WTFH

JOHN: Hello all you prom going girls and guys out there! This is John with an 'h' coming at you live. I've been to prom, I've lived prom and I've kicked prom's ass!

RITA: Oh, ick, you're here.

JOHN: What the heck are you doing here? Prom date stand you up?

RITA: No, I got bored. Are you doing radio? Who are you impersonating this week?

JOHN: No, I'm not doing radio. I'm attempting to liberate a small country in Europe through only the power of my voice. Of course, I'm doing radio.

RITA: You're doing it wrong. Let me see those notes.

JOHN: Hands off the goods, lady.

RITA: Oy, I wasn't after your "goods." It's your own fault for shifting that way.

JOHN: Anyone out there that's listening and who does radio? Is there a some kind of spray I can use to get rid of her?

RITA: Oh, hush. Now...*shuffling papers* let's see. There was some sort of...thingy tonight, wasn't there?

JOHN: Please tell me you're not planning on staying...

RITA: You obviously need supervision.

JOHN: You've obviously been hit on the head. I don't need supervision.

RITA: Yes, you do. Otherwise you might electrocute yourself or something.

JOHN: Don't you have to take your Metamucil or something? Keep you regular?

RITA: I don't know what that means. Now hush and tell the nice audience what happened in detention today.

( ZOMG BFF! )

JOHN: In case anyone was wondering, Professor Skeeter just proposed to me.

RITA: I proposed that you go away, yes.

JOHN: She gave me a ring and everything. But she demands I take her last name. John Skeeter? Sounds terrible. Rita Crichton? What say you all?

RITA: *sounds of headdesking*

JOHN: You're all invited to the glorious wedding! We'll be serving vienna sausages with cheese whiz, Rita's favorite!

RITA: And John will be a lovely bride.

JOHN: And Rita has a womanly moustache. Say goodnight, dear!

RITA: Enjoy hell.

[Co written with imanaturalblond who I LOVE MORE THAN PIE AND CHOCOLATE AND PIZZA.]