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fandom_radio2011-05-27 12:25 am
exactlyaverage.livejournal.com) wrote in fandom_radio2011-05-27 12:25 am
Entry tags:
Radio: May 5/27
Jack: Morning kids! It's me. Jack Carter.
Columbus: And I'm Columbus Ohio.
Jack: That never stops sounding weird.
Columbus: And we're back once again to read you the news. Collected and written by squirrels.
Jack: Annnnnd there it is. The even weirder.
Columbus: Shall we?
Jack: We shall. First up?
SCHOOL
Jack: So in Childcare for Idiots the guy in pajamas changed the diaper of the kid of the guy who teaches us not to die. Then the pajama man-
Columbus: You know those two guys have names.
Jack: Yeah, but I don't think they're real.
Columbus: Like my name?
Jack: I don't think your name is real either. Anyway, Pajama-man made us change the diapers on dolls who can poop. Which is slightly more creepy than Pajama-man. Karla then tried to change a doll and got help from some other guy whose name is probably fake as well.
Columbus: Then over in Care for Hirelings Captain Hook-
Jack: Fake name.
Columbus: -discussed how to punish minons and had the Class propose their own punishments for their own future hirelings.
Jack: Ah. It's like the circle of life. But with punishment.
Columbus: Um. Sure. Okay. Today in Creative Writing Shunsui forced everyone to watch a music video starring Meatloaf.
Jack: Meatloaf? I love Meatloaf!
Columbus: The musician or the food?
Jack: Well, I don't think a teacher would lecture about ground beef.
Columbus: Good point. Then the class was forced to brainstorm ideas about the one thing Meatloaf won't do for love-
JacK: That's easy. Diet.
Columbus: - And then handed in their assignment while Shunshui might have earwormed himself.
Jack: Is it me or does that sound vaguely disgusting?
Columbus: Vaguely disgusting. What doesn't sound disgusting is that Anakin-
Jack: Fake name.
Columbus: got a phone call while Alexander opened the library and settled down for a long day of reading.
Jack: You're right. Not disgusting at all. Boring... but definitely not disgusting.
DORMS
Jack: Let's see. In the afternoon, Sam LaCroix was talking to thin air and then got a visit from Stan which led to talk about a guy named Cartman, butter and going adventuring in Tokyo.
Columbus: They talked about butter?
Jack: Well it sounds a lot better than Stan's conversation with Jocelyn about drowned rats. Toby then stopped by to tell sam that he could read thoughts and knew that Sam's a necro...mancer. Really?
Columbus: Yeah, that can't be good.
Jack: HEY!
Columbus: What?
Jack: Never mind. Over in Jake's room, Jake was reading car magazines and got mocked for it by Caroline. Mercy then found Jake and told him he smelled like mint. Which apparently freaked out Jake.
Columbus: Why would that freak out anyone?
Jack: Well it says here that Jake thought he had a more jasmine like aroma.
Columbus: Really?
Jack: No. I made it up. Why the hell should I care if he freaks out because of mint? Maybe he had a bad experience with the doublemint twins.
Columbus: Who?
Jack: Nevermind. Last night Nathan was watching Tv and eating pizza in the common room when he was tackled by Ariel who was so happy to see he came back from the dead. OH COME ON! Really?
Columbus: Oh, yeah. He was dead.
Jack: Really?
Columbus: Really.
Jack: And he's alive now.
Columbus: Yes. Definitely alive.
Jack: ... His last name isn't Stark, is it?
Columbus: Um. No?
Jack: Good. Then I don't care. Moving on!
TOWN
Columbus: Let's see. Yesterday Fraser was at MHA hoping the rain will stop while Millie used magic to make the Book Haven be bright and sunny.
Jack: Okay. People? Hold it right there. Let's not screw around with the weather, okay? The last thing I want to do is cause another explosion to shock the Earth back from another ice age.
Columbus: Wait. What?
Jack: Long story. Moving on! Helen spent the day with some horses at The Gig while Jack Priest studied some cases over at Cabot & Associates before heading over to explore New Tokyo.
Columbus: Then over at Strokes of Genius Cally did a display with umbrellas while Sov cleaned up over at Fixer-Uppers.
Jack: In the evening, Jack Sparrow discussed Long Term Finance and the benefits fo carrying gems while Eric talked to Kate about Fairies. ... Because that's exactly what this island needs. Little fairies making my life miserable. Meanwhile over in the clinic, Dana was screwing around and surfing the internet
Columbus: And finally over at Caritas, the zombies were driving Chuck to drink by playing Broadway show tunes. Wait. Zombies?
Jack: Playing showtunes?
...
Columbus & JacK: That can't be good.
Columbus: I think I'm going to need to check this place out.
Jack: I think I'm going to stay in my room and let you check that place out.
Columbus: What? Are you afraid of Zombies?
Jack: Nope. Just show tunes.
Columbus: Really?
Jack: NO! That's it from us folks! Have a good morning and STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM ZOMBIES!
Columbus: And I'm Columbus Ohio.
Jack: That never stops sounding weird.
Columbus: And we're back once again to read you the news. Collected and written by squirrels.
Jack: Annnnnd there it is. The even weirder.
Columbus: Shall we?
Jack: We shall. First up?
SCHOOL
Jack: So in Childcare for Idiots the guy in pajamas changed the diaper of the kid of the guy who teaches us not to die. Then the pajama man-
Columbus: You know those two guys have names.
Jack: Yeah, but I don't think they're real.
Columbus: Like my name?
Jack: I don't think your name is real either. Anyway, Pajama-man made us change the diapers on dolls who can poop. Which is slightly more creepy than Pajama-man. Karla then tried to change a doll and got help from some other guy whose name is probably fake as well.
Columbus: Then over in Care for Hirelings Captain Hook-
Jack: Fake name.
Columbus: -discussed how to punish minons and had the Class propose their own punishments for their own future hirelings.
Jack: Ah. It's like the circle of life. But with punishment.
Columbus: Um. Sure. Okay. Today in Creative Writing Shunsui forced everyone to watch a music video starring Meatloaf.
Jack: Meatloaf? I love Meatloaf!
Columbus: The musician or the food?
Jack: Well, I don't think a teacher would lecture about ground beef.
Columbus: Good point. Then the class was forced to brainstorm ideas about the one thing Meatloaf won't do for love-
JacK: That's easy. Diet.
Columbus: - And then handed in their assignment while Shunshui might have earwormed himself.
Jack: Is it me or does that sound vaguely disgusting?
Columbus: Vaguely disgusting. What doesn't sound disgusting is that Anakin-
Jack: Fake name.
Columbus: got a phone call while Alexander opened the library and settled down for a long day of reading.
Jack: You're right. Not disgusting at all. Boring... but definitely not disgusting.
DORMS
Jack: Let's see. In the afternoon, Sam LaCroix was talking to thin air and then got a visit from Stan which led to talk about a guy named Cartman, butter and going adventuring in Tokyo.
Columbus: They talked about butter?
Jack: Well it sounds a lot better than Stan's conversation with Jocelyn about drowned rats. Toby then stopped by to tell sam that he could read thoughts and knew that Sam's a necro...mancer. Really?
Columbus: Yeah, that can't be good.
Jack: HEY!
Columbus: What?
Jack: Never mind. Over in Jake's room, Jake was reading car magazines and got mocked for it by Caroline. Mercy then found Jake and told him he smelled like mint. Which apparently freaked out Jake.
Columbus: Why would that freak out anyone?
Jack: Well it says here that Jake thought he had a more jasmine like aroma.
Columbus: Really?
Jack: No. I made it up. Why the hell should I care if he freaks out because of mint? Maybe he had a bad experience with the doublemint twins.
Columbus: Who?
Jack: Nevermind. Last night Nathan was watching Tv and eating pizza in the common room when he was tackled by Ariel who was so happy to see he came back from the dead. OH COME ON! Really?
Columbus: Oh, yeah. He was dead.
Jack: Really?
Columbus: Really.
Jack: And he's alive now.
Columbus: Yes. Definitely alive.
Jack: ... His last name isn't Stark, is it?
Columbus: Um. No?
Jack: Good. Then I don't care. Moving on!
TOWN
Columbus: Let's see. Yesterday Fraser was at MHA hoping the rain will stop while Millie used magic to make the Book Haven be bright and sunny.
Jack: Okay. People? Hold it right there. Let's not screw around with the weather, okay? The last thing I want to do is cause another explosion to shock the Earth back from another ice age.
Columbus: Wait. What?
Jack: Long story. Moving on! Helen spent the day with some horses at The Gig while Jack Priest studied some cases over at Cabot & Associates before heading over to explore New Tokyo.
Columbus: Then over at Strokes of Genius Cally did a display with umbrellas while Sov cleaned up over at Fixer-Uppers.
Jack: In the evening, Jack Sparrow discussed Long Term Finance and the benefits fo carrying gems while Eric talked to Kate about Fairies. ... Because that's exactly what this island needs. Little fairies making my life miserable. Meanwhile over in the clinic, Dana was screwing around and surfing the internet
Columbus: And finally over at Caritas, the zombies were driving Chuck to drink by playing Broadway show tunes. Wait. Zombies?
Jack: Playing showtunes?
...
Columbus & JacK: That can't be good.
Columbus: I think I'm going to need to check this place out.
Jack: I think I'm going to stay in my room and let you check that place out.
Columbus: What? Are you afraid of Zombies?
Jack: Nope. Just show tunes.
Columbus: Really?
Jack: NO! That's it from us folks! Have a good morning and STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM ZOMBIES!