Fandom Radio, Thursday

[lockestheway]

*loud and excessive chittering*

Hello, Fandom. I'd like to apologise in advance for the squirrels. They've been hitting the rum a little hard lately, and I think they've started to display some paranoid delusions--

*chittering*

...and apparently now they want praise because they've managed to write 'Apocalypse Now!' on the walls in berry juice. Yeah, I think you're cut off for the night.

*cheeeeet!*

I don't care.

( Peter Is Totally Okay Radio. )

And that's the way to do it. Keep working, keep playing, keep dreaming. Whenever you have free time, stop by the library. Help us out. Fandom keeps a great deal of knowledge, and there's going to be something in here somewhere.

...

Squirrels, now you can play me out.

*dramatic music starts playing again*

Thank you, Fandom. Good luck, and good night.

*dramatic music keeps playing as Peter leaves the station*

Fandom Radio, Thursday (Evening)

[bigdamnprincipal]

Ever since Susan came to her office, Zoe had been looking for anything she could find on these Auditors - in between answering world-ending phone calls and drinking heavily - and had come up with nothing. The drinking heavily probably hadn't helped, but it was keeping her calm, and she hadn't stopped being a soldier long enough to know that that was important in times like these.

She'd thought about making an announcement at the school, but this wasn't just affecting the students and teachers, and the more people who were aware of what they might be up against, the better. So, Zoe headed for the radio station, giving one of the squirrels a grateful look when it turned on the equipment for her without her even having to ask.

"Good afternoon, everyone. This is Zoe Winchester," she said, keeping her tone as calm as possible. "I apologize for the interruption, but I have some information on those who might be responsible for the disappearances that have been plaguing our friends and family. I've been informed that the people responsible for the current situation, if they can be referred to as people at all, are called Auditors. Unfortunately, that's all I know so far. I don't know why they've targeted Fandom's loved ones, or how they're doing what they're doing, and I'm hoping that's where all the smart folks here can come in."

Zoe sighed, getting quiet for a moment to maintain her composure. "If you've lost people, or your home, or entire worlds, then know that I am truly sorry. But I'd also like you to remember that trouble likes to find us, and we always send it back to where it came from in the end. Do not think of this as permanent, or there's no point in hoping at all. Gather what information you can, and as always, please stay safe. Thank you."

[NFI, reaction comments welcome!]