Good morning, everyone, it's Anakin Skywalker here and the shrieking eels are no longer falling from the sky, so that's already makes today a better day than yesterday. Let's get to the notes because naturally there's a lot of them because everyone's response to "angry eels with anti-grav units and oxygen tanks" is apparently "let's go outside!"
Yes, I realize I was also outside. But I
was trying to go to a movie. Before we get to all of the eel killing, we had classes
to get through. And for those of you who aren't from worlds where you're handed weapons on the way to first grade, any absenses yesterday are excused. Mad Kings and Queens
talked about Caligula
and if he was actually insane or if scribes were doing a bit of post-disaster cleanup. Friendship is Cakes
had Derek showing up as a wolf and attacking the animal-shaped cake because the day wasn't weird enough, and then the rest of the class made animal-shaped cakes
too and Hanna
offered another one to Derek. I volunteer not
to be the one getting icing out of a wolf's hair. Thor taught his Modern Myths
students about Bloody Mary--the creepy lady, not the breakfast drink.
...which the squirrels are currently having. Because of course they are. In the dorms
took one look out the window and stayed inside, and Cassandra--fresh from her defense time outside which we'll get to in a moment--agreed
that Gwen had made a good choice. Ronan
, showered and de-eeled, texted a bit in his room. I'll bet the texts were eel-related. Johnny
took us into sundown by blasting eels off the roof with fire, so please be wary of any barbecued eel specials at the sushi place the next few days. It might be slightly recycled.
, Travis got chased up a tree and Kathy
introduced herself while trying to help him out, but Travis told her he was quite all right up the tree. Can someone check to be sure he's still not up there? Hannibal
went after eels with his rifle and Jono stopped by after helping out at the movie theater--we'll get to that too--and Hannibal caught
some to cook. Um.
He's apparently having an eel-themed party tonight so there's...that.
Moving on. Vic told Ralph that she didn't care if there were invading eels
, it was still her day off. See, Obi-Wan? I told you. This is a regular thing. I was at the movie theater
, annoyed because sometimes I just want things to be normal and not full of eels and is that too much to ask
Apparently it is. And then we had what amounted to an impromptu teachers' meeting. Obi-Wan
was there, of course, to lecture me about anger management and to cancel our movie plans so we could continue aiding the public. You're welcome, the public. He also punned at Atton
, who wanted to know from if Obi-Wan was for real with this
and sadly, yes. Yes, that was my life for decades. Lecturing and terrible jokes. Cara was there as well, and she and Atton wondered if the theater has a replay policy
for when prebought tickets can't be redeemed due to eels. Or invasions. I was impressed with Cara's weapons and she wasn't convinced
about how I wasn't
on a date.
I WASN'T. I'M MARRIED. YOU WERE THERE FOR THE WEDDING. Jones
had eels in her purse, so I checked to make certain that this whole mess wasn't her doing--it wasn't--and she complimented Obi-Wan about how he and I are kriffing adults working through our issues and NOT ON A DATE
--and Jono gave Obi-Wan a bit of history in Fandom daylong invasions
as they killed eels together. Jones asked Jono if the eels were a regular feature
and he said no, but there had been sharks before, and then Jono and I wondered if we should stock up on eel
for that inevitable weekend when we all go crazy and run the island entirely via the currency of contraband sushi.
Meanwhile, closer to the school, Cassandra
was punching eels with a trash can lid, as you do. Anders stopped by with his staff and they admired each others' weapons of choice before examining the eels' anti-grav devices
. I did the same thing. I mean, really, who has the kind of time to arm eels with anti-grav devices? Jalian
was excited to kill things even if they don't know where they came from, and Kathy
joked that she kills eels every morning for exercise. Hanna wanted to know if they should collect the eels for soup
--Anders was not a fan--and Jalian and Cassandra decide that after looking over the eels' devices that none of it was for communication
, so kriff it. Jalian was confused at Kathy's chosen weapon of pretty ribbons
--can't blame her--and then Kathy complimented Cassandra's swordwork
told Kathy this was the weirdest thing ever
, which was how Kathy knew she was new.
Roland led a bunch of eels
, Pied Piper-style, down to the beach, and Kenzi featured eels on the menu at Luke's
because you're all inappropriate and weird. I'm heading to my office, and then maybe out for a movie.
An eel-less movie.