Fandom Radio, April 4

[actingltcrumpet.livejournal.com]

Hello and good evening, Fandom! This is Lieutenant Archie Kennedy here, debriefing you on today's activity here in this fair if bizarre town and -- no, damn it, sod off! Beg pardon, folks, there was a lemur on my hat. Anyway as I was saying, this is Archie Kennedy at the helm, here on Tuesday night's Royal Navy Radio. Not to waste time so let's get right to it, shall we?

Schooling

This morning in Advanced Criminal Justice, we watched television. I still don't understand what's going on in that Crime and Punishment show. We also learned that we'll be getting a guest speaker next week in class, and this news was greeted with . . . rather strong reactions from some quarters. In Classics and Foreign Literature, the former read a fable from Ovid's Metamorphoses while the latter had a quiz. Political Campaigning talked about television advertising, women in Arthurian times were the subject of Arthurian Traditions -- imagine that, and Business classes worked on their final projects. In Speech classes, the 201 students worked on their speeches about what they've learned from Fandom High, which should be very interesting indeed and the 301 class was overrun by lemurs. Not surprising as the whole school was.

Introduction to Archaeology discussed Egyptian animals and took a quiz on the gods and goddesses of Egypt; in not entirely unrelated news, General Physical Conditioning worked on flexibility and Sociology of Sex Cultures worked on a project about erotic art. You know, some of us just call this pornography. I hear this Internet is very good for that sort of thing.

Western Civilisation discussed the Crusades and the High Middle Ages, and no, Jesus was not a white man from Oxford, History of Medieval England talked about the War of the Roses, and that charming rogue of an art teacher was mysteriously missing from both History of Art and Studio Art.

Finally, in the class news you've all been waiting for, Advanced Journalism compiled questions to pose to their interviewees. And it's a good thing that John Crichton the Menagerie Man, who seems to be talking to himself lately, got turned into a miniature zebra today, and not a lemur. His coat would have matched their tails nicely though, stripes and all.

In the library, Angela and Parker had a talk about Jarod and about Marty leaving, the latter of which was also discussed by Rory and Angela. And in the mess hall Walter, Pippi and Nadia were having a pleasant enough lunch until the lemurs broke it up.

Happenings in the Wardroom and the Chain of Command

Professor Cregg was in her office and hiding from the lemurs . . . oh, speak of the devil, off my leg! Off my leg! Dear God in Heaven, what are you -- oh, for God's sake.

*muted sounds of a brief but spectacular scuffle, followed by a loud thud and several moments of silence*

And Professor Camulus was attacked by some odd furry elephant-like creatures and I'm just not asking.

By and large, you students are a fairly healthy lot; nobody came by the school clinic today, though Lilly Kane was in the town clinic during Doctor Troy's shift and presumably during Doctor Lambert's as well.

Over in the TA lounge, Bel and Isabel were there, talking about -- well, that's an interesting range of subjects -- coffee, powers, kissing, and alcohol. Not all at once, I hope. That could . . . *cough* Yes. Well. Anyhow. Bel also had a talk with Phoebe in the lounge.

In the Crew Berths

Nadia and Parker were in the gym this morning, getting smurfy; Jaye got a package -- no, not that kind, now that I've learned that particular euphemism. My class partner in smurf, Cameron, was watching television in the second floor common room with Molly and a lemur. *pause* Even lemurs like television, apparently. Given that the second floor common room is habitually a den of debauchery, I am hoping like hell that this was not the case tonight. Luckily the fifth floor common room is not so given to vice; that's where Pippi was tonight.

And posters went up today announcing that the kissy event will be taking place after classes tomorrow. I voted. I hope you did too.

In other smurfy news, Callisto and Angel woke up and were smurfy, Aeryn checked in on Cameron who met someone named Scorpius, and I was locked in my room all weekend so I have no idea who that is. Jaye finally got some sleep, and Nadia woke up feeling strange. That sometimes happens after nightmares, as Ivanova had, but waking up was perhaps more pleasant for Logan who is no longer a bunny for the second time. Mister Echolls, do try and stay human from now on? I've given up on Crichton, but there's still hope for you. And no, the lemur that Aeryn encountered was not John Crichton, obviously, as he was a miniature zebra.

*pause and snicker* Always a miniature, John. I wonder about that.

No, Anakin was definitely not happy about his Master coming to visit; I didn't realize that drunken banthabell playing and singing was a Jedi calming technique. I know that now, though. Cally and Samuel discussed the girlkissy poll and yes, Cally, I voted for you.

Among things that were given out, Walter gave Nadia boots, Parker sent email to Jarod, and a lemur gave an email-writing Angela a bite. I hope you're all right, Angela!

Rory was not so all right, though. Would a special hello cheer you up, perhaps? Hello, Rory!

On Shore Leave

GOB was seen at Blood Gulch Arms today. I'm told this is a very bad thing. Jaye was at Sparky Repairs with her laptop and, er, a whore, which reminds me that at the Fourth Sin Jarod was sending email. At Aereopagitica, Parker picked up a video, while Professor Camulus replaced some books of his that had gotten eaten. Honestly, how hungry do you have to be? He was later at Orlin's, though. Orlin, I hope you fed him.

At All and Sundries, Walter was in the women's footwear section, and Ivanova checked in. Speaking of checking, Walter and Orlin both admired the new sculpture in the park, Jaye stared at a whore's chest -- and I have no idea if this was the same whore I mentioned earlier or not -- and Nadia ran into Ivanova while running. Wait. That last bit has nothing to do with checking. But anyhow.

Cafe Fina was sadly empty tonight, but Angela stopped by Caritas, as did I before walking Veronica home after closing, and Nadia, who made lunch plans with Veronica for tomorrow.

And, ladies and gentlemen, that is all the news in our fair town tonight. So this is Archie Kennedy striking colors and signing off for the night, wishing you all a fair wind, clear skies, and the smurfiest smurfiness that ever smurfed your smurf.

Boykissy Radio, April 5

[fates_jaye]

Omg, hi. This is Jaye, now with more sleep! Which is good, as there was YAY BOYKISSY. More on that later.


Edumacation

Shop class is taught by Sam who I could kiss, and Professor Skeeter ditches Journalism. So Not-Crunch doesn't get turned into anything. Aw. Sad cries. Speech works on their webpages, and Magical Theory works on their projects until Macbeth who is too angry to kiss crashes the class.

US Government talks about Supreme Court cases, Celtic Studies takes about some Fiona chick or something, and the Sociology courses do various quiz and paper-related stuff. Math works with factors, Anthropology talks about social stuff... like parties? And Self-Defense Class Not Club works with weapons... or something. Dunno.

Paleontology... holy crap, FEEDS DINOSAURS. Why didn't I hijack that class today? And Driver's Ed rides dinosaurs... Dr. Oliver, I would totally make out with you off the clock. Seriously. Gardening discusses plants in literature, though I don't know if that means their portrayal or if it means tree bark equals paper, but...

Professor Lyman who I wouldn't kiss because he is a teacher and that's wrong if dinosaurs aren't involved, holds office hours, and Angela who I did kiss visits. Professor Dream who is slightly creepy holds office hours, too. And Professor Harrington who I haven't seen, gets a letter from home.

In the library, Zero who I'd kiss and Angela who we covered already talk about food and Marty who I wouldn't kiss because he ships me with a film genre. And then Zero and Peter who I wouldn't kiss if you put a gun to my head or paid me a billion dollars, are cute. And Zero and Parker who's a good kisser talk about a book, and she and Rory who I would kiss if it wouldn't be weird, pass notes, and so do Rory and Angel who I'd kiss if his girlfriend wouldn't squash me like a bug. And Allie is there for an actual book, and can I say that I'd actually kiss Rory despite weirdness if it got us boykissy?


Living Conditions

We still have lemurs. Who sing and dance. Pippi had a couple incidents, and apparently Pip's lemurs are zombies. ...Huh. Moving on to living ones, they Safety Dance to Al's room. And Nadia's cat has to deal with "The Right Stuff". Like... New Kids? Oh my god, that owns. And it's probably a good thing Isabel interrupts Anakin's apparently lemur-induced angst.

Veronica, who I'd kiss except the radio hadn't once reported we did it in an alley, cooks for Nadia, John- who it'd be weird to kiss- and Aeryn- who omg, no- have a bad morning, and Nadia woke up dizzy. Wow, mornings suck.

Logan who I'd probably kiss if he's not a bunny, is cough cough, sick. I'm sure. Angel and Veronica visit. And Pippi seems to see something in the paper good enough to stick on the wall, and Bridgey who I'd kiss interrupts Sam's nap. Oh, Bridgey. You do not interrupt a girl's sleep. Trust me on this.

And Crunch who I've totally kissed a bunch of times sends E-mail, as does Angela. Did I mention I kissed her? She also gets flowers, and hangs with Cameron, where they discuss how confusing girls are. Oh, boys of Fandom, don't fool yourselves. You're just as nuts as we are. Crunch also works out with Pip who I don't know to report on kissing, and Parker. One day I'm going to throw a party in the gym and no one's gonna notice a difference. What, it's a social place where people get sweaty and hit things. See? Party.


Out and About

Lana who I could deal with kissing is early to work, but she's more cheerful today so I'll let her get away with it just this once. And Camulus and Orlin both stop in to see Agatha. Ooh! I will be in for the computer tomorrow, omg! And later she goes to see them. My notes are vague.

At the Perk, Jake who I'd kiss if his boyfriend wouldn't kill me, and Chloe who I'd kiss, arrange a shopping trip with Isabel who I'd kiss. And All and Sundries is open and... Have I met Edmund? I know I know the other guy, but I can't report kissy forecast there. Ivanova who could be kissable visits Edmund, and we just covered him. And Parker goes to Caritas to see Jarod, who I'd totally kiss, too.

At Luke's, Bel and Allie, both kissable, do some studying or something, and Allie also hangs with Nadia, who I'd make out with, and Pippi who I can't comment on as omg, my childhood.

And it was a violent-ass day in town. I'll drop the kissy theme as that's weird in the midst of gore. Unless you're into that. Which I'm not. It's Becky's birthday, and GOB celebrates it by having to go to the FTEC. And there's also something going on behind Luke's that has Weevil taking Allie to the FTEC.

Hm. If I were doing my drinking contest today, I think the explodination of the clinic would warrant a chug. However, alcohol is still icky for a while.


Random Crap that Doesn't Fit Anywhere Else YAY BOYKISSY!!!

And girlkissy, too, but I so don't care.

Before the event, John and Angel think it's weird their girlfriends will be kissing, Crunch tells Angel he's not his type, which... awww. Angel and Cal, who, by the way? I'd so make out with. They're cute. My notes say Kiki propositions Lana, to which I ask... dirty?

Anders brings popcorn, and Crunch... Oh my god, videotaped it for Veronica. V? What do I have to do to get a copy of that? Because I already said I'd make out with you. Nadia and Pippi apparently ignore their surroundings to plan a party and shopping, and Bel introduces Isabel and Piper. I'd make out with Piper, too.

Lana gets drunk. Amazingly, the drunkenness is from a spectator, and not a participant in same-sexkissy. Chloe brought her camera. Chloe? Same offer I gave Veronica. Callisto has to talk Aeryn into kissing her, WTF, Nadia and Angela talk about Marty, and Parker doesn't want to hear about Lana hugging Jarod. Okay, can't be kissing of the Jarod.

And we have the kissy. Angel and Bel seem to do okay, but Logan and Angel? Not so much. Because Logan is cough cough sick, and they're wimps who deprive me of the boykissy. Cally and Kara go for it, Aeryn and Callisto would have been more fun if Aeryn wasn't a loser, and Callisto and Veronica... Okay, that was pretty.



And I realize now that if all you know of me is what you hear on the radio, you probably think I'm a drunken whore. Hey, I didn't say I was going to do it, shhhh. Except in the case of photographic or video evidence of the kissy. On that note, night!