WTFH

This is Faith Lehane, bringing you the news from Fandom High for the final time. An...and I don't think I mentioned this, but B? Excellent choice in rum. Excellent.

Classes (for you dumb people who've actually been showing up)

The Tick (who I still do not know the name of- is it The? I would like to know, damnit!), has superheroes come to his class. Blah blah, Literature, blah blah, boring, blah blah hot teacher. Oh, yay- Shop Class gets festive. Oh, Bio has a study guide. And I don't care.

Dream tells his classes he needs a TA and also that finals are due soon. They make adorable Snowman Lanterns in Home Ec. There's an open Sociology lab, for those that need it. Ew, finals stuff in the King Arthur class.

Art Class is full of sexual harassment, as usual. Dude, someone fire Ash already? Another 'ew'- Geography finals. Kry teaches Journalism.

Speech is boring, as usual. Ew, Ab.Psycho. I cut that shit. And, oh, shock- History classes learn nothing, again. Oh, but in Intro to Buisness they watch a movie. Yay for slacking.

Chaucer has office hours. Yum. The Doctor does also. Another yum.

Anakin? I'm personally offended that Flight Club got to watch a movie that you've yet to share with me. You know how I feel about Snakes In Planes.

The Library is open. Not that I care, or anything, because I'm not one of the chosen cool kids that hang out there, but whatever. Whorey Gilmore has a hangover, we're getting a new librarian, Lee is full of glee (which I've been told needs a LEE to exist), Chrichton talks to Marty about the theft of Angel's gay snowglobe, and Whorey's moody.

In Study Hall, Xander wears some misteltoe but doesn't get any. GLee and Draco chat. Oh, and that SLUT Veronica Mars drags Bel out into the hallway. Because she's a whore. Oh, and she brings him into the girl's bathroom. And he looks DAMN satisfied when leaving.

Dorms (or, where Veronica Mars SHOULD drag her conquests)

There are Secret Santa presents! Also in the holiday spirit, there's fliers for a holiday thing at Azriphale's. And also for caroling. And not in the holiday season, tomorrow is Open Mic Night. Maybe I'll do another Limerick. Or a dance. If I'm drunk enough.

Shep and Lana are cute in the common room. So cute, in fact, that I won't threaten to throw Lana at anyone tonight. Damn, I need another emoweapon. Oh gawd, and I'd need a weapon, just to beat the stupid off- Duo and Hamlet are fighting the war on cooties, from their pillow fort. Oh, and they watched Bitterwoman in the lounge. Missing that'll teach me to start drinking so early in the evening.

Also in the personal lives of FH students, we have Veronica Mars coming to the realization that she was skeezy last night. She apologizes to Pheobe for being a skank with her boyfriend. Also, she apologizes to Angela, even though she didn't get skanky with Marty. *yawn* She apologizes to Parker and Angel too. And, also, she apologizes to Rory for being a big skanky whore all in her boyfriend's lap. Summary- VMars is a ho.
Omigosh! Whorey spent the night in Annie's bed! And Logan isn't happy! *sigh* Well, they all don't kill each other. But she's still Whorey, for corrupting my poor, innocent, friend like that.

In another drama-filled event, Kara gets injured in a hardcore game of Stonehenge. Good going, Anders. Cally runs to get Lee, who is no longer so damn gleeful (but the Glee is still leeful), and Anders brings her to the Clinic. I don't know what went on in there, but I'll be damned if it doesn't seem like the poor girl got her ACL fucked up. Shit. *sounds of drinking, like out of a bottle of rum* Ya'll should send the poor girl flowers. Or cards. Or something.

Town

At Azriphale's, Harry Potter and Kiki are cute. *gasp* Oh, I am shocked. (By the way, Azzie is having a holiday party Saturday) And, aw, he got a Secret Santa!

There's a cute new guy working at the Emporium. Also, there was a bird there. And they talked to it. *sigh* I think I'm drunk. Also, it looks like Marty is planning a romantic night. He also mentioned Bel. *giggle* Please don't put those images in my head. Although, boys, I'm interested to see who's on top. Feel free to share.

*gulp* Um, remember how I asked for Ash's firing? Yeah, I take it back. Apparently, he's been, um, shot into space, along with Mr. Servo. *sniffle* He can't be GONE! I never got to give him any sugar! It was going to be a goodbye present! *sniffle*
*pause* Give me a moment. I need to get over the fact that I just told the school that I'd give Ash sugar. *sigh* Thank god I'm leaving soon.

Caritas is hopping less so than usual. CJ and the Tenster (also- is THAT his name?) talk about Harkness and his memory issues. Pheobe tries to get Bel to sing, and, aw, they do.

The Tick brings his...interesting friends to Luke's. And they meet Becky. And the whole thing is awkward, and disturbing, and I need more rum.

And that's all for today, folks. You're all fab, except for those of you that I hate. Also, B? We're gonna hang out and drink one night. Cause this drinking alone thing you're encouraging leads to badness.

*barks in the background* Yep, I'll tell them. Everyone? Wilkins loves you. And he wants to know if Vladdie's- no. I'm not setting you up. *ruff!* No! Relationships with vamps lead to badness! *arf!* No! Ask Buffy, if you don't belive me!

*click*


((ooc: *sobs* i don't wanna leave radio!))

This is Faith Le- um. St Cla- um. This is Faith, and being married is confusing. Here's the news for today.

Bulliten: Cameron is a puppy. Or a wolf. Whatever, it's cute. Also, um, Vala seems concerned. Which I understand. I mean, that'd totally put a cramp in your sex life.

Class

Shop Class builds human powered vehicles, cool. They talk about Quilting Myths in Home Ec, which- why are there myths about quilting? Who has that much free time? They all talk about how much Gladiator sucked in History, which- WHAT? Dude, there were swordfights! And gladiators! And people talking funny!

In Journalism, they get to read bunny comics. Apparently, this bunny is a stealth pirate ninja who can read minds and wield cheesegraters. Maybe he knows Barbossa? Speaking of, he and everyone else paint scary pictures in Art Studio. Also, um, Professor Ash? Cosmo is, um, a lady magazine. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but, you know, the Sexy Men issue probably isn't what you're into.

Languages is boring, Biology is boring (but with glitter and talk of body shots). Sociology is Yawn-ology (unless you're a geekheadloserface). And, dear GAWD, who cares about Archaeology? They're all dead and gone, kids.

Lit Class talks about love, or some bullshit like that. Rory Gilmore's teaching Criminal Justice. Also, I hear she's a slut. Maybe she has cooties, which, interestingly enough, is one of the topics in Speech Class.

We do stuff in Abnormal Psych, which is... new and exciting, I guess. They have a work period in Authurian Traditions, and it looks like there was some drama. Um, people go to Linguistics.

Professor Eppes, The Doctor and Professor Chaucer (who gets coffe and ROVER, OMG) all have office hours.

Study Hall is bouncing. Lots of people play with a dog, that happens to be Cameron. Really, ya'll gotta stop turning into animals. S'not healthy.
Also, John explains Kris'mus and Hanika to Anakin. Lee and John discuss their plans to go to Caritas.

Look, lots happens in the Library today. I don't care, and neither should you. (and the links wouldn't work.)

There are lots of club meetings tonight. Into the Black is hopping, with people signing up to fly and getting distracted by a puppy. In Yearbook, Whorey Gilmore delegates. And at Junior Acheivers, I get elected new club president. Which is clearly cause I'm the most achievingest of all.

Oh, and the Clinic is pretty dead. No one died, or anything, but no one got hurt, so deadness.

Dorms

There's a poster telling everyone with cats to be careful, as someone is a rodent. *snickering* Shep is putting out bait for said rodenty student- Beka, for the uninformed- but all he catches is Lana.

Aw, Anakin gives Whorey Gilmore a present. In his room. Alone. *bow-chicka-wowow music plays*

In the world of emo, we have Draco and Lilly being kinda cute. And we have Maia and Chianna, who, I don't know, fight or something.

On the DRAMA! front, Paige is angry. Remind me not to dump her. Actually, Sawyer's angry too, remind me never to trash his room. Also dramatic was the fight between Bel and Phoebe. I think I heard Angel or something being mentioned a lot.

Marty watches Gelmoore Gals reruns in the common room, and talks to Angela and Alanna. And um, did anyone else think the dorms were kinda filled with dread? It was unsettling.


Town

Um. Yeah. There's a Cat thing whoring. Or something. *sigh* I don't wanna touch this. I'll offend someone.

Mayor Red and Wilson work on plans for a Town Clinic. Nifty. I think there's some scary guy that shows up too, but I don't have the notes on it.

In the Park, House watches Yakko, Wakko, and Dot read, and he also meets Ben.

The Fourth Sin is getting busy. There's a decorating phone call, about what color carpeting is best. I'd go for, you know, um, natural-looking rugs, myself. Not a fan of blue. Also, Parker stops by to talk to Jarod, meet Becky (who looks like Whorey Gilmore), and get glared at by a doughnut eating Miho. And also, Geoff and Becky? Kinda cute.

Lana stops by Deb's (and Jonathan gets the JA brownies, YAY!), Aaron goes to see Sophia at Beethoven's shop, and The Tick talks to Druscilla. Oh, and ew! Grissom and Sidle go on a date, which I bet got OMG, DIRTY.

Oh, the BEST DINNER PARTY EVER was held tonight. There's some super cuteness. And "Faith Has Three Mommies" will soon be a bestseller. I go, cause I'm cool, and Deb and Carl come, cause they're cool and she's so sweet that she brought cookies, and Whorey Gilmore and Logan show up. Hell, even the cooking is cute. And Tara's the best cook ever.

Caritas is so insanely busy. Lee doesn't order a virgin, and is sad to hear that he has to be 21 to drink. Oh sweetie, we call it pregaming here. Gimme a call, I'll teach you. Lee and that SLUT Veronica Mars have an awkward conversation, because it's hard to talk to someone like her. Weird is damn chatty. Callisto gets mocked for her naked exploits this weekend.
Veronica Mars chats up Angel. Good luck, sweetie. When he's souled, he's like, a eunuch but less fun. John and Angel seem to have bonded. I smell a sitcom. Angel and Callisto kinda flirt. Seems awkward.
Lee and Aeryn talk, and I'm told it's confusing. Apparently, they'd get along fine, if they weren't into the same guy, which- what? Someone explain this to me.
Paige doesn't get booze. CJ is emo, and Vala shows off her pet Cam.
Veronica is a song pushing whore. And, aw, Allie and Logan are cute, and get each other to sing.
Oh, and there's singing. This being a kareoke bar.


Annnnd that's all for tonight. Jaye's got you tomorrow, and I'll see you all next week. Also, tomorrow morning, but still.


(This recap brought to you by the fact that THE INTERNET DIED WHEN I WAS HALF DONE AT THREE FIFTY NINE AM! AND I'M DONE AT FIVE TWENTY FOUR AND I HATE THE INTERNETS OMGOMGOMG!!!!. Okay, better now.)

This is Faith, bringing you the Fandom News for Tuesday, November 15. *Ruf!* *sigh* Wilkins is leaving shortly, as he is being bribed with treats. Don't judge my parenting, it's been a long day. And also? Barbossa needs to stop going on benders. "I been a pirate parrot"- I don't care! No more rum! Argh! *sounds of flailing*

Why, you ask? Well, in case you're deaf, blind, or fucking stupid, Sheriff Don "Yes, I am as dumb as you'd think" Lamb announced that Angelus allegedly is guilty of the murder of Katherine Pryde. This, of course, disregarding the friendly relationship between the two, the fact that he was quite upset at her death, and the general lack of a motive. Of course, I hear that accusing, and, heck, convicting the wrong man isn't exactly a rarity for this Sheriff. Go ahead, look it up, kids. I dare you.

Classes
(or, who gives a flying fuck)

Dean Bristow, The Doctor and Chaucer hold office hours. Oh, look! Paige is whining again.

Linguistics gets a midterm assignment, as does Greco-Roman Archaeology. Biology has a quiz, and The Tick gives out grades and announces a quiz.

More boringness follows. Journalism is cancelled, Intro to Western Lit is boring, Speech is too, Language Classes make me want to pokme my eyes out with a spoon, Human Geography's summary made me take a nap, and Buisness whatever is much the same.

Finally, something I can laugh at. Shop Class has to make a battery operated machine that makes life easier. I can think of several that'll make life happier. Oh, and Ash has pretty much lost it. He's in a tent, with a Snakes in a Plane flag. I'm a little bit concerned.

Ten shows up at the Library, looking for a book and the Librarian. Who happens to be missing.

There's a Fight Club Meeting, and there's playing in the sim and talk that I don't understand.

The Clinic is hopping today. Jonathan and Wilson chat about stuff I don't care about, Lizzie Weird wants to go on the pill, Proff. Cregg apparently thinks she has internal injuries, and Beka is allegedly 'rude'.

Dorms

There is jogging, early. So early, I don't care. People wake up, also. Xander and Anya are not surprised about Lamb's announcement. Beka is. Also, I think she's feeling emo.

Posters around the dorms are bringing to light various shortcomings of Veronica Mars's past investigations. I have it on good authority that she once accused- INCORRECTLY- her own boyfriend. Wow, what a bitch. Oh, and look! She pulls him into the bathroom! Maybe sex makes it all better? Whore.

Me and Anakin work out in the gym, and Shep, Lana, and Wesley exercize their minds in the common room.

Nobody wants an escort. Jack is moving to the TARDIS, so Six and Wednesday can, um 'play scrabble', and by that I mean make out in their own damn room, not the common room, okay, thanks? Carter brings in a bunny hutch for Parker's rabbit. And, um, Proff. Cregg is apparently keeping Harkness for her very own. Touching.

Logan and Callisto meet in the common room. They then break into Angelus's room, apparently searching for pictures. Cause, yeah, that's a freaking bright idea. But I like you two crazy kids, so it's okay. Except for the fact that there was totally gropage, and I think that a Xander Harris has photos.

Oh, and there's a lot of chatting about the whole dramamessthingthatsucks. Draco and Lilly, Angela and Marty, Rory and Angela (who have a HUGE fight), me and Anakin, Bel and Pheobe, and Veronica and Marty.

In the emo section, we have John, Lee, and Aeryn emoing. Yay for them.


Town

There's going to be a Harvest Festival. Apparently it involves costumes of some sort. *snort* Yeah, have fun with that.

At the Perk, Tara talks to Han about coffee, spaceships, and freakouts. Tara and Inarra talk about challenging people's perceptions. And also tea. Oh, and Paige talks to her as well. They discuss what happened to make Paige an evil slut, and how to prevent this from happening in the future. So, now, she can just be a regular, non-magical slut.

Red holds office hours, and Tex comes to see him. Loz Or Yazoo, since I can't tell the blondes apart, hits on Mike, who turns him down.

Parker's book shopping and nosy. Anya is also looking for books. *pause* I'm sorry, why does anyone care?

At Wonka's, Shane is buying apology candy, and Barbossa is buying candy (to share with me?) and making sure the parrot thing isn't permanent. Also, he's decided that Jack is an excellent name for a monkey. If anyone gets him a monkey, I may have to hide.

I've been told that Deb's was closed today because Paige sucks, but I didn't see any evidence of that, and besides, why would Deb care about Paige's sex life? I'm a confused recapper, folks.

Shane is apologizing to Aaron. She's also talking to Geoff about all of the flying angst around here.

Maia goes to the museum. Whatever. Oh, and Allison is sick. Must be the dread emocoma.

In the park, Aalaya explains the Force to Inara. Yeah, I don't much care about it, beyond Anakin's shiny glowstick thing. Later, Inara gives one of her buisness cards to Aaron.

Jarod is doing work-stuff on the computer in the Fourth Sin. I don't know, maybe it's interesting to some of you?

At Caritas, Becky meets Rory. It's funny, because they look the same, but they're totally different.

Alright, and that'd be all for tonight. Remember- don't be fucking quick to judge. Also? Barbossa is not allowed near rum ever again.

This is Faith and Wilkins, bringing you Wednesday's news. *arf!* Yes, most of it is just gossip. Really, this whole co-hosting thing? Much better idea when you weren't so damn talkative. *rrrrow* ....I'm not translating that.

Classes

Language Classes have a free period. Professor Dream is down. Speech is also a free period, and Professor Cregg talks to the class about Kitty Pryde.

Geology learns about "crustal deformation". *arrr-ruf* You're right, WIlkins. That girl probably does have that STD. In other 'OMG, dirty!' school news, Art Class has to paint something without using their hands. They all get green ducks, which I'm sure is some sort of very interesting sign of some sort of portent of doom that I don't much care about. Oh, and they've all got a take-home STD test.

Sociology classes are mocking the Darwin Award winners and talking about positive deviance. Anthropology is looking at old forms of marriage, and Celtic class looks at a map of Ireland. Oh, and apparently, Professor Jerusalem held class in his apartment today, if a certain Xander Harris is to be believed.

And in the "Crap, it'd suck so bad to be there" news, Professor Ten goes BATSHIT INSANE in Quantum Physics. Ass. Poetry Class discusses the evilest of poems, the haiku. Also, students who expected to be greeted by the amazing and damn sexy Professor Eppes were in for an unpleasant and mathy surprise. Math alone is bad enough, but it's bearable when you've got something pretty to stare at.

In Study Hall, the puppies are back. *arfity!* No, sweetie, you're much cooler. And yes, even adorable. Draco who is totally getting huge hips and Harry are together with a puppy. I've been assured that this is the setup of a bad porn. I'd like a copy, kids.

Phoebe plays with a puppy and Bel who totally isn't her puppy. Paige multitasks, playing with a puppy and talking to Sonia- and telling her that Ludwig liiiiiiiikes her. Johnny also multitasks, talking to Paige about a booty call and talking to Duce about the JA fashion show. Sweetie, follow her advice. You'll look awesome.

Also, Beka and Piper chat, and Beka and Lily (the one who didn't fuck her boyfriend's dad and get killed for it) meet for the first time. And, Duce, being the sweet and fashionable woman of my dreams, teaches Duo to remove glitter. I'm not going to ask for the details of that.

The AV Club has an open mic night. Go, sing, be emo. The less cool slayer and Bel work out in the gym.

Dean Bristow and Professor The Tick hold office hours. Mr. The Tick's are on the roof, for some reason. Also, there's a lot of talking in the library. You know, it being a library and all, this is surprising.

Also? There's apparently some action in the clinic. Not that us folks at Fandom Radio would be looking into that or anything. *Woof! Woof!* Quiet, you. And Johnny-boy's doing some counseling

One final announcement from school: HOLY CRAP, METHOS IS OUT OF THE CLOSET!.

Dorms
*Ruff! Rur ruff!* No. We're not calling it 'the doghouse'. It's not half as cute as you think it sounds.

Anyway, Draco with the increasingly large ass, to match his hips swaggers around the dorms. He chats with Paige and Lily, who I've heard is amazing and makes brownies. Aw, and Lily later organizes a game night for everyone in the dorms.

Also in the dorms, Chloe returns Rory's gun. Rory's confused at this. Speaking of the bunny-abuser, she talks with Professor MacGyver. Also, it's Kry's birthday, and he's already getting a present. It's a relatively quiet night in the biggest dorm room on campus


Town
A Sheriff Don Lamb informs everyone of the town-wide curfew. *Arfy!* Yes, it applies to you. *Ror?* Yes, even if you have to go for 'a walk'. In other news that I think people should know, there are toothy ducks in the pond. Please don't start feeding them your blood and naming them after your unrequited love interest.

In the park, Tara and Callisto talk about the curfew, and Callisto turns down Tara's hug offer, even though she totally needs one. Plus- Tara? You don't turn down that sort of oppourtunity, Callisto.
Also in the park, Evie and Fred are, and I quote "schmoopy". I don't know what it means, but I think it sounds dirty.

At the museum, Paige is late for work and the slayer that is less cool then me applies for a job. Paige and Azriphale go to Wonka's. Mm, candy.

At the Emporium, Michael assures Brenda that the town isn't all that bad. He also explains the concept of can-openers to Salmoneus. Mikey's doing lots of explaining today.

The Haven is hopping. Jake and Kry are cute about birthdays, Lana meets up with Professor Quayle, and George gets to know Quistis.

My goodness, Lana's moved on quick from Archie- she's macking it to Quayle.

Salmoneus pretty much wins at prank phone calls and, by extension, at life in general. Chewbacca opens an account at the bank.

Deb's is busy. And, aw, Professor Amidala and Anakin are so cute. What is it with that boy and authority figures?

At Spike's, The Cat chats up Yazoo and Tex, Tex and Yazoo talk weapons, and Brenda is still trying to get used to town. *snort* Good luck with that.

What the hell?
Apparently, you're all not dumb enough on a daily basis for me to have an 'Idiots' section. But now you all get to hear about the mind-boggling stupidity and insanity that is you.

Callynanders talk about making balloon animals. Out of condoms. Kids, that's not really what they're meant for. You need a demonstration?

*giggles and barks* I'm sorry, one moment. *giggles* *Arf!* Right, right. Draco Malfoy is running for Fandom High's Favorite Fairy. I'm impressed. Pink is totally your color.

Okay, really, Mr. Ten, I don't know you, but you AREN'T ALLOWED TO MAKE CALLY CRY. WE HAVE RULES ABOUT THAT. *Grrrrrrowl.* But at least Anders is there to be cute and help her feel better. That's still NO EXCUSE, Mr. Ten, if that's even your real name, which I hope it isn't because it is WICKED STUPID. Someone should kick you.


But that's all for tonight, kids. I'm leaving you in the very capable hands of Professor Ash tomorrow, and then Barbossa. Don't miss me too much.
And really, be careful. With Kitty Pryde missing, things just- look, don't do anything stupid. And call me or something if you need an escort.

Hey everybody, this is Faith... *sound of barking* and Wilkins, bringing you today's events.

Loose talk in the classroom
(I was NOT using Hot for Teacher.)

In Maths Classes, Prof. Eppes is giving us some impossible problems. Journalism Class is relieved to not have to do extra work. There's some studying going on in Language Class.

Apparently the Chef decided to serve non-singing food today. I'm sure Marty's happy. As are we all. Also, whoever told him vicious lies about me eating too many cookies last night? You're a horrible person.

The info for the Ethics debate is up. Speech Class is tallking about communication with friends and lovers. The Newspaper people talk too damn much. Really- we give the news every day. Well, B does. I help!

In Advanced Negotiations there's a test, the Poetry Schedule is set, and they're discussing what could be different in Quantum Physics.

They talk about like, legends or something in Celtic Studies. Prof. Maclay talks with Major K! in her office hours. Also, there's another Wildcrafting Meeting.

Sociology Classes are cancelled. Hey, so is Art Lab! And History? I applaud the faculty's wise decisions.

And, in Study Hall, I got the coolest puppy EVER *bark!*. And everyone else was very very very boring.

When I get that feeling, I need, sexual healing...

In the clinic, Tara is trying to figure out how to get Maia out of the dreaded and dangerous emocoma. Don't worry, T. I'm sure she'll be back before you get a chance to miss her.

Callisto is getting patched up from her fall onto a mirror. And Marty is also getting fixed up after his fall last night. Thanks, man.

Ash is also in the clinic. And apparently had some bowel issues. Thanks, Prof. Jerusalem.

Love shack, baby love shack

In the stairwell, Aeryn is doing some homework. Then John shows up, and they talk about doctoring and make out.

Anders and Cally are too cute for words. Lee and Crichton talk about girls. Apparenly, girls like to get stuff. And Draco and Lilly are also too cute. Aw, look at big tough Draco, playing with the bondage pirate kitty.

Aw, cheer up, emo kid Illyana. Also, Aeryn, Sam, Janet, and Cameron go running. And Sark is a person again! but not anymore.

Walking down the boulevard....
(I ran out of ideas, ok? Wilkins likes this song. *affirmative yapping*)

In town, the Great Post-It War continues. Can I suggest phones? Carrier pigeons? And, sorry B- Jake gets more coffee. But you got some prezzies yourself, and I'm sure your roommates aren't thrilled.

Tara's talking to Mr. Phale about helping Maia. (See above). And, aw, she bought her candy. Tara is super sweet. I might go into an emocoma, if I get candy.

Crichton and Vala chat over coffee. Draco and Lily are also very cute over coffee. Marty apologizes to Duce and talks about Paige. (Duce, consider this a marriage proposal. I love you.)

Sam's buying repair stuff and talking about weapons. Vala gets a shiny new cell. And Anders and Cally are cute in a different setting. Same cuteness, though.

They found Ash? What? *rustling of papers* My notes say they found Ash. However, he also appears to be in the clinic. *barkity bark!* Yeah, me neither.

CJ and the Doc make up, Tex checks out Deb's, CJ and Methos talk about Angelus, and Sawyer argues with Chaucer and is thrown out by Deb. Also? His mom was an Anne Coulter clone who got pregnant at a Reagan rally. I'm not sure what it means, but apparently it's all very insulting.

It's the end of the world as we know it....

Some batshit crazy gas stuff goes off in Spike's Pub. Spike's got some problems of his own, and argues with Angelus. I heard the words "emo sex muppet". I don't EVER want to know.

Anyway, gas comes, and everyone goes nuts. Chloe freaks, Bob's struck silent (and is sleeping on the Kwik Stop floor), Jay is more annoying than usual, and Xander continues being crazy, but now with hallucinations. Han's got wicked ammounts of issues. And Zaphod isn't doing well, and does less well when Callisto "helps". He has a point though- that outfit does show entirely too much clevage.


And that, finally, is all.
*plays Snakes on a Plane themesong, for fun. Wilkins barks along.*

Hey everybody, Faith here, bringing you the Fandom High news for Thursday, October 5. It's been a day full of bitching and arguing. Oh, and there were debates, too.

Classes
(really, barring gossip, does anyone care about what goes on in school?)

Lifestyle Class gets to write an essay on booze and its effects. I'm suggesting they come visit me before the dance this weekend. I'll be pregaming, no doubt, and you're all invited.

In Cooking, Hank is a cooking whiz and Han manages to cook something well without having the kitchen explode. Yay, budding chefs.

Speaking of, the Chef had 'geek chic' day today. I think.

In gym class Prof. Macleod is being sadistic. The insane professor trend continues in Ash's so-called art class, where students paint pictures of Janet. They're all very creative.

Oh, and wait, in language class, Janet and Carter get into a glarefest, which continues outside class.

Students talk about ugliness in the emergency political headquarters that is Journalism. In Speech, students discuss obediance, compliance, and authority figures. And, damn, but a certain individual who has the same name as a big city in Australia is getting pretty big around the middle. Just saying.

In Governments class, the students are blatantly hitting on the professor. I mean, they're picking topics for their report on governmental officials.

Angelus is forming a club that has no name. They're having a non-partisan debate tomorrow night, for all the candidates, including the write-ins. And, you know what? Their meeting was long and boring and my god when does all this election crap end It looks like we have an ad from them, later in the evening. Excellent.

Anakin is starting Into the Black a flying club.

The do some sort of boring-ass project in Geology. Like any of you care. If you do? World History was dull too. Everyone does some talking about complicated shit in Quantum Physics, if anyone expected something different.

Yay! Boring-ass Anthro classes were cancelled! For the rest of the week! Psych classes were cancelled too. And the Library was closed so the librarian could nap.

After peeking into Fashion Class I had to scrub my brain out. You're warned.

There's some sort of Witch Club thing that Willow started. And some lucky ducks get to go on a Field Trip with Prof. Jareth.

Students do presentations and sign up for a body farm trip (cool!) in Sociology Class.


Study Hall is entertaining as always, with Janet's groupie and friends turned enemies talking about her a lot. What the hell's up with that?

There's a few serious conversations.

Paige is passing out. Owch. Meanwhile, Elizabeth pretty much falls asleep right on her desk. Homework's a killer.


Dorms

There's a catfight between Callisto and Janet. And, wow, she's tougher than you'd think. And everyone's talking about it. Something's up, I think.

There's lots of pretty flowers getting delivered. Touching.

Wednesday, Jack and Beka/Maia/Pheobe have posters hanging up. Beka and Pheobe have flyers too.
There's a flyer for the second debate as well.

Kawalsky has, um, quite the get up. And the 'I thought they were gay!' spaceboys (Lee, Cam, and John) are very very strange. And apparently Cam and Janet are together? Or something. He was very defensive about it.

And, for a non-Janet related story, Parker has a scary, much older stalker with bad taste in music. And I heard a mention of poetry. Rover took care of it.

Back to Janet- apparently, whatever she's been up to lately has made her attractive to teachers. Ash and Prof. Carter drooling? Not something I ever need to see again, thanks. And apparently, it's a showdown. Janet is evil? Whatnow?

And there's some kidnapping and kissing between Kara and Lee. But, wait, no, it's a dream. Poor Lee.

The Clinic is hopping today. Doctor Wilson shows up, Death gets fashion advice from Hank, and Paige gets attention after fainting in Study Hall.

( A quick announcement )

In Town

Prof. Quayle and Maia have an emotional conversation in the coffee shop. Inara, Baogas, and Becky talk (while Miho listens) at the Apple.

Parker and Anya go dress shopping, and so do Angela and Rory. Paige picks hers up at the Emporium.

Deb's is hopping. Paige is finally eating something, Shane and Shep are chatting, and Shane, Rory, and Angela talk about bookcases and debates.

There's some new troublemakers in town, and no one is happy about it.


I figure that it's become so all-consuming of students' time and energy that it deserves its own section, so....
Homecoming and Student Council!

Aw, Edward is asking Wednesday to Homecoming. They're good for each other.

Lilly is still looking for volunteers for the kissing booth and dunk tank for the carnival. Yours truly is going to be manning the kissing booth, and the fabulous pirate himself, B, is going to be in the dunk tank. Me kissing people and a pirate in the water? Marvel at the concept.

You can sign up for Homecoming Photos here. Aw, that's cute.

Okay, now it's time for a super-cool secret announcement. Homecoming King and Queen elections will be opening tomorrow morning- so get your votes in. Lilly says that she'll be setting up the voting when, and I quote, she "damn well feels like it". So there you have it.

And that's all for tonight- oh, wait, except not. There were debates galore. There will be a special broadcast tomorrow with an intensive overview, but I'm going to point out some of the highlights.

President
Six has a plan, should the cafeteria food become sentient and attack.

Vice-President
Baltar won't just wait around for the president to become incapacitated.

Secretary
Someone asked me a pretty interesting question. Anyone like to share who's idea that was? I'll make you snickerdoodles.

Treasurer
Anya knows why the grass is green. And is prepped for the bunnies.

Student Relations
Apparently, the position isn't solely to keep track of who's screwing who. Damn. But Rory is willing to try.

Academic Affairs
Beka likes to touch herself. And apparently doesn't care who knows it.

Security
Alanna thinks that everyone is drunk Also, she does not know the Muffin Man, and does not know how to Fandango (or doesn't know what it is).

Also? The audience seemed to chat a hell of a lot. I'm looking at a good portion of the student body here.



Alright, that's all for today. Tune in tomorrow night for Ash, and what I'm sure are going to be tons of dramatic issues.

Hey Fandomhighers, this is [Bad username or site: @ livejournal.com], filling in for [Bad username or site: @ livejournal.com], and letting you all know exactly what it is that's been happening around here.

Classes

In Journalism Class, students get a chance to ask Professor Jerusalem some personal questions. Because, apparently, seeing him in a clown hat and shoes wasn't traumatizing enough for the poor kids, they have to hear about his homecoming date plans.

Students discuss manipulation in Speech Class, which is exactly what the students around here need more of.

Scooter's forming an AV club to have their first meeting, everyone takes a quiz in Geology, and in Martial Arts Class, Marty asks Professor Kiddo for some extra help about a rather cryptic something.

In Sociology Classes, everyone writes essays while Angelus gives Professor Grissom a present. And his respect. Or something like that.
Grissom's also looking for a TA. Leave him a note!

Professor Methos finds an interesting book in the library, there's a new chef in the cafeteria, and this is your last chance to sign up for Abnormal Psych. Which I totally recomend, if only from the sheer humor of the thing, and the fact that yours truly is in it.

In Intro to World History, students discuss the emperor Agustus. It's as dull as it sounds. Students have to pair off to practice in Language Class, which goes well for some (Ms. Gilmore, as expected), and not so well for others (Charlie and Max? Looking at you.).

In Anthropology Class, Dr. Jackson tries to make the class more interesting. Well, at least he tried, and that's supposedly what counts.

Professor Camulus (who looks damn good in that outfit, I might add), talks about stereotypes of the Celtic people, and how they're incorrect. The Doctor's Quantum Physics class looks incredibly difficult, but the students seem eager.


And in Study Hall, my favorite class of the day, Principal Connor informed everyone that she'll be heading off for the weekend, leaving the student body in the hands of Professor Jerusalem. That noise? Students fleeing for their lives.

Angela's trying to help Marty with some of his personal problems, Barbossa and Quinn work on their fashion designs, Elizabeth's having some boy troubles, and John is just trying to prep for the bake sale. Best of luck with that.

Oh, and I almost forgot what was probably the most...interesting thing in classes all day. Maia practically exploded, because she had a problem with Phoebe talking to Belthazor. I mean, come on. I know he's a little gay odd, but it's no reason to get so mean. Aren't we all supposed to be tolerant?
The fun continued outside study hall.


Off-Campus Fun

The Kwick Stop is busy, as Chewbacca does his shopping and Jay finds his way home.

Angelus is pimping it and talking about bake sale plans over at Wolfram and Hart. They're also hiring, but only virgins and those with clean records. Good luck finding any virgins around here.

Manny's being more than a little creepy on a hill outside town. Yeah, I'm not sure what that's about, but I'll be avoiding it.

We have a town morgue. Take that as you will.

At Chaucer's, there's more Halliwell drama, of a sort.

Deb's Diner is open and delicious. The Perkolator is hopping, with talk of homecoming and dates and such.


In the Dorms

Elizabeth Turner has an poster up. Check it out, guys.

While we're on the subject of posters, ew.

Janet's doing a lot of talking about evil, god-loving robots.

Lisa is putting up the awesomest sign ever and having the longest conversation ever with Angelus in the clinic. (And, aw, she was concerned for my feelings! I'm touched! But don't worry- he's only being nice to me, I couldn't get a date.)

Quick PSA- there's a slight chance that the plauge has been going around the dorms. Please sign yourself in or report others at the first sign of dementia and such. One good Samaratin has already done so, and we are all very appreciative of his efforts to keep our school clean.

Cam spends some time in the gym, making up with Beka, and getting into an argument with Lee over Kara. (Which I don't get, because I thought they were both gay? Is Kara a guy?)

There are more flower deliveries than necessary. Kiki delivers something cool for Rory from Marty.

Belthazor comforts Phoebe after the events of study hall. He then discusses said events with Piper. What can I say, he's a giver.

Anders hangs out in the gym and plays with Lee and talks to Cally. Apparently this 'Pyramid Court' he built is a big deal. You can't see me, but I'm rolling my eyes


The Fun Stuff

And in the biggest dorm room on campus,, there's subtext and groping and more. Oh my!

Callisto talks to Krycek about her and Johnnia's ticket for co-homecoming queens. Where on campus could we even find two more qualified students?

Maia gets a wee bit drunk and angry at Spike's pub, then has a talk with Aziraphale in the park.

Cally's having one hell of a morning, after the slumber party last night. Poor girl.



A special dedication goes out to Beka- the Kaiser Chiefs, Everyday I Love You Less and Less. From your good friend(?), John Sheppard.

Just so everyone knows, starting on Friday, Pirate Radio will be taking ads for the student government campaigns. Give us a copy, and keep it short, people.

That's all from me tonight. I'll be back next week (assuming B lets me), and I'll see you around.
(And one comment from any of you about how I can't work the equipment properly? I'll see you outside of school. Marty better watch himself off-campus. I'm just saying.)