WTFH

This be likeguidelines bringin' ye the latest in news from Fandom High.

Readin', Writin', 'Rithamatic
Thar be a class trip to the Plottin' Zoo. Like everything else here, it be not quite normal.

Angela be meetin' up with the Plot Marmoset 'n findin' everythin' t'be worthy o' questions, Rory be touchin' the Purple Prose Puppy 'n expressin' herself rather ornately, and Marty be gettin' nipped by the Plotypus 'n thinkin' he be in John Cusack movies.

Alanna be touchin' the Drunken Monkey 'n thinkin' she be drunk. And fallin' inter the Plot Dolphin tank. Fortunately thar be a superhero on the trip--Professor Tick be helpin' her out. Hamlet be licked by the Plot Gnu 'n be stuck spoutin' Shakespearean sonnets. Jack Harkness be gettin' spit on by the Plot Camel 'n thinkin' he be Jeannie from "I Dream of Jeannie." And he be thinkin' Hamlet be his Master. And then a plot bunny be makin' them both think that they be ninjas.

Kawalsky be touchin' the Plot Snake 'n thinkin' he be Samuel L. Jackson. Then a plot bunny be touchin' Rory. The Godzilla!Rory v. Mace Windu!Kawalsky be not t'be missed. Professor Tick's be fallin' into the Punguin Tank and be gettin' punny. More punny?

Han be touched by a plot bunny 'n thinkin' he be shrinkin' fer a while before bein' nipped by the Emo Emu. Professor Cregg by spit on by the Drama Llama 'n be discoverin' that everything be so dramatic. She also be runnin' inter an old friend. Or at least be thinkin' she be runnin' inter an old friend. Silly plot bunnies. She 'n Zero be affected by a plot bunny that be makin' them reveal all of their inner dialogue. Then at the plot amoeba display, Zero be discoverin' that everythin' be an epiphany.

Elizabeth be touchin' the Plot Armadillo 'n takin' offense at everythin'. She 'n Professor Tick be thinkin' they be married fer a while, too, thanks to a plot bunny. And Lisa be gettin' drenched by the Plot Elephant 'n be losin' her short-term memory.

In non-zoo news, Professor Seimei be holdin' office hours, Special Collections be openin' up again on Monday, Professor Dream be changin' his class schedule a bit, and the Journalism project from Duce 'n Delerium, Jes' say yes t' body art! be gettin' kicked off today.

In the clinic, Maia's still sufferin' from her emo-coma thing. She be gettin' some visitors, though. Duce, Paige, Sawyer, and O'Neill also be stoppin' into the clinic with various ailments that we be too polite t'broadcast here.

Jonathan be available fer counselin' sessions today, too.

Roomin'
Parker be runnin' fer Academic Affairs Chair, the elections for which be held tomorrow.

Aeryn be takin' care of Professor Tick's Cube o' Wonder in the common room. She be discussin' the Cube 'n what be makin' it so wonderous wit' Sharon, and then be askin' Crichton t'explain the Cube. He be refusin', then he 'n a whole lot o' people be makin' up vile tales of what the Cube o' Wonder could be used fer. Anders be joinin' Aeryn in the confusion o'er the Cube. Professor Tick finally be returnin' from the field trip to reclaim it. He be not havin' much luck wit' it, either.

Jonathan be cleanin' his room, then be talkin' in the common room about that thing that he 'n Draco might have done that meant absolutely nothin'. Because look! Lily!

Crichton be playin' music entirely too early in the morning. Cam 'n Vala be not that appreciative. I be gettin' an attack o' sugar shock with all the happy people who not be woken up by loud music today. The happy smilin' be includin', but in no way limited to Kara, Parker, and Callynanders, which be a new word as far as I be concerned.

Mr. Flinkman's outside! I thought he be a figment of me imagination fer a while, meself. But he be talkin' with Veronica, so he must be real.

Shep be out of the clinic. Welcome back, Shep! And Angela 'n Marty are bein' less awkward around each other, Aeryn 'n Lee be in the gym together, Kara 'n Anders be practicin' fer their big tryout that be comin' up, Parker 'n Callisto be havin' a chat about the Ethics class project, and Professor Maclay be givin' all her neighbors on the first floor candy.

And now we be pausin' fer a ( commercial from the Aficionado Arms )

Revelin'
New sacred duty fer CRACK: feed the ducks. Speakin' of feedin' the ducks, Crowley be doin' so and makin' a new friend in Angelus. It be nice t'see Angelus make friends. He always has such interestin' ones.

Becky 'n Chaucer be meetin' in the park, and Professor Cregg be runnin' into Professor Methos on her way back from church.

Frank 'n Bagaos be talkin' business at the Aficionado Arms and frogs be hitchin' some rides home from Mass this mornin'.

Logan-who-be-not-a-bunny 'n Allie be bein' cute at home and at movies.

Add Paige t'the list o' people at this school who be possessed in the last few weeks. Lily 'n Michael be helpin' her, Aziraphale be exorcisin' her--anyone else be knowin' he could do that? I didn't know he could do that--then Michael, Lily 'n Sawyer be takin' her back to the Emporium and assurin' her that Chaucer be totally buyin' the "I turned evil and didn't mean to be a huge bitch t'ye" argument. I personally wouldn't be puttin' any money on that meself.

Anyone who be stoppin' into Aziraphale's shop be meetin' up with his friend Crowley, who be not quite as nice. Sorry 'bout that, Shane. Aziraphale be a little worn out from the whole exorcism thing, anyway.

After a really early phone call, Rory 'n Logan-who-still-be-a-bunny be chattin' with Krycek 'n Jake at the Echolls House.

Sam, O'Neill 'n Janet be havin' coffee at the Perk before runnin' into Jonas Quinn, a newcomer in town who be lookin' pretty familiar t' them. Rory be thar, too, conductin' peer mediator interviews, but it's mostly about the vampire puppy and Logan-who-still-be-a-bunny. She be catchin' up with her mom 'n Lane, and Parker be stoppin' by t'show off her new frog.

At Deb's, George 'n Jayne be talkin' about the fear toxin at Spike's, and a bunch of folks be stoppin' in and chattin' about their experiences at the plottin' zoo. Wilson be stoppin' by Spike's tonight, too.

That be all from the Crow's Nest. Keep an eye out fer the Rover, and have a good night!