http://slapbetcommish.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] slapbetcommish.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] fandom_radio2010-01-21 09:24 pm

Fandom Radio, Thursday January 21

Barney: I knew you'd be back for more.

Lily: I'm here because we got voted on. What can I say, the people love me.

Barney: And by people, you mean squirrels.

Lily: They love me, too. In no small part because I made them cookies. Check out these babies.

*excited chittering*

Lily: That's right, little guys! They're gourmet, and they are fantastic. Just thought you should know how much we appreciate you and your gossip.

*hand smacking*

Barney: HEY! Share your cookies, little dudes, or I won't share the bottle!

*chittering*

Barney: That's right!

SCHOOL

Barney: We start out with some pretty poor ratings from this squirrel on the outfits Modeling for Dummies showed off on the runway today. While the little suck-ups got ready to strut it for Lady Gremlin, Angela and Hayley critiqued the gremlin outfits. It's the danger shop, people. Critique the teacher's taste instead. Or his taste in lookalike TAs. People Suck Except When They Don't continues to be a strange name for a class when they discuss authority figures...you know, I am one of those now. Loki failed to phone in a guest star favor, I see. Instead he lectured, students compared get out of jail free cards, all while the TAs chatted and Loki cursed under his breath. Or over it, the squirrels are too busy chowing down cookies to clarify. At least he'd also failed to team up with The Perfect Crime where Rick lectured up a storm about the locked room mystery - that's the one where I go in the room with a hot chick and somehow, mysteriously in the middle of the night, I disappear and she wakes up alone, right?

Or a less sexy something about Poe. Get Ricky to explain.

Lily: George wasn't happy with the library being out of order, so he just went and reshelved it. That's it, George! Be an OCD go-getter! Henry wanted to know why the books were out of order, and then they talked about a tea party. I have no idea what that means, but that's okay, I'll let you make your own conclusions. Besides, Karla was there to flirt with George and that's the sort of stuff you all really want to hear.

Steve was actually working on his class in his office hours. I think he was the only one, since Drake spent his looking for movie info online, and Cindy was setting her office up, complete with plant, and Anakin had been working on an e-mail but that was probably happily interrupted by Raven coming by with word on her father. Sirius was trying to figure out how to make fireplaces magically appear, and Paige was reading books. Probably not on making fireplaces appear, though.

DORMS

Lily: I'm just going to swipe this set of notes and start talking before Barney can make the students' lives sound badwrong like last week. After his fight with Jacob in class, Jono came back to his room for some cathartic wall-punching. Ooh. Don't do that. Try it with a pillow instead. Ben tried to make him feel better about the situation, while Kurt was wanting to get back at the guy. Jono wouldn't let him. Good Jono. The squirrels are everywhere. A cookie-filled. Bobby wasn't happy to hear about the fight, Jean was proud that he handled it as well as he did, and Didi came by with hugs. Sounds like he needed them. And on the other side of the drama, Jacob was upset in his room, and Raven came by to see what was wrong, and then she introduced herself. Hey, whatever works.

Barney: See, and I would add in that I'm betting Didi didn't end with the hugs if her boy-toy was sadfacing it up. To which I say bravo, Jono! Way to work the situation to your advantage.

Lily: Zack went to Ino's room to squee about some new monster mission, and guess who gets to come along? If you guessed Ino, you'd be right. Triela complained to her about having to take modeling classes, but I'm still stuck on the monster mission. Triela also paid a visit to Azula, who didn't recognize her, but boy should she be glad no one got stabbed with a pen. By these notes, I'm gonna guess they have a strange relationship.

Aaaand sorry, students, but your dean is going to have to take this bit, because that stack of notes is big and hahahaha no. I claim no responsibility.

Barney: Thanks, Lil. Really. Oh look, it's the squirrel's birthday party!

*exasperated chittering*

Barney: Oh, eat your cookies, who the hell is Ears? Well, happy birthday kid with ears! I hope a stripper popped out of your cake while everyone did that whole stand around and talk thing they do so well here. Mat was only there for the ballpit but Arthur offered up wine and dancing because they're somehow superior. Lies. Laser tag. That is what this party should have had. Jack Priest guessed Mat would rather dance with a girl than with Merlin who guessed who Mat is. Jack Priest was a flirt with Arthur and told Merlin he's legal now. Ah, Merlin with ears, let the debauchery begin. Oh, maybe not. Hannibal and Arthur talked about what a spaz the birthday boy is and then Hannibal talked to him about fish. Arthur kept up his rounds as host, checking in with Blysse and her pooch, who danced with Mat. Yes, all three of them. Together. I'm not asking how it worked, but the squirrels suggest you stop by the Gig like Helen did to ask Blysse. Merlin offered up cake for the duo because it's made...that can't be right. They made it out of meat. And Arthur encouraged Tara to eat it. And Dinah, who didn't mention beef cake to Leda or Jack Priest, but Merlin and Blysse both gleed at Dinah about it. I'm reminded of soylent green here.

Karla was all super polite and creepy at Arthur and it doesn't seem to have had anything to do with disgust over eating people cake because she's chowing down when Leda and Robin and Merlin and Hurley checked up with her. Katchoo brought her clock and didn't rage at Arthur even when she glared at Kennedy, but oh the squirrels drew little hearts here when she gave the birthday boy a hug. Oh the power of the boob squish. Says here Kennedy was stiff with Arthur, heh, stiff, and checked on how the guy treated Tara. Someone ought to post a Hot/Crazy Scale up for these events.

Francine talked sushi with Tara and confirmed Arthur didn't cook with Hurley. Leda, Robin, Helen, and Morgana were festive in their own way. I'm hoping the full-coverage dress on the latter was just a placeholder before she popped from the meat cake?

Okay, fine that was gross even for me. Good thing Tony and Tara can bring it back by worrying about ethics and how Azula and Griff are holding up on that front. Why, did they refuse meat cake? Merlin told Tony how mature he felt today. Roy didn't remember meeting Leda, but the meat cake-eating birthday boy knew him. Jack Priest admitted he wished there were more parties and Roy commented on the lack of RAs. As Dean of Students, I feel I should interject here and point out that WE KNOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING. Ahem. We just don't care.

Hurley and Robin exchanged holiday recovery stories about a month late while Bruce met Leda and Roy. Aravis and Mat were ready to party which was a good plan now that Gunn showed with some real music to get everyone psyched.

...for the terrible sounding food that rightfully scared Mat. But hey, Dinah got the lowdown on the cake from Francine. The claim is that it's meatloaf cake and mashed potato frosting...I'm sorry, why? Oh, Merlin did something glompy at Francine in thanks and then Blysse and the pooch chowed down. Despite his bad taste in food, people still doled out cash to buy Merlin presents and then Helen, Tara, Leda, and Gunn wished him a happy birthday. And then, since there's no laser tag, the kids played in the ballpit and danced off all the beef they just consumed.

Lily: You good? Need water?

Barney: Even better, I've got scotch!

TOWN

Lily: The Arms Hotel was a little on the noisy side, so Hoshi wasn't having a very good time. Jack O'Neill had to battle a kitten during his shift at Diet's, and there's a joke that needs to be made there, but I won't do it because I'm classy. Nathan was doing inventory at Wellspring Arms, Kate hung out with a book and hot chocolate at the Perk, Simon was restless at the clinic, and Millie was picking out what books she wanted to read at Book Haven. Over at the Gig, Helenhad horses, so she was happy. That sounds so wrong.

Barney: In my world, if it sounds wrong, it's gotta be really, really right.

Lily: Ralph got his minions to help Dani Reese with her paperwork at the trooper station, and Pixie Dust had Elena, Karla and Elena discussing what clothes to wear, and whores. Sometimes whores just come up in conversation. Kyle Katarn manned Caritas with Tino, who had a fake beard. Would it be wrong to hope the fake beard had something to do with whores? In a completely 180 in topics, Castiel gave a sermon on forgiveness. Of course, someone, cough cough Arthur and Francine, were busy talking about the party instead. Castiel and Irulan said hello, Didi told him she doesn't feel the need to be forgiven, and I say if you're religious enough to go to church and you don't feel that way, you're not living right. A word of wisdom I should probably not be spouting to impressionable students. Sorry! And Chuck found out that Castiel was going on about the squirrels because his notes had been altered. I'm sure the squirrels themselves had nothing to do with it.

Priestly was good enough to put a squirrel fact sheet up at Luke's, and because Jessi was texting "like an annoying ho" at Atlas, Rose made Dimitri go outside with her to work out. Vida left notes for her staff at Covent Garden, and had Cindy come by to buy a plant, and talk about shoes. Mmm, shoes. Katina was creepily cheerful at Strokes of Genius, and Kennedy jogged around the Magic Box a few times before going in to see Tara. People on this town are way too healthy.

Lindsay dumped water on her dog's head at Stark Industries-

...

Moving on!

So, this bit of notes should be interesting. Geoffrey got himself bitten by a gremlin before rehearsal. People hung out backstage, like Emma, who got to tell Dinah to back off when she started meddling on behalf of Roy. You go, Emma! You should never let another person interfere with your relationships like that.

*clears throat*

Barney: Word.

Lily: Karla and Emma made a shopping date, while Karla and Dinah talked about the messages that went astray a few weeks back, and wondered what was up with Geoffrey. Gemlin bite. Kate and Priestley wondered if Geoffrey's issues were Fandom-related. Yes. Gremlin bite. Karla and Ender talked about some weird Fandom-related occurrences at Stark's, and how they're getting Ben to eat more than ice cream. Ice cream diets are how the freshman 10 happens.

Luckily Jack spoke Portugeuse, so he was able to communicate with the director, and everyone else was probably SOL with their introductions. The crew was hanging out too, where Tony and Dinah talked about the movie from the play, and what was wrong with Geoffrey. say it with me, audience: Gremlin biiite. Very good. I'd give you cookies, but those are for the squirrels. Like this poor squirrel who doesn't speak Portuguese and can't report what Geoffrey and Jack were saying to each other. And Sophie was trying to figure out what was wrong with Geoffrey.

...You know, I can't even imagine. Maybe he was just practicing a character.

And this just in, Everything But the Monkey got a very adorable shipmenet? Was it monkeys? Because if so...

Barney: Ha, I see what you did there. Do you still have Evelyn the cockatoodleroach?

Lily: Cockamouse. And I mostly let Evelyn be Marshall's responsibility, seeing as how I'd still rather not. Which means I'm sure I would have heard about it if we didn't!

Barney: Oh the cockamouse, an insult to squirrels everywhere!

Lily: Not an insult! That's- Ow! HEY. I made that cookie for you, don't throw it at me because of the cockamouse! Okay, know what, I'm getting out of here before I have to throw down with a squirrel.

Barney: Your fault for making the cookies so freaking hard! *thunk* OW! Wait for me!

Lily: No! Hurry!