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fandom_radio2008-02-25 11:32 pm
stocksgrrl.livejournal.com) wrote in fandom_radio2008-02-25 11:32 pm
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Fandom Radio :: Monday, February 25th.
Turtle: *spoken very quietly* Good evening, Fandom. You're listening to WTFH radio, brought to you tonight, as always on Mondays these days, by me, Turtle Wexler, and my boyfriend-slash-cohost Jeff Murdock. If you're wondering why I'm speaking so quietly, it's because I want you to listen very, very carefully, for just a moment. Do you hear that sound? *long pause* Do you know what that sound is? That sound is the majestic call of the great Canadian moose, Alces alces. Isn't it beautiful? Do you know why I'm making you listen to a moose right now?
*longer pause*
Turtle: *much louder* BECAUSE THEY'RE FREAKING EVERYWHERE! We're broadcasting right now from a transistor radio. In freaking Canada.
Jeff: Turtle? I think the squirrels came here on mooseback.
Turtle: That would explain why we have notes even though we're in freaking Canada. Very resourceful, those squirrels. Who now kind of have a delicate aroma to them, a soft, gentle mix of bacon and maple syrup....
Jeff: I'm still quite fond of the bacon tea, but you really shouldn't have added the syrup. I think that put it a bit over the top.
Turtle: Don't even get me started on the bacon tea. Let's just start the notes; the mooses are giving suspicious looks at them, and I fear that they'll start eating them before we can read them.
SCHOOL, of which there is none because it's SPRING BREAK, WOOOO
Jeff: There's not even a flirtary today. It feels a bit odd. ...Was that a wolf?
Turtle: ....for the sake of not being scared out of my wits tonight, I'm going to say no. There weren't any classes, or flirtary, but there was a meeting of the Martial Arts Club. It was kind of watered down, though, what with everyone being on SPRING BREAK, WOOOO. There was a bit of sparring, though, and Mister Biff did his adviser things, too.
Jeff: It's Spring Break already? I was supposed to phone my mother! Now she's going to phone me when I get home!
Turtle: You should do it when we're done with broadcast. And make her talk to a moose. Meanwhile, the office closed for the week, and continues to be moose-free. Because all the mooses are right here, trying to eat my no-- HEY.
Jeff: Tell the squirrel to stop wriggling about!
Turtle: It can't help it, surrounded by all these mooses.
Jeff: Just make certain to hold on to your hat.
DORMS, where most of us live, but not so much today because of SPRING BREAK, WOOOO
Turtle: In uneaten notes, we have Jaina making some annoyed phone ca-- Hey. Moose! Stop eating my notes, or, I swear, I will stop being nice and do to you what I came here to do.
Jeff: Sky goes for a bit of a run, while John attempts to convince Rodney to go to Mexico 'cos there's blondes in bikinis. ... ... Did you ever end up buying that bikini, Turtle?
Turtle: No, not yet, but I will, hold your horses. Yeesh.
Jeff: Have you ever considered being blonde?
Turtle: NO. Have you ever considered being single again? Because you might, if you keep on this line of thought, Jeff, instead of just keep on reading those notes.
Jeff: ...Nevermind, I didn't say anything about blondes, they're very-- less good than brunettes. Er, Sokka comes in to John's and is surprised that John knows Rodney. Apparently it's 'cos they had babies together, which really does make the knowing part a bit obvious, I feel.
TOWN, where stuff happens, even on SPRING BREAK, WOOOOO
Turtle: In going-ons about town today, we had Sheriff Mustang finished packing his bags and Miss Aly shows up to ask about what held him up from leaving earlier. Was it mooses? I'll bet it was mooses. It would figure that Jeff and I wind up all the way in Canada, and then mooses show up. Also, Reno was leaving on a chopper, which is not as melodic as leaving on a jet plane.
Jeff: It does lack a certain ring. Troy and Sky have a date! I mean, a not date. You have to differentiate these things, 'cos in Fandom, you've got dates and not dates, snogging and not snogging, UST and no UST, and the general workings of these issues are a bit complicated. I'm always terrified that if I use the wrong prefix I might end up chased across the studio in my underwear. There's a squirrel in the park waiting for his Tail-A, and oh, Punk Squirrel, you really have to be careful there, the entire human-squirrel dating scene seems like it has a lot of potential pitfalls. ...I hope you don't confer with Blonde Squirrel on that. Don't listen to anything she says! Tail-- I mean, Teyla gets there, and that dog gets a bit confused by the writing squirrel. You get used to it.
Turtle: Way too used to it.
Jeff: Lucas does that thing where he opens Wonders of the World, and then Sokka does that thing where he's entirely oblivious to the nature of things or the existence of places. You have to be careful with that, you don't want to end up in Canada and get struck by a nudist moose.Then there's a couple of people doing that opening thing-- Breasts opens the hotel, George Michael has his bananas, Annette with the lungs has the post office, Yeehtsahk has his diner, Seregil's got his books, and a Ronan coming in to buy a couple on linguistics and quantum... stuff, Alex hasn't got a baby egg but a magic box, watch out, Chad has his music and Tom has his pizzas!
Turtle: Detective Montoya womanned the Trooper Station today, and Agent Cooper asked for her assistance on some old cases. I highly doubt it involved Braidgate '07, because, really, that one was pretty open-and-shut. Mister Gabriel talked at the ceiling in the church, and I don't think I want to know what Jamie is doing over at Turtle & Canary in my absence. Pixie Dust was pretty busy for Romeo today -- ugh -- in lieu of spring break. Everyone needs new clothes, I guess. Overpriced ones. John with the hair is looking for beach stuff, which makes sense, what with going to Mexico. Which is the opposite of Canada. Rikku wonders if Romeo's still going to Florida, which he isn't. Mexico instead, and Rikku thinks about going. River picked up something for her brother, which was rather nice of her, I guess, and Mel needs stuff for break, too. So does Amber, who should know better because she gets a discount at Turtle & Canary anyway. Sokka, too. What happened to employee loyalty? Honestly?
Jeff: It's Sokka. You can't trust him!
Turtle: Nope, not a bit. Anyway, Naomi also opened Sparky's today, and JacK stopped in to chat her up. There was no one chatting Mister Cable up, though, at the Wellspring Arms and Meditation Center, but he never really struck me as much of a chatty guy, anyway.
Jeff: Sometimes I wake up and wish I was more like mister Cable, he seems like he doesn't have as much trouble keeping his things together.
Turtle: I'd rather you weren't. Then you'd be way too ridiculously tall, and my neck would hurt all the time.
Jeff: At Caritas, Jolee is sleeping. I tried to sleep last night but I couldn't, even if Turtle's blocking the tent opening now in case of any potential nudist invaders. Also, nurses. ...Nurses. And Katara later. Then Xander wakes up with Bridge, who, for the record, is now back to being a human being. Welcome, I hope you didn't ingest anything while you were an animal. And then Renee finds a naked man in her-- TURTLE! I knew there were nudists around!
Turtle: Around in Fandom, but not here. I told you, Jeff, it's too cold for nudists to be here.
Jeff: You don't know that. They might be lurking.
Turtle: Trust me, Jeff. They're not lurking. Because it's got to be pretty hard to lurk when you're frozen to death. Either way, either we've finished all the notes already, or the mooses have eaten all the other notes, but, man, that was quick. I didn't even get a chance to say a lot of words like colour or favourite with lots of excessive us in them.... I still, however, have not gotten Let's Go To the Mall out of my head since we heard it in that diner. It's driving me crazy.
*incredible amounts of noise*
Jeff: ...Turtle? I think one of the mooses just toppled! Kick it! Quickly! Kick it!
Turtle: Wait, wha-- *slight sound of flailing panic and then the dull sound of what might be a kick* ...ow.
Jeff: ...We need a nurse!
Turtle: No, we don't. That just...it didn't even move! Did you see that? These mooses are tou-- *another sound of kicking* Ha! That one got a twitch, I think. I think...uh-oh. I think we better go back to the tent, Jeff. Like....now.
*static... click... silence*
[[ no mooses were harmed in the making of this radio. ]]
*longer pause*
Turtle: *much louder* BECAUSE THEY'RE FREAKING EVERYWHERE! We're broadcasting right now from a transistor radio. In freaking Canada.
Jeff: Turtle? I think the squirrels came here on mooseback.
Turtle: That would explain why we have notes even though we're in freaking Canada. Very resourceful, those squirrels. Who now kind of have a delicate aroma to them, a soft, gentle mix of bacon and maple syrup....
Jeff: I'm still quite fond of the bacon tea, but you really shouldn't have added the syrup. I think that put it a bit over the top.
Turtle: Don't even get me started on the bacon tea. Let's just start the notes; the mooses are giving suspicious looks at them, and I fear that they'll start eating them before we can read them.
SCHOOL, of which there is none because it's SPRING BREAK, WOOOO
Jeff: There's not even a flirtary today. It feels a bit odd. ...Was that a wolf?
Turtle: ....for the sake of not being scared out of my wits tonight, I'm going to say no. There weren't any classes, or flirtary, but there was a meeting of the Martial Arts Club. It was kind of watered down, though, what with everyone being on SPRING BREAK, WOOOO. There was a bit of sparring, though, and Mister Biff did his adviser things, too.
Jeff: It's Spring Break already? I was supposed to phone my mother! Now she's going to phone me when I get home!
Turtle: You should do it when we're done with broadcast. And make her talk to a moose. Meanwhile, the office closed for the week, and continues to be moose-free. Because all the mooses are right here, trying to eat my no-- HEY.
Jeff: Tell the squirrel to stop wriggling about!
Turtle: It can't help it, surrounded by all these mooses.
Jeff: Just make certain to hold on to your hat.
DORMS, where most of us live, but not so much today because of SPRING BREAK, WOOOO
Turtle: In uneaten notes, we have Jaina making some annoyed phone ca-- Hey. Moose! Stop eating my notes, or, I swear, I will stop being nice and do to you what I came here to do.
Jeff: Sky goes for a bit of a run, while John attempts to convince Rodney to go to Mexico 'cos there's blondes in bikinis. ... ... Did you ever end up buying that bikini, Turtle?
Turtle: No, not yet, but I will, hold your horses. Yeesh.
Jeff: Have you ever considered being blonde?
Turtle: NO. Have you ever considered being single again? Because you might, if you keep on this line of thought, Jeff, instead of just keep on reading those notes.
Jeff: ...Nevermind, I didn't say anything about blondes, they're very-- less good than brunettes. Er, Sokka comes in to John's and is surprised that John knows Rodney. Apparently it's 'cos they had babies together, which really does make the knowing part a bit obvious, I feel.
TOWN, where stuff happens, even on SPRING BREAK, WOOOOO
Turtle: In going-ons about town today, we had Sheriff Mustang finished packing his bags and Miss Aly shows up to ask about what held him up from leaving earlier. Was it mooses? I'll bet it was mooses. It would figure that Jeff and I wind up all the way in Canada, and then mooses show up. Also, Reno was leaving on a chopper, which is not as melodic as leaving on a jet plane.
Jeff: It does lack a certain ring. Troy and Sky have a date! I mean, a not date. You have to differentiate these things, 'cos in Fandom, you've got dates and not dates, snogging and not snogging, UST and no UST, and the general workings of these issues are a bit complicated. I'm always terrified that if I use the wrong prefix I might end up chased across the studio in my underwear. There's a squirrel in the park waiting for his Tail-A, and oh, Punk Squirrel, you really have to be careful there, the entire human-squirrel dating scene seems like it has a lot of potential pitfalls. ...I hope you don't confer with Blonde Squirrel on that. Don't listen to anything she says! Tail-- I mean, Teyla gets there, and that dog gets a bit confused by the writing squirrel. You get used to it.
Turtle: Way too used to it.
Jeff: Lucas does that thing where he opens Wonders of the World, and then Sokka does that thing where he's entirely oblivious to the nature of things or the existence of places. You have to be careful with that, you don't want to end up in Canada and get struck by a nudist moose.Then there's a couple of people doing that opening thing-- Breasts opens the hotel, George Michael has his bananas, Annette with the lungs has the post office, Yeehtsahk has his diner, Seregil's got his books, and a Ronan coming in to buy a couple on linguistics and quantum... stuff, Alex hasn't got a baby egg but a magic box, watch out, Chad has his music and Tom has his pizzas!
Turtle: Detective Montoya womanned the Trooper Station today, and Agent Cooper asked for her assistance on some old cases. I highly doubt it involved Braidgate '07, because, really, that one was pretty open-and-shut. Mister Gabriel talked at the ceiling in the church, and I don't think I want to know what Jamie is doing over at Turtle & Canary in my absence. Pixie Dust was pretty busy for Romeo today -- ugh -- in lieu of spring break. Everyone needs new clothes, I guess. Overpriced ones. John with the hair is looking for beach stuff, which makes sense, what with going to Mexico. Which is the opposite of Canada. Rikku wonders if Romeo's still going to Florida, which he isn't. Mexico instead, and Rikku thinks about going. River picked up something for her brother, which was rather nice of her, I guess, and Mel needs stuff for break, too. So does Amber, who should know better because she gets a discount at Turtle & Canary anyway. Sokka, too. What happened to employee loyalty? Honestly?
Jeff: It's Sokka. You can't trust him!
Turtle: Nope, not a bit. Anyway, Naomi also opened Sparky's today, and JacK stopped in to chat her up. There was no one chatting Mister Cable up, though, at the Wellspring Arms and Meditation Center, but he never really struck me as much of a chatty guy, anyway.
Jeff: Sometimes I wake up and wish I was more like mister Cable, he seems like he doesn't have as much trouble keeping his things together.
Turtle: I'd rather you weren't. Then you'd be way too ridiculously tall, and my neck would hurt all the time.
Jeff: At Caritas, Jolee is sleeping. I tried to sleep last night but I couldn't, even if Turtle's blocking the tent opening now in case of any potential nudist invaders. Also, nurses. ...Nurses. And Katara later. Then Xander wakes up with Bridge, who, for the record, is now back to being a human being. Welcome, I hope you didn't ingest anything while you were an animal. And then Renee finds a naked man in her-- TURTLE! I knew there were nudists around!
Turtle: Around in Fandom, but not here. I told you, Jeff, it's too cold for nudists to be here.
Jeff: You don't know that. They might be lurking.
Turtle: Trust me, Jeff. They're not lurking. Because it's got to be pretty hard to lurk when you're frozen to death. Either way, either we've finished all the notes already, or the mooses have eaten all the other notes, but, man, that was quick. I didn't even get a chance to say a lot of words like colour or favourite with lots of excessive us in them.... I still, however, have not gotten Let's Go To the Mall out of my head since we heard it in that diner. It's driving me crazy.
*incredible amounts of noise*
Jeff: ...Turtle? I think one of the mooses just toppled! Kick it! Quickly! Kick it!
Turtle: Wait, wha-- *slight sound of flailing panic and then the dull sound of what might be a kick* ...ow.
Jeff: ...We need a nurse!
Turtle: No, we don't. That just...it didn't even move! Did you see that? These mooses are tou-- *another sound of kicking* Ha! That one got a twitch, I think. I think...uh-oh. I think we better go back to the tent, Jeff. Like....now.
*static... click... silence*
[[ no mooses were harmed in the making of this radio. ]]
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Sokka glared at his radio. "Yes, but Turtle and Canary doesn't have snooty expensive designer clothes!!! I gots ta look GOOD!"