Fandom Radio, Saturday, June 3, 2006

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

JOHNINA: Hello world! This is Johnina, filling in for my good friend, John Crichton. And I am mah-velous? Do you see my lip gloss? No, of course you don't because I'm on the radio! R-A-D-I-O. I'm also a cheerleader. Thanks Buffster, darlin! And...I have a very special guest!

FRASER: I am not feeling well at all.

JOHNINA: Yes, so I see. Please, Constable, drooling on the pirate's equipment is rule #1 in things Johnina wishes you wouldn't do.

FRASER: I'm going to have to call Ray immediately and tell him his drink of choice is rather vomit inducing.

JOHNINA: Constable, please! This show is all about glamour. Glamour and glitz and looking so damn good it hurts!

FRASER: Are you even a student here?

Hello School, You Are Hot Stuff

JOHNINA: Principal Washburn had office hours today. Professor Tick visited.

FRASER: So lovely...

JOHNINA: Who, Professor Tick? I do agree that blue is a fabulous color on him but...

FRASER: Yes, I mean...wait, no! Not Professor Bluetick!

JOHNINA: Artie held detention today! Molly Hayes, Belthazor, Phoebe Halliwell, Hermione Granger, Paige Matthews, John Conner and Dawn Summers all attend.

FRASER: Let that be a lesson to you, students. Never do...what did you all do again?

JOHNINA: Called Canada bad names?

FRASER: They did what?

Paint the Dorms Yellow With Blue Sparklies!

JOHNINA: In the gym, Pip trains Peter, that dashing English boy, in the skill of hand to hand combat, Aeryn, who is very hot, let me tell you, and Dean spar, and Joxer gets beat up by a girl. Well, when that girl is Callisto, I'm pretty sure we can assume she did the ole one, two, eat my thigh routine, right?

FRASER: Students are fighting?

JOHNINA: Go back to sleep, Constable. And no, Barbossa's hat is not a pillow! Neither are his socks. Oh, and what socks. Barbossa, dear, I'm gonna go shopping tomorrow and get you some new socks, some beautiful socks, some glamorous socks!

FRASER: Ranma turned into a girl again? There are gender change operations occurring and I was not informed?

JOHNINA: How much did you drink?

FRASER:...half a glass.

JOHNINA: Right. Beautiful. At the meerkat cabin *snicker*, Molly's sleeping in mid air and Aeryn, again, very hot and Isabel both look for clothing elsewhere.

FRASER: Sam Winchester apparently had a sleeping partner last night.

JOHNINA: Oh, yay Sam! You're cute and you deserve it!

FRASER: All of you have received instruction on safe sexual practices, correct?

JOHNINA: Eew, not on the radio, Constable. Isabel woke up in the Stickbug cabin and then headed to the dorms, Parker sent an email and Pippi has turned into a cat.

FRASER: What?

JOHNINA: I'm not sure either, actually. But, if you're gonna be a cat, be the best damn cat you can be! Molly and Cam have a serious talk, Jack takes Sam who is a girl to the pool, and Tempe tries to sleep in Aye Aye.

FRASER: Aye aye? You are no sailor.

JOHNINA: You're lucky people think you're cute. And these two are super cute.

FRASER: The Flamingo's had a campfire?

JOHNINA: You're getting ahead of me, Big Red. At the Flamingo campfire, Piper wanted to know what Bel and Veronica were doing in the woods? Maybe they were trying on new clothing. Earth tones, younglings, Earth tones are definitely in! Phoebe would like to know the same thing as Piper.

FRASER: Perhaps they were meditating?

JOHNINA: That's gonna be the new scrapbooking, thanks to you. Tim drops by the Flamingo campfire and Conner passes, apparently on a mission.

FRASER: For what?

JOHNINA: The best pair of Gucci shoes in the world?

FRASER: Does Gucci even makes shoes?

JOHNINA: Look, an elk! But there is no elk around the pool where Jack and Girl Sam had dinner.

FRASER: There's no elk in here!

JOHNINA: At the very busy Meerkat campfire, Isabel talks to Cally about pranks (STICKBUGS RULES!), Alanna comes by and mutters about magic. Alec also meets Faithful.

FRASER: I bet Dief would like to meet Faithful.

JOHNINA: And maybe they could be girlfriend and boyfriend! Jaye tells Isabel about possible Jackkissy, Isabel teaches Alec how to make s'mores, Jaye tells Alec about her night with Jack...

FRASER: There was a sleepover?

JOHNINA: Something like that. Greg and Isabel smooch and, girl, I hope you wore waterproof lipstick! English Peter and Isabel talk about basketball and cheerleading, Isabel and Dean gossip about the Buffster and Sam Winchester, Dawn talks to Dean about Sam Winchester and the Buffster and also meets Tyler.

FRASER: Isn't there homework to do?

JOHNINA: This is our homework?

FRASER: Yes, your homework requires Conner being odd, Tyler and English Peter discussing gnomes and reappearing cabins, Xander, hello Xander, and his ferrett companion, and Parker stopping by. That does not sound like proper school work to me.

JOHNINA: The school's progressive? See, we've got Seras noticing Pippi is looking rather cat like. Meow, baby! Conner is still wandering, Anders sitting next to his campfire and having his cupcakes abused by Conner.

FRASER: It just sounds like you all have very little to do. How do you explain Blair and Phoebe talking about missing the cabins and Belthazor shimmering Lana back to the campsite?

JOHNINA: Practical research, baby! Jack is doing some cooking in the second floor common room. Bel joins him!

FRASER: Is this for a home economics class?

JOHNINA: Sure, it is, darlin! At cheerleading practice, Marie finds out about the invisible cabin (STICKBUGS RULES!) and meets Isabel, D'Anna talks to Marie, Isabel and Buffy talk, Pippi tries to explain to Buffy why she's cat...

FRASER: She's still a cat?

JOHNINA: Nothing's changed in the small amount of time we've been here, Constable. Also at cheerleading, Nadia gets cast as the Gremlin mascot, Jaye and Parker talk about school spirit being a poltergeist, Tyler and English Peter spar using swords.

FRASER: They did that at cheerleading practice?

JOHNINA: The Buffster runs a tight ship! And the Meerkat cabin is back. STICKBUGS RULES!

If There Was a Catwalk, This Town Would Own It!

FRASER: Elle and Kurt talk about seizing the day. My stomach feels like it's seizing right now. Oh, Zoe, thank you kindly for the song dedication.

JOHNINA: You're kinda hung up on the principal, aren't you?

FRASER: Hung up? No, we tend to keep our feet on the ground.

JOHNINA: You're very lucky people think you're cute. Veronica and Cam talk at the Perk, Empire Records is open, and Seras is very hungover at All and Sundries.

FRASER: Stop drinking, students.

JOHNINA: You're not really one to talk, darlin. But, you are cute.

FRASER: You don't have to keep saying that.

JOHNINA: Your loss, Big Red. Paige and Tempe have a date at the Perk and Tim open's Lukes.

JOHNINA: Cafe Fina is open for business!

FRASER: I had my first date there.

JOHNINA: Your...first date ever?

FRASER: What? No, absolutely not. Hello, Zoe. I'm feeling rather ill tonight, I'm afraid.

JOHNINA: She's not here, Constable.

FRASER: Right, of course. I'm feeling rather ill because I had half a glass of something to drink at Caritas where Clark also moped.

JOHNINA: Maybe we should take you to the clinic. The clinic that Alanna opened this morning Tommy Gavin opened that night?

JOHNINA: And that's all we have for you today, my lovelies! Thank you to Constable Fraser for his...part in the broadcast.

FRASER: I feel so ill.

JOHNINA: Good night!