Fandom Radio [Thursday, September 28, 2006]

[like-a-sponge.livejournal.com]

"Hey, hey, hey Fandom, this is Greg Sanders and I'm here broadcasting live. Unless you're listening to the podcast, which Jaye already bitched about last night so I'll skip that and ahead to the relatively good stuff.

Schooliness

Okay, so War Theory went over Moral Law, which sounds a lot like Santa Claus's area. Like, Moral Law means that someone out there knows when you're being good or bad and if you're the latter, then you're getting the social equivalent of coal in your stocking. And in Philosophy of Values talked about choice versus chance, and I wanna know if all the lessons have those cute little almost-rhymey themes.

So, in Dance, they waltzed, and I don't know how to waltz but that would be really cool to learn. In Science! we did stuff with motion, which is when you run around or fall down or move at all and it is very, very important, dudes. Myth into History talked about Goliath who was big. Did you guys talk about David? Let's hear it for scrawny guys who can kick some ass! I am so investing in a slingshot. And in Ethics, there were cookies and apparently Darth Jamie. Hey, Jamie, dude? Did you do the breathey thing? Because that is scary and it really makes the whole thing.

So, the library was open but it was boring and no one came in. Probably because Rory bites. Not dirty, just mean. And Principal Washburn, Mr. Sam and Dean's Daddy, Mr. Aziraphale, Dr. Wilson, and Dr. Reid all had office hours, and also the office was open.

And in clubbiness, Self Defense met, made with the introducey and mingled, and the paper people met and talked to Rory. Ick.

Okay, and in the cafeteria, Walter ate pizza with a heavy Swedish accent. You know, my people are Norwegian. I could try to say that in a Norwegian accent. Peeza. Peeeeeeeeezzzaaaaaa. Peezza.

I think I'm done now.

Dorminess

Okay so this morning in the fifth floor common room, Lyra made French toast but the only one to show was John Connor. WTF, people? It's French toast. You show up for French toast.

Unless, of course, you were on the roof, for which I can forgive people as apparently a whole hell of a lot happened up there. Such as Bel giving Matilda a run-through on not emoing at the plants, and Cally testing her hooch. Correction - her viper hooch. Now, I don't know what hooch is, but it sounds really dirty. So Cally, either you are really brazen, or there was some kind of weird orgy thing going on on top of the roof...or else I'm confused about the meaning of this word. It certainly doesn't fit in with the further roof stuff involving Bel apparently getting his ass kicked by Nadia, though Billy stretching might have been related to the hooch and viper stuff.

Anyways, so the twins and Matilda are still throwing paper at each other, and Bridge made with the meditating while Anders and Door distracted him. Lana and Jim were totally hot and heavy once they get Chad to leave. Poor Chad, having to leave. I mean, not that you probably wanted to stay, but dude, where did you go?

Blair and River were kinda adorable earlier today, and Ranma talked to Teddy about being a girl. Whatever floats your boat, man.

In the fourth floor common room, the twins partook of Sakurazaki's brownies probably not dirty. And in the fifth floor common room, Nadia channel-surfed and talked to Anders about bad luck, and then Lavender offered to make Bel puke slugs. That would be whoa useful. Can we make anyone do that? Just for fun?

Luke and Rory headed into space, and that whole sentence just made me really nervous. Here's hoping she didn't make them explode by crashing them into a satellite or anything. Because that would actually screw up someone's cell phone reception, which is really sad. Bel got a call from his lady, and Jack watched the storm from his window. Eric talked to Parker about Jaye, and dude, way to score on a Homecoming date. I mean, she's naturally not as good a date as the one I have, but then who is?

Jude and Sakurazaki had a date, and Walter was asked to tell Nadia she's an idiot. Ouch. Tough situation, man. That's when I'd be fleeing to do something else. Like feeding my cat! Even if I don't have a cat. It's a great excuse, shut up. Tyler and Alec were all sneakalicious, and the twins chatted.

On the third floor, Will was watching froggies on the TV. Alphonse came along and discussed kitties and froggies, and kitties were a motif with English Peter as well, and he also talked about classes with Alphonse. See how everyone came full circle there? I like that. Do that more often, people.

Anyway, Chad and Will talked about the band going to Caritas, and he talked about being a bodyguard with English Peter, and being busy with Alphonse. Um, he talked about being busy to Alphonse. Not like, dirty. Peter who's my roomie asked Chad about sleep, which is random, and Will shared cookies. The Peters discussed copy-editing eagles, which I fully embrace, and my roommate who is Peter met Alphonse finally. Then Agnes showed, and she talked to Chad about size - which doesn't matter, Alphonse about magic, and she said hi to the Peters.

And in other news, Billy watched a movie in the fourth floor common room.

Towniness

Aw, Marie too lunch to Jamie at Empire Records, and Sakurazaki surprised Jude at Luke's. Isabel, I expect a surprise visit at Caritas this weekend! Except now it's not really a surprise. Don't worry, I'll make a surprised face anyway. And Sister Rosette went to confession, which is kinda cool. I always wanted to hang out in one of those little booth thingies. No reason. Just to hang out.

Barbossa did his radio thingy, and the band was on. Then Willow stopped by to feed the squirrels. Did you feed them nuts, Willow? Because that is a stereotype. Some squirrels like gummi bears. Take that into account, people.

Jane was a productive employee and was chilling in the storage room at All and Sundries today, and Dawn helped Giles out in his store, while Billy wanted a book for Lit.

Cafe Fina was open, as was the clinic. Tonight at Caritas, Jaye played bartender. This resulted in Coach GOB Boss Guy, Angela, Marty and Mr. Sam and Dean's Daddy talking with her and antagonizing her. As you do. And Eric walked in, and then out. Also as you do.

And that's it, guys. Feed the squirrels well, don't emo at the plants, and remember that if things get bad you can always feed your cat."

Fandom Radio, September 29

[http://users.livejournal.com/weissguy_/]

"Hey everybody. Eric Weiss here. Stuff happened, I tell you what it is. If this hasn't become clear, then uh, maybe you don't actually comprehend the English language. Hola. Bonjour. Yo.

Boredom, Unadulterated Boredom. Or As The Administration Would Have It, School

Friday announcements bring a fresh round of punished souls. This week on Detention All-Stars, it's Jamie, Agnes, and special guest star Blair Sandburg. Good luck, guys.

Elliott tells the students not to smoke. In this school, students smoking is usually a precursor to students on fire. Luckily, there's a helpful movie to prevent personal flambé.

Health and Fitness class wants you to go the distance. Stamina, folks. It's what turns the unimaginative into great lovers.

Constant Vigilance is all about alien races that mimic humans. You gotta admit, there's no better time for the question "When am I ever gonna use this stuff?" Students pair up and pretend to be something they aren't. How is this different than the rest of high school? The Doctor and Jack talk about hot dates. Not with each other, I hope.

Prophecy lab deals out the Tarot cards. You know, I kind of regret not taking the lab now. I could predict the future and have it mysteriously appear in your shirt pocket.

We had a mostly lame Assembly, although there was some good stuff. Blair tells us we could make a difference, GOB teaches us the value of... doing stuff, Stuart Smalley wants us to think positive, and Matt Foley warns of the dangers of vans, rivers, and being him. Oh, and Walter and Pip demonstrate glitter magic. That part was actually a hoot. Students ask questions of the speakers. The pressing one to my mind -- how do you live with yourselves?

Jamie Madrox collected no trash this week. Or the squirrels are witholding that information to spare my sanity. I might just cry. You know, a strong, stoic man-cry.

Office Hours! Here's who had 'em: Josh Lyman, Jenny Calendar, Ms. Frizzle, Alianne, V, and Daniel Jackson. Over at the Fandom High office, there's one sad gremlin office worker who's unlucky in love. If at first you don't succeed... why is there a gremlin working in the office?

The Student Council meets up. They begin their sinister plans for Homecoming. The Sophomores will be planning the Court. If I start a campaign for Bel for Homecoming Queen, do I get to bet in my own deadpool? The Juniors work the Carnival. I am determined to win some sort of stupidly cute stuffed animal for my date. This may involve cheating. The Seniors are planning the dance itself. Alanna wants ideas for torturing the alumni. Isn't making them come back enough? Later in the meeting, JD suggests a dance-off. I'm afraid of you, dude. There's a vote for Student Council president. I already know it's not me. Unless there's a secret write-in campaign.

Oh, the Library enjoys patronage. You try fitting that kind of a headline into the present tense.

Dorm Dormy Dorm Dorm Dorm

Jim's an asshole. ...and still an asshole.

Willow and English Peter Guy do the cute snuggling thing. Let me here you say Awwwwwwwww.

Pippi is back! I have no idea where the hell she went, but she's back, and Pip's there to see it.

Jim remains an asshole.

John and Aeryn get domestic. Which isn't nearly as much fun as when they get sexy. Not that I've seen it. That'd be weird. Also, potentially hazardous to my health.

Lana is hurt because Jim's a giant douche. Lavender comforts her. How she does this is something I leave up to your imaginations.

Over in the Fourth Floor Common Room, Blair's watching scary movies. Willow shows up and they talk about the dumb of horror movie characters. Yes, run up the stairs. Now, tell the weird-looking stranger to call the police. Ignore the pruning shears. Buffy would tend to agree. Lavender doesn't have a date for Homecoming. Eric Weiss does. Not to gloat or anything. But Blair's there to help, in no way disrupting her self-image by describing the Freshman 15. Billy and Lavender and 10 out of 10 podiatrists agree -- being sick sucks. Joxer's afraid of the scary movie, but Kaylee's there to protect him.

Where The Streets Have Weird Names

Artie smells something funny. He who smelled it... has a nose. C'mon, I'm not in eighth grade here, people.

Blair shows up at Aero-dynamic-page-tiki to tell Lana that Jim is an asshole. I really cannot stress that point enough.

There's a great gathering of Winchesters at Fast Eddie's. Unconfirmed sources state that the janitorial crew is demanding double pay to clean up all the testosterone they laid down over the course of the evening. Maybe they could borrow the estrogen from Wilson and Phale's table. Did I just say that? Is this thing on?

Over at Caritas, drinks are served by Dean Bartender The Tick. And by drinks, I mean chocolate milk. Yay? He encourages Lana, who is having a bad time of it, what with Jim being a dick and all. Sister Rosette wants booze. I can't blame her, but The Tick isn't givin' it up. Aly suggests being sneaky. John Connor pops in to suggest maybe not pissing off the really massively huge superhero in blue tights. Good call John.

The Clinic is empty. The Tick's no-alcohol zone is ruining this town's health care economy. How are people supposed to have flimsy excuses for unrestrained aggression now?

Well, that's all the news that looked interesting. And some I'm just obligated to talk about. Remember kids, Homecoming is coming up. Get your suits ready or your dresses prepped. And going stag is only cool if you're actually a deer.