Fandom Radio, Sunday, May the 4th Bw/U

[usedtowhizz.livejournal.com]

Jessica: Welcome to WTFH, Fandom's Pirate Radio Station. This is Jessica Drew, bringing you the news on everything that happened yesterday.

James: No.

Jessica: No what?

James: This is my final broadcast. You don't get to be part of it.

Jessica: Sorry, partner. I bribed the squirrels with rum, so I stay.

James: I could run you out of this radio station before you have time to blink.

Jessica: Try it.

James: Okay*PEW**POW*OW! Geez! Fine! Fine! Ugh, I hate you.

Jessica: That's hurtful. I'm hurt, deep down inside. But on the surface outside, I know it's tim to read the news!

Okay, let's clear out the non-picnic stuff first.

James: Hey, that was my plan. Don't claim it as yours.

Jessica: Too late. Already claimed. Town was pretty quiet, with Dani watching the Kentucky Derby at the Gig, Sholeh, Zeela, and Zhahar leaving via a portal in the park, and Cara moved into her new apartment with Surreal's help.

James: It was better when I used the special bumpers. Like this.

DO--

Jessica: --RMS were also pretty quiet.

James: Ugh. You-- Grrr. Whatever. Joker was back from some trip somewhere and Isabelle had Flick over to spend the night, probably sexily.

Jessica: You don't think it's a little dangerous to just assume that?

James: He started by making out with her forehead. That's a weird foreplay thing. Trust me.

Jessica: Okay, so, I'm going to throw up for the next twenty minutes from the mental image of you doing that to anyone. So why don't you start with the Newbie Picnic?

James: Whatever. So, the picnic happened and new kids met their big siblings. Evan and that dinosaur guy got to deal with Edward from the year 17XX, so that's gonna be fun for them. Barry had zero issues with Cecil's flamingo or explanation of Fandom, which means that Barry is someone to fear. Isabelle and Kailyn compared tattoos. And Alana stopped trying to explain Fandom to Ichabod in order to focus on how the hell he got here. Your turn.

Jessica: Jalian wasn't sure what he was doing in Fandom either, which complicated Vider's explanations. Eleanor tried to be comforting to Anders, who sounded a bit freaked out. And Four and Joker bonded over neglecting their birth names.

Rapunzel seemed well-adjusted after getting the Fandom rundown from Raven, which just makes me proud for my own original little sib.

James: Humblebrag.

Jessica: Shush. Felicity actually meant to come to Fandom, but Loki warned her that there was a tradeoff for a good education. Celia found the weird quirk that Soren was cool with electricity, but not calendars, which makes me wonder about the middleground between those concepts that we call clock radios. Alex surprised Kathy by being a girl, but that was paid back with some Fandom Facts. And Sia did her best to talk down an agitated Nathan, who's apparently not really a 'school person.' Which is a good thing, because I doubt many people could fit inside him for a lecture.

James: Booooooooooooo. And then the new people met each other when they got their roommate assignments. Barry warned Edward that his stuff might explode because of science...

Jessica: That's legit.

James: Yep. Elsa tried sugarcoating Fandom's weirdness to Kaylin. Felcitiy bragged abot her tech to Jalian. And Ichabod and Andros bonded over being from opposite ends of 'really not from this time,' and nothing else.

Rapunzel had a pet chameleon and Anders had magic owers but it sounds like they can both live with that. Alex's gender non-specific name continued to confuse people, but in a good way since Kira found out her roommate was a girl. Nathan couldn't figure out why his name was listed since he didn't mean to come here, but Soren handwaved it away with 'magic' as an answer. ANd Four and Cecil laid some ground rules on roommate behavior.

Jessica: The teachers gathered, just like always, but this time all the newbies were former students. Which is a little bizarre, but hey. Coincidences lik that are going to happen eventually.

Cara didn't seem terribly approachable, which didn't stop her teaching buddy, Jono, from stopping over to give some advice. She was a little more receptive to, um, Surreal stopping over.

James: Teacher's pet!

Jessica: Let's move on quickly before you say something horrible.

James: I just want it known that I am a proud supporter of alternate lifestyles. Even moreso if they let me watch.

Jessica: I'm moving on. Kate knows the drill, so Pinkie Pie's confetti was really just a celebration and not really an introduction. Jono and Hannibal talked about the new kids before moving on to group therapy at the clinic. Jack found Reno, and they talked about her tattoos and his returning to Fandom after so long before Josh got to him to teaching buddy at him about Fandom's changes over the years. Take it.

James: Jack also complimented Cade's shirtlessness since he was playing the part of shirtless mascot. And Cara made it very clear that she appreciated Jack's personality. And by personality--

Jessica: We know what you mean.

James: Yeah, we do. Cecil approached Kenzi to talk about anything but himself, which didn't work out. Here's a hint, kid. If you don't want to talk about yourself, don't talk to your friends. Hang out by yourself and repress. Maybe go to a strip club.

And Kitty and Stiles talked about a Kira who doesn't know him and an other shoe that needs to drop eventually. And then the picnic continued, which whatsherface will tell you about.

Jessica: Thanks. Edward was trying to outdrink a hangover with water, which failed as a plan when he made plans to hit the bar with Anders. Edward suggested that everyone was a bunch of crazy liars, but Rapunzel was cool with things since they were interesting. Barry poked at the potato salad, which inspired Eleanor to ask WTF and eventually made things completely uncomfortable by mistaking something for a filthy joke. Awkward. Joker ended up getting into a "whose universe is weirder" contest with Barry, but the squirrels called the results inconclusive. And Barry told Kathy how he heard about Fandom and decided to come here.

James: Probably because he's a crazy potato salad poker. I'll go. I'm bored with your voice. Seifer dropped off Needful Things fliers, and Kathy made sure it wasn't the porn store. It would be a good name for one. Emma did her usual food stealing thing, which was surprising and inspirational to Four. When Edward tried flirting, she ended up telling him some food information and time travel facts. And Joker pointed out there was free food in the common room, too.

Barry spotted Naga with Korra and was surprised that a polar bear dog was an actual animal. Edward and Isabelle flirted until she got him to bring her cake. And Four figured that Chuck's gloominess was an invitation to talk about what there was to do. Kaylin was stunned by the sheer amount of food, so Barry dropped a 'told you so.' And Flick was off to the side when Isabelle found him and invited him for the sleepover we talked about earlier.

Jessica: And from which I'm changing the topic again because you're creepy. Will tried to explain how things ran on science to Kaylin instead of the magic that she's used to before he and Celia discussed a hypothetical informal class where people explain modern technology to newbies. Sparkle was in a bad mood, so Flick approached him and heard about what recently happened with Atton. Celia stopped by to tell Sparkle that she had a little sib now, and he was more focused on the people leaving than the people coming. And Cade offered him boozy lemonade.

James: Evan read a book with a dinosaur and a dog, which tells me that you should probably stay out of his room. Barry came for the dinosaur and stayed for the discussion of science stuff way above all of your heads. And Eleanor asked about the dinosaur only to find out that he inherited it from some girl who died.

Jessica: Wait, what?

James: Need that repeated? Not a problem because he was also using the past tense to talk about this Gert girl to Joker. Have a friend die, win a dinosaur. I'm gonna suggest that rule the next time the Sinister Syndicate reforms. Oh, you're gonna be quiet for a bit? Fine by me. Cade showed Felicity his abs and told her about Professor Talking Horse. Loki gave Elsa tips on ways to get away with eating with gloves on and Stiles checked with Kira to see if she knew him, but we got that answer earlier.

Eleanor tried to tell Kira that magic is just science we don't understand, and, for the record, that's BS. Magic is crazy, science is awesome. Come on, you're a nerd, chant with me. SCI-ENCE! SCI-ENCE! SCI-... okay, you're not chanting, whatever, you suck. ENCE! Kathy gave Kira the standard "It gets weirder" PSA. And Vider apparently knows Soren because they were hugging and talking about calendars like that's not a crazy thing to do. Here, read, gotta pee. BRB. *PEW*

Jessica: ... Eww. Well, that's one way to get me back to the job at hand. And I hope he washes his when he's done.... Anders and Nathan speculated that their arrivals were an elaborate trap, and Kaylin had to explain to Nathan that even though she doesn't want to be here, she's not a prisoner or anything. So we're in the 'sorry you're stuck with us' portion of the picnic, apparently. Sorry, guys!

Eleanor got to explain how portals work to Nathan, and Vider talked to Nathan about how it's winter where he comes from and he was a bit unprepared for the weather change. Barry asked Alana about her wings. Andros and Anders bonded over having nearly the same name and making this sentence difficult for me. And Isabelle told Anders about the joys of shirtless people at the picnic and told him about a beach party at some future date.

James: Back now. Gimme those notes.

Jessica: Did you wash your hands?

James: Of course. Loki told Rapunzel about the joys of Wiki. Barry checked in on Rapunzel and nerded about about the science - SCI-ENCE! SCI-ENCE! Kathy was thrown by Rapunzel's hair, not literally, she's not Medusa of the Inhumans. And Ichabod was attracted to Celia because of her clothes and she told him about modern days.

Eleanor and Celia also wanted a beach party. Loki introduced Ichabod to himself and the concept of Oklahoma. Kailyn told Ichabod not to be so formal when he tried calling her 'madam.' And Raven gave Ichabod the 'you get used to it' speech before having to explain what genetics are. Here, take the notes.

Jessica: Thanks.

James: Also, I didn't wash my hands.

Jessica: Gah! Keep reading, I'm going to wash my hands and get some rubber gloves.

James: That's what she gets for taking over my show. Loki and Raven compared siblings, both new and old. Barry gawked at Pinkie. And Kaylin found out that Pinkie is a one-pony-corrections-department. And Joker and Eleanor made out.

Jessica: Have some disinfectant. *SPRAY*

James: Great. Now my hands are going to smell like pine tree scent.

Jessica: Deal with it, bucko. Éponine and Kitty hoped for a quiet summer lounging by pools. Kathy and Joker talked about their new little sibs. Barry warned Sia about the potato salad. Kathy asked Soren about his tattoo, and tattoos have been a really common topic of conversation this time. And Kathy and Jalian talked about vegetarianism.

And that's all!

James: Thanks for spoiling my last show. *FEEDBACK* you. *FEEDBACK* each and every one of you squirrels who brought her in like this, which means *FEEDBACK* you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you. And before I leave, just one last reminder for the legal ladies out there. For a good time call 555-SDMN. Speed Demon... out. *PEW*

Jessica: Have a good Sunday, everyone.