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fandom_radio2011-02-22 09:36 am
capt-maxfactor.livejournal.com) wrote in fandom_radio2011-02-22 09:36 am
Entry tags:
Pirate Radio, Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Good morning, Fandom! All...three of you, or something. And for all you scurvy skalliwags who've gone off to Hawaii without even taking a proper ship, well. There are words for you and I shall use them right now!
*forty five seconds of radio feedback*
There. I trust you are now feeling quite remorseful and as such will be bringing me back gifts to earn my favor and make sure I don't slander you, your relationships and your secret liaisons with livestock--you know who you are--for all of your friends to hear. I prefer my bribes in genuine gold, jewels and other easily portable items. Rum will suffice as well.
Let's start with this island where we are certainly not slogging through sleet and snow and colds and I hate you all and--
*thirty more seconds of radio feedback*
Rosalind was in her room working, which is no way to spend a vacation, until she was interrupted by texts. Is text not used in working these days? It's probably better that way; most of the people I knew either used calligraphy, which took forever, or signed their name with an X, which is dreadfully uncreative. Speaking of uncreative, the rodents left here apparently took to drinking while on the job, so we know naught of what passed between Nico and Luke other than they spoke in their room. There were probably no animals involved because they didn't go to Hawaii and thus don't need to bribe me. Though a little bribery never hurt anything. That's the city motto of Port Royal, you know.
Lacey was having a--oh, it's too early for puns about soup, squirrels--at the diner and Jake was doing more text things at Caritas. And...that's all for this island. Let's call someone and find out what happened in Hawaii, where it is very, very, very early.
*sound of phone ringing*
Anakin: If Juliet leaped off of the sofa again, I'm sorry---
Jack: Ahoy, me heartie, you're on live with Captain Jack Sparrow! There will be a squirrel breaking into your room momentarily with--
Anakin: I can kill you with my brain from here, pirate.
*sound of dead air*
It seems we've lost contact with the very ornery and humorless Master Skywalker, listeners! Let's try another room, shall we?
*sound of phone ringing. And ringing. And ringing*
Rilla: Hello?
Jack: Ahoy, wench, you're on live with Captain Jack Sparrow! There will be a--
Rilla: WHY IS THERE A NOTE-WIELDING RODENT IN MY BED WITH ME?!!
Jack: Yes, about that. Welcome to the radio, love. Now read.
Rilla: This seems horribly improper. Very well. Yesterday here in Hawaii, we were all having a simply lovely time. Mr. Wiggin was in his room with his computer, which is fun for some people, I suppose, but most of us found more social ways to spend our time. Mr. Owen, for instance, found a whirlpool--a safe one, I pray--and Miss Darling went shopping. Oooh, were there sales? I need a new hat! Miss [Last Name for Kennedy That Everyone Knows] was playing sand volleyball--
*chittering*
There's no need to add "poorly," thank you, Mr. Jackson moved from the beach into the pool and might be in danger of becoming half-fish this week, and Mr. Skywalker was greeted by Mr. Leonhart as they both performed...floating yoga. That sounds odd. They should go to the spa instead, like Mr. Kyōraku, Mrs. Skywalker, and I did! My toes are a lovely shade of coral now.
*chittering*
You woke me up at dawn. I shall decide what is newsworthy.
Most of you braved the sun and getting pink and blotchy in order to spend time on the beach yesterday, and it really was a very lovely day out, but I am not showing anyone that much skin. It's improper. Mr. Young told Miss Di Glacia that he was not permanently injured when she hit him in the eye, which is unladylike but not entirely out of character for her, and the very wise Miss Stackhouse noted to the slightly less wise Miss Di Glacia that the school must have scheduled this holiday knowing that those of you who had children show up last weekend would be in need of a break. Then they discussed Miss Di Glacia's relationship with Mr. Worthington. Mr. Jackson was surprised to discover that Mr. Valdez likes the water, despite finding him on the beach. I would guess that people who don't enjoy the water aren't near it? They probably spend their holidays on the prairie, staring at grass. Then there was talk about fixing up suits of armor, much like the Knights of Camelot wore, I imagine. *sigh* I'm sure it was all very dashing and chivalrous back then. Princess Ariel found the sight of Mr...the Frog--I do hope I have that title correct! and his surf board to be quite adorable, and Mr. Puckerman was exercising his arms, much to the admiration of Miss Gregson, who was quick to assure him that her interest was entirely academic, as she is seeing a boy from back home. If he has nicer arms than Mr. Puckerman, she is lucky indeed! And Mr. Puckerman and Miss Fabray have decided to go on another outing together and that's so wonderful, Quinn! I am quite ecstatic for you! And Miss Amaquelin had Mr. Boltagon rub lotion on her skin, which might be scandalous but is also sound science for saving her lovely complexion.
And a number of people decided that hiking a mountain would be a wonderful vacation pasttime. I don't mind a ramble through the woods, but walks that require special shoes are quite beyond me. Mr. Wega and Miss Cally of Auron admitted to each other--and now to all of us--that they didn't know where Hawaii was until now, and then Mr. Wega chatted with Mr. Wyndam-Pryce about the strange children that were everywhere last week. Mr. Wyndam-Pryce admitted to Miss Fabray that he was climbing a mountain to avoid surfing with Miss [Last Name for Kennedy That Everyone Knows] and oh, I do hope that wasn't supposed to be in confidence, and Miss Everdeen--after noting that--oh, happy belated birthday, Wesley!--he is quite mature and 18 now...got him to climb a tree. That doesn't seem all that mature. Mr. Stark believes Miss Brown to be mad which is not a polite thing to say aloud. I think half of you are completely insane, but you don't hear me saying it to your faces--
*squirrelly laughter*
Oh dear. Miss Scully got photographs of Miss Brown posing--hopefully sanely--and Mr. Todd asked if she was was enjoying herself.
In the evening, Miss Stackhouse told Mr. Drake that he would not be sleeping in her room, as is only proper, mysterious strangers broke into Mr. Starsmore and Miss Roth's room and replaced all of their clothing--how terrible!--Miss Everdeen sang Happy Birthday to Mr. Wyndam-Pryce, and Miss Forbes ordered dinner to arrive in her room. How decadent!
In other food-related activities, Mr. Drake and Miss Stackhouse wondered on the wisdom of eating dessert first at Hale Kai, and Mr. and Mrs. Skywalker were excited not to have to cut up food for other people...that seems quite odd to me. At the Kahakai Bar--you were at a bar?!--Miss Fabray told Miss Gregson that she would be attending early morning yoga today. Since I'm up anyway I might join you. What's yoga? Miss Stackhouse learned about Miss Heartilly's rather trying trip home, and then Miss Heartiilly and Mr. Leonhart wondered if you can be angry at someone for something that isn't their fault. Trust me, at home, the Elliotts have elevated that to an art form. Mr. Wayne was impressed that Miss Flowers hair was hair coloured and not very strange and told her that she has influence over Mr. Stark because she is a pretty girl and Mr. Stark is socially awkward. Again, I do hope I'm not speaking out of turn.
And finally, a group of us went stargazing last night and it was lovely and warm and I highly recommend it. Mr...the Frog expressed his pleasure with the climate to Miss Akatsutsumi while we were there. And I'm out of notes, Mr. Pirate, so I am returning to sleep or to find a good cup of tea. Good day.
*click*
Jack: And that's all from Fandom too, me hearties. To those of you in Hawaii, I hope ye all get sunburned and suffer from vile hangover headaches. Until next week!
*forty five seconds of radio feedback*
There. I trust you are now feeling quite remorseful and as such will be bringing me back gifts to earn my favor and make sure I don't slander you, your relationships and your secret liaisons with livestock--you know who you are--for all of your friends to hear. I prefer my bribes in genuine gold, jewels and other easily portable items. Rum will suffice as well.
Let's start with this island where we are certainly not slogging through sleet and snow and colds and I hate you all and--
*thirty more seconds of radio feedback*
Rosalind was in her room working, which is no way to spend a vacation, until she was interrupted by texts. Is text not used in working these days? It's probably better that way; most of the people I knew either used calligraphy, which took forever, or signed their name with an X, which is dreadfully uncreative. Speaking of uncreative, the rodents left here apparently took to drinking while on the job, so we know naught of what passed between Nico and Luke other than they spoke in their room. There were probably no animals involved because they didn't go to Hawaii and thus don't need to bribe me. Though a little bribery never hurt anything. That's the city motto of Port Royal, you know.
Lacey was having a--oh, it's too early for puns about soup, squirrels--at the diner and Jake was doing more text things at Caritas. And...that's all for this island. Let's call someone and find out what happened in Hawaii, where it is very, very, very early.
*sound of phone ringing*
Anakin: If Juliet leaped off of the sofa again, I'm sorry---
Jack: Ahoy, me heartie, you're on live with Captain Jack Sparrow! There will be a squirrel breaking into your room momentarily with--
Anakin: I can kill you with my brain from here, pirate.
*sound of dead air*
It seems we've lost contact with the very ornery and humorless Master Skywalker, listeners! Let's try another room, shall we?
*sound of phone ringing. And ringing. And ringing*
Rilla: Hello?
Jack: Ahoy, wench, you're on live with Captain Jack Sparrow! There will be a--
Rilla: WHY IS THERE A NOTE-WIELDING RODENT IN MY BED WITH ME?!!
Jack: Yes, about that. Welcome to the radio, love. Now read.
Rilla: This seems horribly improper. Very well. Yesterday here in Hawaii, we were all having a simply lovely time. Mr. Wiggin was in his room with his computer, which is fun for some people, I suppose, but most of us found more social ways to spend our time. Mr. Owen, for instance, found a whirlpool--a safe one, I pray--and Miss Darling went shopping. Oooh, were there sales? I need a new hat! Miss [Last Name for Kennedy That Everyone Knows] was playing sand volleyball--
*chittering*
There's no need to add "poorly," thank you, Mr. Jackson moved from the beach into the pool and might be in danger of becoming half-fish this week, and Mr. Skywalker was greeted by Mr. Leonhart as they both performed...floating yoga. That sounds odd. They should go to the spa instead, like Mr. Kyōraku, Mrs. Skywalker, and I did! My toes are a lovely shade of coral now.
*chittering*
You woke me up at dawn. I shall decide what is newsworthy.
Most of you braved the sun and getting pink and blotchy in order to spend time on the beach yesterday, and it really was a very lovely day out, but I am not showing anyone that much skin. It's improper. Mr. Young told Miss Di Glacia that he was not permanently injured when she hit him in the eye, which is unladylike but not entirely out of character for her, and the very wise Miss Stackhouse noted to the slightly less wise Miss Di Glacia that the school must have scheduled this holiday knowing that those of you who had children show up last weekend would be in need of a break. Then they discussed Miss Di Glacia's relationship with Mr. Worthington. Mr. Jackson was surprised to discover that Mr. Valdez likes the water, despite finding him on the beach. I would guess that people who don't enjoy the water aren't near it? They probably spend their holidays on the prairie, staring at grass. Then there was talk about fixing up suits of armor, much like the Knights of Camelot wore, I imagine. *sigh* I'm sure it was all very dashing and chivalrous back then. Princess Ariel found the sight of Mr...the Frog--I do hope I have that title correct! and his surf board to be quite adorable, and Mr. Puckerman was exercising his arms, much to the admiration of Miss Gregson, who was quick to assure him that her interest was entirely academic, as she is seeing a boy from back home. If he has nicer arms than Mr. Puckerman, she is lucky indeed! And Mr. Puckerman and Miss Fabray have decided to go on another outing together and that's so wonderful, Quinn! I am quite ecstatic for you! And Miss Amaquelin had Mr. Boltagon rub lotion on her skin, which might be scandalous but is also sound science for saving her lovely complexion.
And a number of people decided that hiking a mountain would be a wonderful vacation pasttime. I don't mind a ramble through the woods, but walks that require special shoes are quite beyond me. Mr. Wega and Miss Cally of Auron admitted to each other--and now to all of us--that they didn't know where Hawaii was until now, and then Mr. Wega chatted with Mr. Wyndam-Pryce about the strange children that were everywhere last week. Mr. Wyndam-Pryce admitted to Miss Fabray that he was climbing a mountain to avoid surfing with Miss [Last Name for Kennedy That Everyone Knows] and oh, I do hope that wasn't supposed to be in confidence, and Miss Everdeen--after noting that--oh, happy belated birthday, Wesley!--he is quite mature and 18 now...got him to climb a tree. That doesn't seem all that mature. Mr. Stark believes Miss Brown to be mad which is not a polite thing to say aloud. I think half of you are completely insane, but you don't hear me saying it to your faces--
*squirrelly laughter*
Oh dear. Miss Scully got photographs of Miss Brown posing--hopefully sanely--and Mr. Todd asked if she was was enjoying herself.
In the evening, Miss Stackhouse told Mr. Drake that he would not be sleeping in her room, as is only proper, mysterious strangers broke into Mr. Starsmore and Miss Roth's room and replaced all of their clothing--how terrible!--Miss Everdeen sang Happy Birthday to Mr. Wyndam-Pryce, and Miss Forbes ordered dinner to arrive in her room. How decadent!
In other food-related activities, Mr. Drake and Miss Stackhouse wondered on the wisdom of eating dessert first at Hale Kai, and Mr. and Mrs. Skywalker were excited not to have to cut up food for other people...that seems quite odd to me. At the Kahakai Bar--you were at a bar?!--Miss Fabray told Miss Gregson that she would be attending early morning yoga today. Since I'm up anyway I might join you. What's yoga? Miss Stackhouse learned about Miss Heartilly's rather trying trip home, and then Miss Heartiilly and Mr. Leonhart wondered if you can be angry at someone for something that isn't their fault. Trust me, at home, the Elliotts have elevated that to an art form. Mr. Wayne was impressed that Miss Flowers hair was hair coloured and not very strange and told her that she has influence over Mr. Stark because she is a pretty girl and Mr. Stark is socially awkward. Again, I do hope I'm not speaking out of turn.
And finally, a group of us went stargazing last night and it was lovely and warm and I highly recommend it. Mr...the Frog expressed his pleasure with the climate to Miss Akatsutsumi while we were there. And I'm out of notes, Mr. Pirate, so I am returning to sleep or to find a good cup of tea. Good day.
*click*
Jack: And that's all from Fandom too, me hearties. To those of you in Hawaii, I hope ye all get sunburned and suffer from vile hangover headaches. Until next week!