WTFH

Aly: "Hi everybody! So this Aly and this black cat totally dragged me into the radio station because apparently everyone wants to hear from me. So hi!"

Faithful: "This is Faithful. Apparently, I'm as insane as my owner and decided to drag a total stranger to do radio with me."

Aly: "You're really cute though. For a cat. Are you sure you're not a demon?"

Faithful: "...Positive. Where are you from again?"

Aly: "LA."

Faithful: "LA...LA...LA." *snort* "That explains a lot."

Aly: *LONG pause* "What exactly are you implying?"

Faithful: "You know? Even I'm not that sure." *another long pause* "So who exactly did you grow up with?"

Aly: "Angel and Logan. Nosy like a cat too. Come on now, how do we do this? I went to this school, but only nerds did radio." *pause* "Umm, I mean..."

Faithful: "I'm going to pretend you didn't say that. Just read the pretty notes the squirrels left you and make up random stuff about people."

( Today, in Fandom, the world turned orange. )

Aly: "Mmm, sugar. I could use more sugar. It'd be fun." *flips through notes* "Wait, we're done? Yes! Okay, crazy people of Fandom, you're all nuts. Cute boys? Look me up."

Faithful: "Room 326. Alcohol. Brain bleach. Shrimp."

Aly: "That's the cat. Not me. Just to be clear."

Faithful: "Exactly. Night Fandom!"

Aly: "Don't let the bedbugs bite! Or the gnarl demons, ick."

Faithful: "It's Thursday evening and my human co-host is nowhere to be seen. What to do, what to do? Wait for her and waste your valuable - ha! - time with chatter and music or just start without her? I don't feel like wasting my time, so I'll just annoy you all with my take on the news. Enjoy!

School
Guitar presents on heroes. Someone just ran into the door. Artifacts talks about Atlantis. Someone is now hitting the door. There's a debate about the existance of Atlantis. IT'S OPEN you idiot! Oh hey, who are you?"

( Oh look, a change in the program. )

Faithful: "So why don't you make them?"

Marco: "Because most people, not cats, are intelligent enough to realize the joke themselves and laugh without needing me to point out the obvious."

Faithful: "I think we've already prooven who's the most intelligent here."

Marco: "I control the can opener."

Faithful: "I control you."

Marco: "No you don't."

Faithful: "Yes, yes I do. So there. Good night Fandom!"

Marco: "Wha-oh. Good ni-"

Faithful: "Good evening Fandom. I have been abandoned by my co-host."

Alanna: "Which would be how I got into this gig."

Faithful: "I need someone with thumbs!"

Alanna: "Good to know that's all I'm good for."

Faithful: "You work a can-opener well."

Alanna: "You can't tell, but I'm rolling my eyes here."

Faithful: "I'm being abused."

Alanna: "Ugh, can we just get on to the news?"

Faithful: "That we can."

School. Where there is learning
Alanna: "So today, Media looked at stereotypes. There are none for talking cats that I can think of. Sad. Interstellar Relations asks and answers questions."

Faithful: "Always a good activity. Pop Culture reviews. Joxer finds out that the Macarena is unpopular culture. They should have a class on that. Cross Species Communication works on their final projects. Sure. And Spanish watches a movie. Boring."

Alanna: "Everything is always boring for you."

Faithful: "Not everything."

Alanna: "Fine, almost everything. Prophecy talks about self-fulfiling prophecies. Those always make my head hurt. Marty tells Pippi what he did to Bel. ... Dirty? Dean smuggles something in his jacket. I used to do that, but then you started talking too loudly. However, I doubt Dean has a kitten in there. Also in that class, Wilson sends Nadia to the clinic. Oh Nadia. Not again."

Faithful: "And here I thought only cats had nine lives. World History reviews by playing 20 questions and hangman. Heh. Various teachers had office hours. As did the principal and vice-principal. Jack and Isabel visited the first and Parker the second."

Alanna: "The library was vaguely busy today. I'm kind of worried, since Angela and Parker use it to plan revenge. Just uh...don't do anything that might have an effect on oh, me in the next week, okay? And uh, Chad looks for a book on muscles. I don't want to know. Angela! Shame on you, eating in the library!"

Faithful: "You're strange."

Dorms. Where there is living.
Alanna: "Conner doesn't realize that it's not October and is wearing a costume and watching a kids show. Cally thinks he's a crazy fanboy. Conner doesn't help his case when he tells Billy about being thrown into trees."

Faithful: "And apparently the reason for his strange behavior? He made a wish. Smart boy, really. Who then comes out to Chad. Take that as you will. And for reasons unknown to this cat, Z tries to cut Conner out of his uniform. You people are so weird."

Alanna: "That we are. Peter Parker planned something sinister with Sakurazaki who then calls Cally for help. That worries me. Peter and Cally decide to watch TV instead."

Faithful: "Why is it every time I do the news, Bel and Phoebe are snuggly. Do they hate me? Cameron wants to know what Bel did. Don't we all. And a lot of people leave town. Will they come back?"

Alanna: "I hope so, because Peter not Parker, Willow, Bel, Phoebe, Lana, and Zuko are on that list. Jamie can stay away. Conner wakes up in his uniform. Suddenly, the earlier comments make sense. Wilson talks to Marty about Bel. Someday, someone will tell me what happened."

Faithful: "That day is not today. But! Nadia visits Marty. And uh, Billy has a thing with Christmas and radio. Don't tell me. Finally, Lana wakes Jim by packing. I have a feeling a lot of our notes were backwards onight."

Town. Where there is living
Alanna: "Wilson leaves cookies for the Doctors. Isn't he a doctor? I'm confused. Um...this doesn't help. The Doctor talks with Jane about snogging another Doctor. Um...okay. In less odd news, Snarky Repairs is open."

Faithful: "If your snark is broken, go on in! And speaking of open places: Caritas. And the clinic. Both times. Also, Braca has an eyepatch. You don't want to know."

Alanna: "The squirrels are right, I don't. Let's see, what else. Wilson checks out the new health center. Jane checks out the Weasleys. I never, ever needed to know that. Apu is cranky. I can totally relate. Are you going to die on Saturday, too?"

Faithful: "You're not going to die. Chad and Pippi are at Empire Records. They're not going to die either. And it's Argentian Tango Day at Church. This makes the squirrels happy."

Alanna: "Scary, scary squirrels. The Devil's Nest is busy tonight. Wilson is becoming a regular. Dr. Venture shows of his toupee. I've got nothing. Rosette gets a drink and hit on by Dr. Venture and his magical toupee. She's then bouncy at Lucifer. Okay. Lucifer sneaks up on Wilson at the pool table."

Faithful: "And that's all for us for tonight!"

Alanna: "Stay crazy Fandom! And if I don't come back? Know that where ever I am, I am thinking of you all and desperately wishing I was back. Stay safe."

FAITHFUL: Good evening! To take a break from all the boring human announcers, I'll be doing your radio tonight. For those of you who don't get it: I'm a cat. Meow. New students, neither you or I are insane. Well, you might be insane, I'm just a talking cat.

BEL: And I'm a demon. Just for anyone who didn't know.

FAITHFUL: Right, news. Screeeeech. Note to self: Claws on microphone are bad.

BEL: Don't break anything. Veronica will kill us.

FAITHFUL: It's her fault for forgetting to get a replacement before she went out of town.

BEL: She had other things on her mind. Like what she's doing to Archie now. *snicker*

FAITHFUL: ... Yuck.

( And now for the ... news )