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fandom_radio2011-08-04 09:33 am
capt-maxfactor.livejournal.com) wrote in fandom_radio2011-08-04 09:33 am
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Pirate Radio [Thursday, August 3, 2011]
Good morning, me hearties and whatever those creepy things are lurking out by the pond! It is I, Captain Jack Sparrow, coming to you live through your radio and across the school intercom because I'm sneaky that way!
We have lots o' news from yesterday today, so settle in and hope this doesn't take until tomorrow.
*silence*
What? I thought it was very clever.
First off, yesterday th' infection o' the campground has extended t' cabins, which are now gray and brittle. So no sneaking back there t' have sex, all right? Oops, too late. Tony and Topher already went.
And now to classes! In times o' crisis, it's important t' cling t' traditions, savvy? In The Magic of a Good Time, students got to pick out their favorite songs after witnessing their teacher having some manner of spaz attack at the front of the classroom. There's a lot o' illness in these notes, so I thought it might be relevent. Kenzi checked in on Pinkie Pie and found out that this sort o' thing happened t' her when something bad was happenin' outside. So she's right on schedule? Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse wrote essays on what they would do in life or death situations--personally, I like running if I can't possibly talk me way out o' it--and Everything's a Weapon mostly took their weapons--real weapons, not bowling pins-- and went outside t' beat on creepy animals. Raise yer hand if yer surprised.
Please tell me no one's hand is up.
Gabrielle was in the library, joined today by Bo and Belle because books, in a pinch, can be thrown as ye run.
*chittering*
That's not what they were there for?
Stark was in his office listening to the radio--in that case, hello Stark! and fretting about the news. It hasn't been the greatest week, it's true. Zoe was scratching her arms in her office--that can't be good--until Cable came in t' say he was clearing off of the island and taking Jan with him and would Zoe like for Grace t' go too? Aww, that's sweet and depressing at th' same time. Then Faramir came into the office wit' a freshly killed...whatever it is that's running loose out there. In terms o' impressing beautiful, powerful women, I would have gone with just about anything else, frankly.
In the dorms, we have a whole lot o' sick people who refuse t' go to the clinic. I'm fairly sure that they don't use leeches t' heal you any more, but don't quote me on that. Caroline woke Jacob, who admitted t' not feeling well and was cold for once, and Claudia called home to complain about feeling bad before getting another phone call, and then an equally ill Scully stopping by wit' aspirin. Ramona 'n her giant hammer were chain smoking in her room--well she was, not the hammer--and Simon came in after being attacked by a deer--those are DEER?!--and they discussed the situation.
Which is bad, for those of you just waking up. VERY BAD.
Tony was curled up with his laptop and exchanged sick whines of whiny sickness with Topher as they argued about who should go to the clinic first. Warren was molting in his room--that also can't be good--and had a panic attack about it when Karla stopped by. See? I told ye it wasn't good. I'm brilliant! Toby was also feeling ill and ignoring Stan's advice to go to the clinic.
Hold on while I do a bit o' math, all right? That's at least eight o' ye that are ill and I haven't gotten t' town yet. GET TO THE CLINIC. THE NURSES ARE QUITE ATTRACTIVE. There. Public service announcement over.
And in town, Deadpool has decided he's contracted space herpes from the rock he touched, which is why Cable and Jan left town. And now Zoe's office makes more sense! You're all welcome.
And now here's the rundown o' crazy people who went out t' kill things today: Alistair and Morrigan, who managed to kill things and bicker--I know people like that! They got married, poor souls--Guy, who flung things around with his ring before going off to scout for more monsters, Ronan, who decided that killing things was a perfect segue to introduce himself t' Morrigan, Alistair, and Cindy, and then talking t' Reno about what brought them back t' Fandom. Apparently, the opportunity t' kill creepy deer was just irresistible. Reno 'n Alistair found the time to compliment each other's hair and armor while killing things, Cindy 'n Reno compared these monsters to ones at home, and Alistair and Cindy talked about swooning 'n how dirty his armor was getting. I'm pretty sure that's not a euphemism. And finally at the end of the day, the score was Alice 1, deer 0.
Quinn felt horrible at the hotel--that's ten of you now--GO TO THE CLINIC I DON'T WANT YER COOTIES--William was doing research at Fixer-Uppers, Lion-o and Rude were ready t' defend their places of work--
*chittering*
I've been told the squirrels would leave me to my gruesome fate. Angry birds were attacking Turtle & Canary, and Lindsay had the music cranked at Groovy Tunes, possibly to stop having t' listen to attacking birds from Turtle & Canary. Bo was heavily armed--I'll give ye a moment to imagine that--and visited Mitchell for the evening, and Captain Hook broke his mirror. Possibly because Bo didn't visit him.
Jessica was covered in blood at the Devil's Nest--not good--Tino was guarding the door at Caritas until Ramona showed up to escort Nathan's butt--and the rest of him--back to the dorms--and Chloe was ALL BY HERSELF AT THE CLINIC WHILE YE RUN AROUND WIT' GRAY PATCHES ON YER ARMS. WHAT'S WRONG WIT' YE?
*frantic chittering*
Ooh, late breaking news! There's a town hall meeting in the auditorium this afternoon where those of us who aren't turning gray will hopefully learn how t' avoid such a dire fate.
*more frantic chittering*
What do you mean, attacking squirrels?
*crashing, banging, radio silence*
We have lots o' news from yesterday today, so settle in and hope this doesn't take until tomorrow.
*silence*
What? I thought it was very clever.
First off, yesterday th' infection o' the campground has extended t' cabins, which are now gray and brittle. So no sneaking back there t' have sex, all right? Oops, too late. Tony and Topher already went.
And now to classes! In times o' crisis, it's important t' cling t' traditions, savvy? In The Magic of a Good Time, students got to pick out their favorite songs after witnessing their teacher having some manner of spaz attack at the front of the classroom. There's a lot o' illness in these notes, so I thought it might be relevent. Kenzi checked in on Pinkie Pie and found out that this sort o' thing happened t' her when something bad was happenin' outside. So she's right on schedule? Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse wrote essays on what they would do in life or death situations--personally, I like running if I can't possibly talk me way out o' it--and Everything's a Weapon mostly took their weapons--real weapons, not bowling pins-- and went outside t' beat on creepy animals. Raise yer hand if yer surprised.
Please tell me no one's hand is up.
Gabrielle was in the library, joined today by Bo and Belle because books, in a pinch, can be thrown as ye run.
*chittering*
That's not what they were there for?
Stark was in his office listening to the radio--in that case, hello Stark! and fretting about the news. It hasn't been the greatest week, it's true. Zoe was scratching her arms in her office--that can't be good--until Cable came in t' say he was clearing off of the island and taking Jan with him and would Zoe like for Grace t' go too? Aww, that's sweet and depressing at th' same time. Then Faramir came into the office wit' a freshly killed...whatever it is that's running loose out there. In terms o' impressing beautiful, powerful women, I would have gone with just about anything else, frankly.
In the dorms, we have a whole lot o' sick people who refuse t' go to the clinic. I'm fairly sure that they don't use leeches t' heal you any more, but don't quote me on that. Caroline woke Jacob, who admitted t' not feeling well and was cold for once, and Claudia called home to complain about feeling bad before getting another phone call, and then an equally ill Scully stopping by wit' aspirin. Ramona 'n her giant hammer were chain smoking in her room--well she was, not the hammer--and Simon came in after being attacked by a deer--those are DEER?!--and they discussed the situation.
Which is bad, for those of you just waking up. VERY BAD.
Tony was curled up with his laptop and exchanged sick whines of whiny sickness with Topher as they argued about who should go to the clinic first. Warren was molting in his room--that also can't be good--and had a panic attack about it when Karla stopped by. See? I told ye it wasn't good. I'm brilliant! Toby was also feeling ill and ignoring Stan's advice to go to the clinic.
Hold on while I do a bit o' math, all right? That's at least eight o' ye that are ill and I haven't gotten t' town yet. GET TO THE CLINIC. THE NURSES ARE QUITE ATTRACTIVE. There. Public service announcement over.
And in town, Deadpool has decided he's contracted space herpes from the rock he touched, which is why Cable and Jan left town. And now Zoe's office makes more sense! You're all welcome.
And now here's the rundown o' crazy people who went out t' kill things today: Alistair and Morrigan, who managed to kill things and bicker--I know people like that! They got married, poor souls--Guy, who flung things around with his ring before going off to scout for more monsters, Ronan, who decided that killing things was a perfect segue to introduce himself t' Morrigan, Alistair, and Cindy, and then talking t' Reno about what brought them back t' Fandom. Apparently, the opportunity t' kill creepy deer was just irresistible. Reno 'n Alistair found the time to compliment each other's hair and armor while killing things, Cindy 'n Reno compared these monsters to ones at home, and Alistair and Cindy talked about swooning 'n how dirty his armor was getting. I'm pretty sure that's not a euphemism. And finally at the end of the day, the score was Alice 1, deer 0.
Quinn felt horrible at the hotel--that's ten of you now--GO TO THE CLINIC I DON'T WANT YER COOTIES--William was doing research at Fixer-Uppers, Lion-o and Rude were ready t' defend their places of work--
*chittering*
I've been told the squirrels would leave me to my gruesome fate. Angry birds were attacking Turtle & Canary, and Lindsay had the music cranked at Groovy Tunes, possibly to stop having t' listen to attacking birds from Turtle & Canary. Bo was heavily armed--I'll give ye a moment to imagine that--and visited Mitchell for the evening, and Captain Hook broke his mirror. Possibly because Bo didn't visit him.
Jessica was covered in blood at the Devil's Nest--not good--Tino was guarding the door at Caritas until Ramona showed up to escort Nathan's butt--and the rest of him--back to the dorms--and Chloe was ALL BY HERSELF AT THE CLINIC WHILE YE RUN AROUND WIT' GRAY PATCHES ON YER ARMS. WHAT'S WRONG WIT' YE?
*frantic chittering*
Ooh, late breaking news! There's a town hall meeting in the auditorium this afternoon where those of us who aren't turning gray will hopefully learn how t' avoid such a dire fate.
*more frantic chittering*
What do you mean, attacking squirrels?
*crashing, banging, radio silence*