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fandom_radio2008-09-02 11:22 pm
raspberryturk) wrote in fandom_radio2008-09-02 11:22 pm
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Fandom Radio: Tuesday, September 02
Jenny: Hello, Fandom High! I'm Jenny Sparks, this is Reno 'I Don't Need a Stinking Surname,' and this is Booze and News, where the squirrels ply us with rum and we try to tell you what you all got up to today before we pass out. So grab a bottle and try to follow along!
Reno: In honor of the new semester, I propose we turn this broadcast into a drinkin' game, yo. Whenever our good buddy Pepito the censor squirrel saves the day, all you listeners out there in the world outside the station take a swig.
Jenny: But first, a toast to Pepito, without whom you would hear far more swear words every Tuesday.
*clink*
*glug glug*
Jenny: Ah, that's the stuff.
Reno: Agreed, yo. That's [[CENSOR BEEP]]'in good. And if you didn't just take a swig there, then you already lost the game. We got notes?
Jenny: We do indeed have notes. Lots of them. We may be here a while; I hope the squirrels stocked the [[CENSOR BEEP]] liquor cabinet.
Reno: To the notes! Sooner we get 'em done, sooner we can drink ourselves stupid and stumble back to the dorms, yo.
School, Back Again
Reno: Huntin' 101 was all about ghosts today. Nothin' like a liberal dose of dead things while you introduce yourself on the first day, yo. There was talkin' and listenin' to the lecture, as delivered by John. The hunting John, not the one with the hair. You newbies'll learn the difference sooner or later, I'm sure. In Home Ec, there were more intros. I'm stunned, zoto. Lulu was there and Hoshi was the TA, both bein' useful in that around-the-house kinda way. Or somethin'. Hands-On Art did more- wait for it- intros! We're all [[CENSOR BEEP]]'n shocked. Swig! They also did stick figures, which is better'n whatever I can do, so way to go, you artsy-farts. Savannah was in the market for the TA job, too. Ask and ye shall get. Or whatever.
Jenny: In Introductory Superhuman Physics--I just love this school--the students listened to whatever that weird not-French man had to say, then introduced themselves. Ethics class started with discussion because, according to the squirrel, Professor Skywalker is mean. I quite agree with the squirrel there. The students checked each other out instead of listening to the lecture, because they're [[CENSOR BEEP]]ing teenagers, and then answered some long complicated ethical question I won't bore you with because hopefully you're too drunk to answer it anyway. Toby and Ender TA'd it up, and someone named Jan talked to Anakin. At the library, Anemone and Gulliver showed up early to clean, and Robin came by to talk about his summer...it says 'his.' Reno, I think the strange frog child is back.
Reno: For those not yet in the know, the strange frog child is made of felt or somethin' and has a [[CENSOR BEEP]]in' seam runnin' down his face. Just in case you weren't all aware yet that this island attracts freakin' weird students. In office hours today, some dude named Indiana lost the age-old battle between man and computer. I bet he was playin' minesweeper. I suck at that game, too, man. Murdock checked on the new guy and they talked about being displaced from whatever time they're from in a fit of manly bonding, yo. And in a fit of name alliteration, Ino and Indy talked about the Special Collections. Ghanima had office hours too, but she was a little late because there's this whole new chunk of island out there to explore.
Dorms, More Full Than Last Week
Jenny: And here I'd assumed it was an alcohol-induced illusion. In the second floor common room this morning, Tony was sacked out with all the lights on. Scared of the dark, or just too smashed to make it back to his room? You be the judge. Andrew shared Fruity Pebbles and TMI with Tony, and then Cimorene was all cheerful and Lola all German at him, so it doesn't sound like he was having a terrific morning. Particularly if he was hung over. On the third floor, Liir made summer ice, because it is now generally accepted to be fall so that completely makes sense, and Amber stopped by and offered to help with the dishes but wound up chatting with him instead, which is much better than doing the dishes.
Reno: Dishes are boooooring. Chatting is good. Gossip is great. This is why we do radio, yo. That and the booze. In the second floor common room tonight, Ned was bakin' pies. More advice to the newbies, Ned bakes pie. I always manage to miss the pie. More pie for you. Hurley stopped by in an unprecedented invasion of some other floor's common room. For pie. Conversation about time travel, people from space, and havin' a flavor ensued. Susan and Hurley had a moment or somethin', where she worried that his ma' was lonely, and he assurred her she was fine. We are, needless to say, all relieved, yo. Molly stopped by for the pie, and she and Ned bonded over not bein' weapons-users. Hey! There ain't nothing [[CENSOR BEEP]]in wrong with bein' a weapon user, yo! -Swig.
*glug glug*
Jenny: Harry stopped by because he smelled pie, and Hurley wondered if people were tasting each other. Um, no, no cannibals here, 'kay thanks. Unless you are a cannibal, in which case I don't really want to know, or to be eaten. Just putting that out there. Ned told Liz nothing has attacked him today--yet--and Tosh thought the pie smelled good. Of course it does, it's [[CENSOR BEEP]]ing pie. Drink!
*glug glug*
Jenny: Hurley told Tosh Ned was awesome, presumably because he provides pie, and Molly asked Tosh how classes were going. Tosh geeked out about physics, Molly about something with magical creatures and forget pie,I smell nerds. Penelope was worried about whether there were rules, hahaha as if, and she might not be allowed in this common room, but Ned plied her with sugary goodness. Susan wondered if Penelope might be from the desert from some reason, but, no, she's from England, which I can say with some authority does not have a desert. Myn was surprised by the kitchen, and backtracking a bit, when Susan first arrived, she hoped there would be pie. And there was! Funny how that works when that Ned chap's around, eh? In non-common room happenings, Turtle was emo and this is news.
Reno: Stocks must be down or somethin'. Which is news if you gamble on the stock market. I guess. And Jen sent an e-mail so uber-secret that we're reportin' it on the news. Very uber. Clearly.
Town: Still There
Reno: In town, Abby Irene was all happy that Mary was back in town. She wasn't so happy at her mail, though. Mail sucks. Bet it was bills. At Turtle & Canary, G'Kar- gezundheit- was bein' all friendly-like at the newbies, yo. That don't explain why Turtle was emo. I figured havin' a friendly alien dude runnin' the place would be good for business. Huh. At The Perk, Ino was readin' a scroll and bein' grumpy about radio. Not our broadcast, I hope? I ain't said your name wrong in ages, Ino! Hurley was there with some hot chocolate, and he talked to Ino about the scroll. And a unicorn. ... Seriously? There's a [[CENSOR BEEP]]in' unicorn? Ichigo was there without talk about the unicorn, but he demanded that Ino give him back his shirt. Good luck, man. You'll need it, yo.
Jenny: Cable came in for some coffee and refused to sit and chat, because he's a snob, and Temari wrote a letter home when she should have been working. Girl after my own heart, that one. Myn was confused about the presence of a meditation center at an armory, and to that all I can say is, 'Welcome to Fandom.' Ender also came in, due to curiosity. At the Boards: more casting! Amber came in to tap dance, which is not something I remember in any of the plays of Shakespeare, so perhaps this is a new and novel interpretation. Turtle auditioned but did not get a part.
*pause*
Jenny: Okay, listen, Mr. Director Man, if you want to get this thing moving along some time this century I advise you actually cast the people who try out. I know, I know, it's a novel concept, but it might just work! The strange frog child auditioned and was cast, so clearly Mr. Tennant has no problem with felt. Cal wanted to switch roles, and Tony was hired as the stage manager.
Reno: At Atlas Gym, Murdock and Amber did their usual sparring thing. There's somethin' I haven't done in a while- just sparrin'. Any butt-kickers out there? I get bored, yo. At Café Fina, it was Lion-o-who-really-is-a-cat-thing's first day. There were cookies. Mary was workin' at the Arms Hotel in a bustier, and Millie was hirin' at the Book Haven. Hinata stopped in for a job. Good job for Hina, I'm thinkin'. Minsc and his hamster, Boo, were out walkin' in the park, where our fine fuzzy radio minions chased the hamster around. Squirrels, guys, I don't think Boo's your type, yo. Jeff's dog, Nana, was out of control, but Minsc saved the day. And at Groovy Tunes, Alice was listenin' to new music. Which is a relative term, I guess, with a girl from the past, ain't it?
Jenny: Yes, 'new' could be from the sixties, I would think. Lot of good music in the sixties...I digress. The apartment complex has a new manager, and lo his name is Rusty. Welcome to crazy town, Rusty. I hope you weren't terribly attached to your ideas of how things like 'physics' work. Nathan stopped by to ask if he needed a hand, and Harley came by looking for an apartment. G'Kar also stopped by to have a nice chat, and some people with terribly unpronounceable names, but I'll try--Amateras--no. Ameratsu and Issun. Yes. Them. I'm going to call them Amy and Izzy from now on. Amy and Izzy stopped by, acting lost. And Sam came by with a huge box of stuff. Hopefully Rusty offered to carry it for her, it's the only polite thing to do.
Reno: I think people out there are too sober. Allow me a brief interlude to make this more interestin', yo. *Deep breath* [[CENSOR BEEP]], [[CENSOR BEEP]], [[CENSOR BEEP]], [[CENSOR BEEP]]. And a little more [[CENSOR BEEP]] for good measure. There, the rest of the island'll be set for the report on the best bar on the island, Caritas. They don't card, new kids! Marshall was beatin' Tino at Indian Poker tonight, yo. Amber came in and introduced herself. Apparently she's got a real good eye or some sorta mental problem, because she managed to recognize him as a pineapple she saw earlier. Buffy recognized Amber from Home Ec class, which might have had pineapples, but I dunno, and then she ordered a coke and talked to Marshall about livin' dangerously. If you're a pineapple, workin' in a place that serves pina coladas is dangerous livin' indeed. Harley stopped in an ordered himself a girly drink, so the pineapple man made him somethin' pretty good. And at the clinic, the daytime was watched by a nurse, and Doogie was there in the evenin'. No pineapples were harmed seriously enough to get taken in, so we know that Marshall didn't get eaten tonight, yo.
Jenny: If I harmed a pineapple I wouldn't take it to the clinic, that's for [[CENSOR BEEP]] sure.
Reno: I might. Depends on how drunk I am and if there's some rum and coconut around, yo.
Jenny: There's always rum arou--actually we're running kind of low. THIS WILL NEVER DO.
Reno: Our rodents ain't tryin' hard enough! Little [[CENSOR BEEPS]] musta been distracted by hot hamster action in the park! Guys!
Jenny: You know the cabinet has to be stocked on our night! What were you [[CENSOR BEEP]]ing thinking??
*chitter*
Jenny: 'You need to drink less?'
....
Reno: Anybody know how to check for a fever on a squirrel? I think they're not in their right minds, yo.
Jenny: I will give them points for bravery, though. Come on, Reno. I've got a fresh bottle waiting to be killed back at the dorm. [[CENSOR BEEP]]ing [[CENSOR BEEP]]er stingy squirrels, who needs them?
Reno: Not I! To the booze, yo!
Jenny: Just a reminder, dear listeners, this has been Not Nearly Enough Booze and Lots of News with Jenny and Reno, and don't forget to cast your vote for us when it comes to it. You know you love us. To the booze!
Reno: If you don't love us, give us booze anyhow. Good night, Fandom!
Reno: In honor of the new semester, I propose we turn this broadcast into a drinkin' game, yo. Whenever our good buddy Pepito the censor squirrel saves the day, all you listeners out there in the world outside the station take a swig.
Jenny: But first, a toast to Pepito, without whom you would hear far more swear words every Tuesday.
*clink*
*glug glug*
Jenny: Ah, that's the stuff.
Reno: Agreed, yo. That's [[CENSOR BEEP]]'in good. And if you didn't just take a swig there, then you already lost the game. We got notes?
Jenny: We do indeed have notes. Lots of them. We may be here a while; I hope the squirrels stocked the [[CENSOR BEEP]] liquor cabinet.
Reno: To the notes! Sooner we get 'em done, sooner we can drink ourselves stupid and stumble back to the dorms, yo.
School, Back Again
Reno: Huntin' 101 was all about ghosts today. Nothin' like a liberal dose of dead things while you introduce yourself on the first day, yo. There was talkin' and listenin' to the lecture, as delivered by John. The hunting John, not the one with the hair. You newbies'll learn the difference sooner or later, I'm sure. In Home Ec, there were more intros. I'm stunned, zoto. Lulu was there and Hoshi was the TA, both bein' useful in that around-the-house kinda way. Or somethin'. Hands-On Art did more- wait for it- intros! We're all [[CENSOR BEEP]]'n shocked. Swig! They also did stick figures, which is better'n whatever I can do, so way to go, you artsy-farts. Savannah was in the market for the TA job, too. Ask and ye shall get. Or whatever.
Jenny: In Introductory Superhuman Physics--I just love this school--the students listened to whatever that weird not-French man had to say, then introduced themselves. Ethics class started with discussion because, according to the squirrel, Professor Skywalker is mean. I quite agree with the squirrel there. The students checked each other out instead of listening to the lecture, because they're [[CENSOR BEEP]]ing teenagers, and then answered some long complicated ethical question I won't bore you with because hopefully you're too drunk to answer it anyway. Toby and Ender TA'd it up, and someone named Jan talked to Anakin. At the library, Anemone and Gulliver showed up early to clean, and Robin came by to talk about his summer...it says 'his.' Reno, I think the strange frog child is back.
Reno: For those not yet in the know, the strange frog child is made of felt or somethin' and has a [[CENSOR BEEP]]in' seam runnin' down his face. Just in case you weren't all aware yet that this island attracts freakin' weird students. In office hours today, some dude named Indiana lost the age-old battle between man and computer. I bet he was playin' minesweeper. I suck at that game, too, man. Murdock checked on the new guy and they talked about being displaced from whatever time they're from in a fit of manly bonding, yo. And in a fit of name alliteration, Ino and Indy talked about the Special Collections. Ghanima had office hours too, but she was a little late because there's this whole new chunk of island out there to explore.
Dorms, More Full Than Last Week
Jenny: And here I'd assumed it was an alcohol-induced illusion. In the second floor common room this morning, Tony was sacked out with all the lights on. Scared of the dark, or just too smashed to make it back to his room? You be the judge. Andrew shared Fruity Pebbles and TMI with Tony, and then Cimorene was all cheerful and Lola all German at him, so it doesn't sound like he was having a terrific morning. Particularly if he was hung over. On the third floor, Liir made summer ice, because it is now generally accepted to be fall so that completely makes sense, and Amber stopped by and offered to help with the dishes but wound up chatting with him instead, which is much better than doing the dishes.
Reno: Dishes are boooooring. Chatting is good. Gossip is great. This is why we do radio, yo. That and the booze. In the second floor common room tonight, Ned was bakin' pies. More advice to the newbies, Ned bakes pie. I always manage to miss the pie. More pie for you. Hurley stopped by in an unprecedented invasion of some other floor's common room. For pie. Conversation about time travel, people from space, and havin' a flavor ensued. Susan and Hurley had a moment or somethin', where she worried that his ma' was lonely, and he assurred her she was fine. We are, needless to say, all relieved, yo. Molly stopped by for the pie, and she and Ned bonded over not bein' weapons-users. Hey! There ain't nothing [[CENSOR BEEP]]in wrong with bein' a weapon user, yo! -Swig.
*glug glug*
Jenny: Harry stopped by because he smelled pie, and Hurley wondered if people were tasting each other. Um, no, no cannibals here, 'kay thanks. Unless you are a cannibal, in which case I don't really want to know, or to be eaten. Just putting that out there. Ned told Liz nothing has attacked him today--yet--and Tosh thought the pie smelled good. Of course it does, it's [[CENSOR BEEP]]ing pie. Drink!
*glug glug*
Jenny: Hurley told Tosh Ned was awesome, presumably because he provides pie, and Molly asked Tosh how classes were going. Tosh geeked out about physics, Molly about something with magical creatures and forget pie,I smell nerds. Penelope was worried about whether there were rules, hahaha as if, and she might not be allowed in this common room, but Ned plied her with sugary goodness. Susan wondered if Penelope might be from the desert from some reason, but, no, she's from England, which I can say with some authority does not have a desert. Myn was surprised by the kitchen, and backtracking a bit, when Susan first arrived, she hoped there would be pie. And there was! Funny how that works when that Ned chap's around, eh? In non-common room happenings, Turtle was emo and this is news.
Reno: Stocks must be down or somethin'. Which is news if you gamble on the stock market. I guess. And Jen sent an e-mail so uber-secret that we're reportin' it on the news. Very uber. Clearly.
Town: Still There
Reno: In town, Abby Irene was all happy that Mary was back in town. She wasn't so happy at her mail, though. Mail sucks. Bet it was bills. At Turtle & Canary, G'Kar- gezundheit- was bein' all friendly-like at the newbies, yo. That don't explain why Turtle was emo. I figured havin' a friendly alien dude runnin' the place would be good for business. Huh. At The Perk, Ino was readin' a scroll and bein' grumpy about radio. Not our broadcast, I hope? I ain't said your name wrong in ages, Ino! Hurley was there with some hot chocolate, and he talked to Ino about the scroll. And a unicorn. ... Seriously? There's a [[CENSOR BEEP]]in' unicorn? Ichigo was there without talk about the unicorn, but he demanded that Ino give him back his shirt. Good luck, man. You'll need it, yo.
Jenny: Cable came in for some coffee and refused to sit and chat, because he's a snob, and Temari wrote a letter home when she should have been working. Girl after my own heart, that one. Myn was confused about the presence of a meditation center at an armory, and to that all I can say is, 'Welcome to Fandom.' Ender also came in, due to curiosity. At the Boards: more casting! Amber came in to tap dance, which is not something I remember in any of the plays of Shakespeare, so perhaps this is a new and novel interpretation. Turtle auditioned but did not get a part.
*pause*
Jenny: Okay, listen, Mr. Director Man, if you want to get this thing moving along some time this century I advise you actually cast the people who try out. I know, I know, it's a novel concept, but it might just work! The strange frog child auditioned and was cast, so clearly Mr. Tennant has no problem with felt. Cal wanted to switch roles, and Tony was hired as the stage manager.
Reno: At Atlas Gym, Murdock and Amber did their usual sparring thing. There's somethin' I haven't done in a while- just sparrin'. Any butt-kickers out there? I get bored, yo. At Café Fina, it was Lion-o-who-really-is-a-cat-thing's first day. There were cookies. Mary was workin' at the Arms Hotel in a bustier, and Millie was hirin' at the Book Haven. Hinata stopped in for a job. Good job for Hina, I'm thinkin'. Minsc and his hamster, Boo, were out walkin' in the park, where our fine fuzzy radio minions chased the hamster around. Squirrels, guys, I don't think Boo's your type, yo. Jeff's dog, Nana, was out of control, but Minsc saved the day. And at Groovy Tunes, Alice was listenin' to new music. Which is a relative term, I guess, with a girl from the past, ain't it?
Jenny: Yes, 'new' could be from the sixties, I would think. Lot of good music in the sixties...I digress. The apartment complex has a new manager, and lo his name is Rusty. Welcome to crazy town, Rusty. I hope you weren't terribly attached to your ideas of how things like 'physics' work. Nathan stopped by to ask if he needed a hand, and Harley came by looking for an apartment. G'Kar also stopped by to have a nice chat, and some people with terribly unpronounceable names, but I'll try--Amateras--no. Ameratsu and Issun. Yes. Them. I'm going to call them Amy and Izzy from now on. Amy and Izzy stopped by, acting lost. And Sam came by with a huge box of stuff. Hopefully Rusty offered to carry it for her, it's the only polite thing to do.
Reno: I think people out there are too sober. Allow me a brief interlude to make this more interestin', yo. *Deep breath* [[CENSOR BEEP]], [[CENSOR BEEP]], [[CENSOR BEEP]], [[CENSOR BEEP]]. And a little more [[CENSOR BEEP]] for good measure. There, the rest of the island'll be set for the report on the best bar on the island, Caritas. They don't card, new kids! Marshall was beatin' Tino at Indian Poker tonight, yo. Amber came in and introduced herself. Apparently she's got a real good eye or some sorta mental problem, because she managed to recognize him as a pineapple she saw earlier. Buffy recognized Amber from Home Ec class, which might have had pineapples, but I dunno, and then she ordered a coke and talked to Marshall about livin' dangerously. If you're a pineapple, workin' in a place that serves pina coladas is dangerous livin' indeed. Harley stopped in an ordered himself a girly drink, so the pineapple man made him somethin' pretty good. And at the clinic, the daytime was watched by a nurse, and Doogie was there in the evenin'. No pineapples were harmed seriously enough to get taken in, so we know that Marshall didn't get eaten tonight, yo.
Jenny: If I harmed a pineapple I wouldn't take it to the clinic, that's for [[CENSOR BEEP]] sure.
Reno: I might. Depends on how drunk I am and if there's some rum and coconut around, yo.
Jenny: There's always rum arou--actually we're running kind of low. THIS WILL NEVER DO.
Reno: Our rodents ain't tryin' hard enough! Little [[CENSOR BEEPS]] musta been distracted by hot hamster action in the park! Guys!
Jenny: You know the cabinet has to be stocked on our night! What were you [[CENSOR BEEP]]ing thinking??
*chitter*
Jenny: 'You need to drink less?'
....
Reno: Anybody know how to check for a fever on a squirrel? I think they're not in their right minds, yo.
Jenny: I will give them points for bravery, though. Come on, Reno. I've got a fresh bottle waiting to be killed back at the dorm. [[CENSOR BEEP]]ing [[CENSOR BEEP]]er stingy squirrels, who needs them?
Reno: Not I! To the booze, yo!
Jenny: Just a reminder, dear listeners, this has been Not Nearly Enough Booze and Lots of News with Jenny and Reno, and don't forget to cast your vote for us when it comes to it. You know you love us. To the booze!
Reno: If you don't love us, give us booze anyhow. Good night, Fandom!
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