Fandom Radio :: Wednesday, August 22.

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

Turtle: "Good evening, Fellow Fandomites, and a good evening it is, indeed. Of course, it is Wexler Wednesday here on WTFH, and, believe it or not, it almost didn't happen! I know! After not having it last week (although I hear my replacement did a wonderful job; thanks, Anne!), I don't know if you'd be able to handle another week without me. Thanks to the best boyfriend in the world, I've made it here and I even brought in a specia--"

"Jeff! Stop poking it!"

Jeff: "Turtle? Are you certain you're all right like this?"

Turtle: "Well, if you stopped poking at it..."

Jeff: "I wasn't poking it, I was just... lingering somewhere in the area!"

Turtle: Long pause. "That's not good, either. You'll only make it worse, and it tickles a little."

Jeff: "...So I just read these?" Rustling of papers. "Are you certain it's not dangerous?"

Turtle: "Well, you have to watch for papercuts, and if you talk about Turtle & Canary too much, the squirrels throw acorns and sometimes pens, but, for the most part, it's very safe. I do this every week, and I'm okay. Except for the fact that I have backwards knees at the moment, but that's all because our temporary principal is an evil little wench and because someone keeps lingering around them."

Jeff: "Okay."

Turtle: "Okay. Before we get to the news, though, the stocks, of course, are going up again, which is I can't complain about, with the Dow Jones at an increase of 1.11 percent, which is an awesome number, and then the NASDAQ's got a nice little 1.25! So yay! Now the news! Jeff, start us out?"

( Who in their right mind approved this? )

Turtle: "Might not be a bad lecture to have, really. And, uhhh....look. We're all out of notes."

Jeff: "Really? I thought I might've just sat down on some. I've got to learn to coordinate, you never know when you might end up sitting on an unintended object."

Turtle: "...I almost wish now that you'd sat on a squirrel. Did you sit on any notes, then?"

Some rustling and crackling.

Jeff: "...No."

Turtle: "Awww. Then I guess we're done. All that's left is to say good night, Jeff."

Jeff: "Good night! Be careful you don't sit on anything and remember, spies are everywhere! You've got to be careful!"

Turtle: "Ninjas, too! There were more ninjas than spies tonight. Oh, and Umbitch is a lying stupidhead. G'nite!"

"... Jeff, you have to help me up, ohmigawd...."


[[ co-written with the super amazing awesome scary_jeff, who gets mad props. We're both depriving ourselves past the point of health for your entertainment. You'd better enjoy it *eyes narrow* ]]

It's Drive Time, Babies! [all morning]

[fever-babies.livejournal.com]

"Good morning, babies!" came a slightly hyperactive voice over the airwaves. "This is Doctor Johnny Fever bringing you the latest hits that'll help you get to work this beautiful Thursday down here in beautiful Fandom! You're listening to the only game in town, WTFH, where the coffee's hot, the music's great and the squirrels' aim is incredibly accurate. I'm new around here, babies, so let me have it! Tell me what's going down in this town!"

It was hard to figure out where the guy paused for breath. "In return for in-form-may-shun, I'll play your requests. But not elevator music. The Doctor's got standards, babies!"

He flipped on Aretha Franklin's "Respect" and cranked it.

Good morning, Fandom!