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fandom_radio2007-07-29 12:08 am
spacepiratevala.livejournal.com) wrote in fandom_radio2007-07-29 12:08 am
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Saturday Radio, July 28, 2007
"Good evening, Fandom! Before I get started, I'd like to give a hearty congratulations to Principal Washburn and her illegitimate offspring! Welcome to the world, small person, and be glad you've been born to a family that eschews social convention! Trust me, you'll be much happier that way."
"Oooh, hey, no classes. Or detention. Good on the one hand, and better on the other--the sneakiness lessons must be paying off, and I applaud your ability to live your lives under the radar. Very well done!"
Dorms: Clothing optional
"This morning was surprisingly busy--first, in the gym, Tori worked out on the punching bag, and then ended up auditioning for Troy. Impromptuly. It can be a word if I want it to be. Wendy the Werewolf Stalker taught me that. Outside the dorms, our ladies' man Karal watches his box o' chinchilla, moons over a letter, and disgusts his cat. Lana dropped by and told him about her cockroach issues, then tried to trade her cockroach for the chinchilla. How many pets does Karal need? I mean, really."
"Oh, I see. You were all hanging out in the fifth floor common room den of iniquity with naked Jeff and his shirtless cat. Or possibly the other way around. Either way. Jack--big surprise--is thrilled that Jeff has embraced his naked side. Or maybe Jack's naked side? I'm not quite clear on that. Anyway, assume Jack Harkness is either naked or very close to it for the rest of this part of the broadcast."
*pause*
"Oh, right. Carrying on. Katara hugged Jack hello and checked for injuries, Ronan flirts pretty hardcore with Jack, but gets told that he is like a museum piece--looking, but no touching. Which is a fallacy with your meager alarm systems, but we won't address that now."
"Katara worries about the shirtless cat's virtue and Jeff explained that nudity's a bondage--er, bonding, sorry--process. Annette is surprised to see the shirtless cat with people who aren't Chad, then wonders with Jack about the presence of Jeff's dog and question his mother's sanity. Well, isn't that friendly of them. Unfortunately for Jeff, his half nudity didn't make it easier for him to speak to Annette, although that probably wasn't helped by her asking if his mom was spying on Chad via the dog."
"Dawn was sleepy and talking to Jack--shirtless and pantsless Jack--for about five minutes before she noticed he was back. Very observant, that one. Jeff, that charmer, calls Faile a locust. She wonders, perhaps rightly, if he's a bit, shall we say, off. Jury's apparently still out on that. She declined Jack's offer to participate in shirtless day, then bonds with Katara over unexpected attendance at Fandom. Ronan tried to assure Faile that she'd adjust to Fandom quickly. Sure, that could happen. Anything's possible, from what I understand. Probable's another question."
"Jo and Jack, um...do homework over coffee. Sure. Alec joins the shirtless masses, chats with Jack in a very pro-nudity fashion, informs Hermione he's been knitting like a fiend, find out that he ranks below Aravis on Seely's nudity scale, and learns that Jeff's inspiration for nudity was a half-naked cat, so he had a very busy morning. Hermione brought her knitting to the common room, and learns about Jeff's nude union from Katara. They, again, understandably, worry about his sanity."
"Jeff? This is not insurmountable. We can work through this."
"Which does not mean I'm going to stop reporting on your actions, in case you were wondering--if nothing else, you're fascinating. Jack asks Hermione aboutthe power-mad harpy Principal Umbridge and decides to introduce her to shirtless day. Oh, Jack. Say it's not so. The syphillis must have eaten away your brain."
"A moment of silence, please."
*dead air*
"Thank you. Seely joined the ranks of the shirtless and got a thumbs up from Jeff, who promptly turned around and informed Abigail about his lack of breasts."
"Uh, Jeff? Just a hint, but I think she could probably guess that already. Although, as far as pick-up lines go, it's certainly original, so you get some points for that."
"Ronan and John Sheppard bonded over being non-newbies. Gavin flunks letter writing, Aravis searches her room for a last minute anniversary gift for Seely."
*pause*
"Aravis. You have that backwards. You get the gift, not him."
"Anyway, Seely showed up and Aravis told him she was cleaning and there was smooching. Who knew Seely was so into hygeine? Huh. And see, Aravis, if you bribe the radio squirrels--and the radio announcer--this kind of embarrassing thing doesn't happen."
"Jack returned from the common room of iniquity bearing breakfast for Cedric. Hopefully without new and exciting organisms, but the clinic probably can take care of that if he forgot to wash his hands. Haku's back in town, and got an update from Raphael--silly boys, isn't that what radio's for? Careful, or you'll make the squirrels think you don't love them, and there's nothing worse than a radio squirrel with abandonment issues. Teddy also welcomed Haku back, and told him about our new estee--anyway, our new principal. I wonder if he mentioned her loudspeaker fetish."
"In less grotesque news, Johnny Storm was--I quote--'growly'--but more concerned about Savannah when she asked. Aww. Typhoid Harkness napped until he got a phone call, and Alec was knitting up a storm until Dean dropped by to tell him about his new sister, then chatted with Johnny Blaze about his plan to do something with dildo covers that got smudged so I can't read it. Oh, if anyone's looking for a small gray cat, he's up on the roof, attacking and hissing at Teddy. You should probably also give Teddy some antiseptic ointment."
"This evening, the second floor common room had Kou watching television and Turtle asking if he would mind watching CNN. In the fifth floor common room, which was apparently disinfected since this morning, Ronan made some pasta. Isabel offered to help clean up and told Ronan about being a dog, Willow introduces both he and Isabel to Philbert the hedgehog, Chad and Ronan discuss people who are afraid of women and Japanese food. Oh, wait. Two things--missed a comma. I couldn't imagine what was so frightening about sushi and tempura."
"What? I watch the Food Network."
"Jenny complimented Ronan on the quality of the aroma of his food. AJ was also excited by the smell, and don't you people eat? Adam also showed up and offered to help with the cooking. Which seems very gracious, unless Adam can't cook, and then it's a good threat."
Town: Now with pants
"One assumes, anyway. Though Christian was late to the clinic, so maybe he forgot his and had to go back. Wilson was in this evening, and no mention of his sartorial state. Setsuna was bored over at the Devil's Nest and Ellen was on shift at Caritas, where she ended up discussing eyepatches with Barbossa. This town is so strange."
"Over at the Arms, Stanley showed up to have tea with Mary. Adam took a walk in the park, where Annette also went for a late night jog. Arashi also returned home, and was welcomed by both Deadpool and Max the fox. Welcome back!"
"Roy spent the day stuck in the trooper's station, Turtle and Canary needs employees and less emo, Dean stopped in at Groovy Tunes to tell Charlie about his little sister, Luke and Tori bowled and had arcades, the post office has been infested with singing birds, Jude was emo at Luke's Diner, but hopefully not because John Connor was there, and Al opens Book Haven after a late night yesterday."
"Not a shirtless or pantsless adult in the bunch! We are woefully unrepresented, and I feel that this situation should be remedied! Be free, recapture your youth!"
"Er, and good night!"
"Oooh, hey, no classes. Or detention. Good on the one hand, and better on the other--the sneakiness lessons must be paying off, and I applaud your ability to live your lives under the radar. Very well done!"
Dorms: Clothing optional
"This morning was surprisingly busy--first, in the gym, Tori worked out on the punching bag, and then ended up auditioning for Troy. Impromptuly. It can be a word if I want it to be. Wendy the Werewolf Stalker taught me that. Outside the dorms, our ladies' man Karal watches his box o' chinchilla, moons over a letter, and disgusts his cat. Lana dropped by and told him about her cockroach issues, then tried to trade her cockroach for the chinchilla. How many pets does Karal need? I mean, really."
"Oh, I see. You were all hanging out in the fifth floor common room den of iniquity with naked Jeff and his shirtless cat. Or possibly the other way around. Either way. Jack--big surprise--is thrilled that Jeff has embraced his naked side. Or maybe Jack's naked side? I'm not quite clear on that. Anyway, assume Jack Harkness is either naked or very close to it for the rest of this part of the broadcast."
*pause*
"Oh, right. Carrying on. Katara hugged Jack hello and checked for injuries, Ronan flirts pretty hardcore with Jack, but gets told that he is like a museum piece--looking, but no touching. Which is a fallacy with your meager alarm systems, but we won't address that now."
"Katara worries about the shirtless cat's virtue and Jeff explained that nudity's a bondage--er, bonding, sorry--process. Annette is surprised to see the shirtless cat with people who aren't Chad, then wonders with Jack about the presence of Jeff's dog and question his mother's sanity. Well, isn't that friendly of them. Unfortunately for Jeff, his half nudity didn't make it easier for him to speak to Annette, although that probably wasn't helped by her asking if his mom was spying on Chad via the dog."
"Dawn was sleepy and talking to Jack--shirtless and pantsless Jack--for about five minutes before she noticed he was back. Very observant, that one. Jeff, that charmer, calls Faile a locust. She wonders, perhaps rightly, if he's a bit, shall we say, off. Jury's apparently still out on that. She declined Jack's offer to participate in shirtless day, then bonds with Katara over unexpected attendance at Fandom. Ronan tried to assure Faile that she'd adjust to Fandom quickly. Sure, that could happen. Anything's possible, from what I understand. Probable's another question."
"Jo and Jack, um...do homework over coffee. Sure. Alec joins the shirtless masses, chats with Jack in a very pro-nudity fashion, informs Hermione he's been knitting like a fiend, find out that he ranks below Aravis on Seely's nudity scale, and learns that Jeff's inspiration for nudity was a half-naked cat, so he had a very busy morning. Hermione brought her knitting to the common room, and learns about Jeff's nude union from Katara. They, again, understandably, worry about his sanity."
"Jeff? This is not insurmountable. We can work through this."
"Which does not mean I'm going to stop reporting on your actions, in case you were wondering--if nothing else, you're fascinating. Jack asks Hermione about
"A moment of silence, please."
*dead air*
"Thank you. Seely joined the ranks of the shirtless and got a thumbs up from Jeff, who promptly turned around and informed Abigail about his lack of breasts."
"Uh, Jeff? Just a hint, but I think she could probably guess that already. Although, as far as pick-up lines go, it's certainly original, so you get some points for that."
"Ronan and John Sheppard bonded over being non-newbies. Gavin flunks letter writing, Aravis searches her room for a last minute anniversary gift for Seely."
*pause*
"Aravis. You have that backwards. You get the gift, not him."
"Anyway, Seely showed up and Aravis told him she was cleaning and there was smooching. Who knew Seely was so into hygeine? Huh. And see, Aravis, if you bribe the radio squirrels--and the radio announcer--this kind of embarrassing thing doesn't happen."
"Jack returned from the common room of iniquity bearing breakfast for Cedric. Hopefully without new and exciting organisms, but the clinic probably can take care of that if he forgot to wash his hands. Haku's back in town, and got an update from Raphael--silly boys, isn't that what radio's for? Careful, or you'll make the squirrels think you don't love them, and there's nothing worse than a radio squirrel with abandonment issues. Teddy also welcomed Haku back, and told him about our new estee--anyway, our new principal. I wonder if he mentioned her loudspeaker fetish."
"In less grotesque news, Johnny Storm was--I quote--'growly'--but more concerned about Savannah when she asked. Aww. Typhoid Harkness napped until he got a phone call, and Alec was knitting up a storm until Dean dropped by to tell him about his new sister, then chatted with Johnny Blaze about his plan to do something with dildo covers that got smudged so I can't read it. Oh, if anyone's looking for a small gray cat, he's up on the roof, attacking and hissing at Teddy. You should probably also give Teddy some antiseptic ointment."
"This evening, the second floor common room had Kou watching television and Turtle asking if he would mind watching CNN. In the fifth floor common room, which was apparently disinfected since this morning, Ronan made some pasta. Isabel offered to help clean up and told Ronan about being a dog, Willow introduces both he and Isabel to Philbert the hedgehog, Chad and Ronan discuss people who are afraid of women and Japanese food. Oh, wait. Two things--missed a comma. I couldn't imagine what was so frightening about sushi and tempura."
"What? I watch the Food Network."
"Jenny complimented Ronan on the quality of the aroma of his food. AJ was also excited by the smell, and don't you people eat? Adam also showed up and offered to help with the cooking. Which seems very gracious, unless Adam can't cook, and then it's a good threat."
Town: Now with pants
"One assumes, anyway. Though Christian was late to the clinic, so maybe he forgot his and had to go back. Wilson was in this evening, and no mention of his sartorial state. Setsuna was bored over at the Devil's Nest and Ellen was on shift at Caritas, where she ended up discussing eyepatches with Barbossa. This town is so strange."
"Over at the Arms, Stanley showed up to have tea with Mary. Adam took a walk in the park, where Annette also went for a late night jog. Arashi also returned home, and was welcomed by both Deadpool and Max the fox. Welcome back!"
"Roy spent the day stuck in the trooper's station, Turtle and Canary needs employees and less emo, Dean stopped in at Groovy Tunes to tell Charlie about his little sister, Luke and Tori bowled and had arcades, the post office has been infested with singing birds, Jude was emo at Luke's Diner, but hopefully not because John Connor was there, and Al opens Book Haven after a late night yesterday."
"Not a shirtless or pantsless adult in the bunch! We are woefully unrepresented, and I feel that this situation should be remedied! Be free, recapture your youth!"
"Er, and good night!"