nicely wit' Callisto's guardian. Lana 'n her old business partner Lex be reunitin'. I be told the term t'describe him be "sexy bitch."

Duce be explainin' Oz t'her father, Anakin be not at all thrilled to death that his Master be comin' into town, and Angelus be meetin' up with his mother/lover person in way that be not strictly, well, normal.

The hotel in town be openin' (although Michel be not all that happy about how it be openin'). Jaye 'n her sister be havin' some trouble wit' their reservation, and Darla be not that happy wit' her accomodations, either.

And that be all from the Crow's Nest. Keep an eye out fer the Rover, don't kill yerself or anyone related t'ye, and have a good night!

[OOC: Apologies in advance for anyone we've missed. And thank you, thank you, thank you to the Pirate Researchers for helping tonight and for all of you OCD types for handing us easy-to-follow links]