fandom_radio | Fandom Radio, Saturday, February 16

Alex: Good morning, Fandom! I’m Alex, and he’s evil, and we’re here to bring you the news! Now if only someone would bring us some doughnuts.

Loki: Or a bagel. I believe I wish to go to New York for one now.

Alex: I miss bagels. Real bagels...how long does it take to get to New York from here?

Loki: If we ask mine brother, not terribly long.

Alex: ...do you think we could send him to get us some bagels?

Loki: We would need to order extra so that they are not devoured--

*angry chittering*

Loki: Alright, alright. We're getting to the notes, dear squirrels. At the school, we have Invasions teamwork and what weaknesses they may possess. Oh, so it is like the Avengers. Only less entertaining. Sex Ed taught the wonders of dancing. I believe a joke is to be made here.

Alex: You should have been there. Half the things Thor said sounded way dirty.

Loki: ...why am I not surprised? Barton's class practiced with targets and candy. They had training dummies that I hope did not look like me and targets in the far distance. Stephanie came upon Hanna who was assualting a bag with great violence and then they discussed breaking of fingers. Barton asked Kate if she had any sort of powers when it came to archery. The answer, it would seem, is no.

Alex: Hawkeye thought someone had to have archery superpowers? Wow. That’s...wow.

Loki: Perhaps Barton was joking. Not that I have ever seen him joke. Though, that may be due to my very presence.

Alex: Could be. In town, Sparkle started his new job at 'Dite's by dancing with that giant metal chicken. Alec was wearing a suit to Wellspring Arms...man, the dress code has really changed. But he couldn't figure out the tie, so he called in some help in the form of Kate. Petra was at Demon Marcus, for people who really like to wait until the last minute to get their dance clothes, and at The Devil's Nest Allie had a special for people who got dumped on Valentine's Day. Because they really needed it. Mike was in a good mood at Caritas, where Laurie thanked him for her flowers and Allie paid a friendly visit from the competition.

Loki: How are they competing? One does not serve those beneath the age of twenty one.

Alex: They’re competing for everyone over the age of twenty-one, though. And I guess sometimes teenagers stumble into the wrong bar.

Loki: Now I feel as though I must try. Drinking to excess has never been something that interested me before, though...

Alex: And you call yourself a Norse god. At the town hall, the Valentine's Day dance featured pterodactyls and helicopters, making this the best Valentine's Day dance ever. People showed up, like Minako, who thanked Jessica for her flowers, and Sia, who wondered if we were ever going to have a normal dance, and also talked to Jessica. Korra and Jackson complimented each other's clothes, but then Jackson told Korra his suit's name and she realized he's a weirdo who names his clothes. Korra also complimented Kate, and then she explained what a bender is to her. Weird, isn't Kate from New York? People there go on benders all the time...anyway.

Loki: Not everyone is Tony Stark. Oh, was that rude?

Alex: I thought it was funny. Olive and Victor wondered what inspires the Student Council to come up with stuff like this. My notes say 'glitter,' and that is correct. Billy and Topher wondered who comes up with this stuff. I just said, the Student Council. We voted for them, remember? It was a thing. Topher told Kate about the time his friend ate glitter. Uh. Did he have sparkly poo? Jessica wanted a skydiving picture from the photographer, and then there were also refreshments. Victor thanked Karolina for the flowers he got for Olive...from her, I guess? I don't know. Atton was hanging out by the punch, so Jessica asked him if he was spiking it. He could have been guarding it, you don't know. He was probably spiking it. Natalie and Peter wondered how long it would be before the punch was spiked. Depends on Atton. Alec and Sparkle talked about shopping and Sparkle's job at the sex shop, and Natalie and Kate talked about whether the punch was spiked, how boring small towns are, and how few couples were really at the Valentine's Day dance. Jessica and Olive discussed what to do in the not so unlikely event that the decorations came to life, while in a poorly lit corner of the room, Natalie and Jace thanked each other for their flowers. With tongue? Maybe not, as this dance was chaperoned by adults like Jack, who asked Kaidan if he had glitter in his hair. The two of them also observed that a lot of kids were at the dance alone. There has been a weird lack of hooking up at this boarding school. Our other responsible adults included Electroclash, who asked Mr. Constantine for a cigarette, leading him to wonder whether, if she lit up and he spiked the punch, they could get kicked out. So scratch that responsible adult part.

Loki: I am certain at least one person there is responsible. Surely.

Alex: One of the other guys was asking about glitter in his hair. I have my doubts.

Loki: There wasn't even the amount of glitter that I had originally wanted. We could have so much more, fellow students!

Alex: Can I suggest just a ‘glitter’ theme for the next dance? It’s where we’re headed anyway.

Loki: It will be awesome and terrific in the most original sense of the words.

Alex: You should totally do that. In the meantime, I still want a bagel.

Loki: And a bagel we shall get. Good morrow, Fandom!