Fandom Radio, Wednesday 2/24/10

[not-ironmaiden.livejournal.com]

Tony: Why didn't we go to the Bahamas?

Tyler: I didn't feel like going on vacation with the same people I see every day. You could call your plane if you really want to go somewhere.

Tony: ...true. Maybe tomorrow.

Tyler: Tony Stark, ladies and gentleman.

In news from places we aren't, people had all kinds of adventures in the Bahamas. Apparently they're all swimming with sea lions in Dolphin Cove. Tara and Kennedy are all nauseatingly cute and try to get the sea lion to pose. Then Aravis and Kennedy want to get a sea lion home.

Tony, can we have a pet sea lion?

Tony: Do you promise to take it for walks every day?

Tyler: ... let's not. Anyhow, Harper and Alex-the-girl astutely figure out that the dolphins are sea lions, and a sea lion is bouncing froggy Robin around. Awesome hobby, sea lion. And then there's a water park where Alex-the-boy goes down a lazy river, Scherbatsky rock climbs, Ben tries to get killed on a water slide, and Karla and George get their flirt on in inner tubes. How wholesome.

Tony: You would think so.

Tyler: It's making me gag. There are also water adventures . Loki wears some dumbass helmet to walk with sharks. I'd pay for a photo of that. Puck and Elena are all kissy and date-y and stuff with the sharks. Ben and Ender snorkel, Karla plays with the sharks, and this place has a marine habitat too. Where Priestly, Summer and Karla all watch fish.

Tony: When they weren't busy being tourists, there was also a hotel to stay in. Jaime was busy trying to be subtle and get Tony to spill something about Dinah, but obviously he failed if the booze soaked squirrels picked up on it. Jack Burton was in his room, drinking coffee. Thrilling. Hurley picked up Hoshi for a picnic and they discussed Russian folktales.

In the Bahamas.

Uh-huh.

Tyler: Maybe there's nothing else in their lives. Maybe it was folktales or the weather.

Tony: I'd pick the weather. There was also, surprise surprise, a beach for people to relax on. Leda apparently helped Bod put on sunscreen while Hannibal was busy being declared a kicker of sand by Kate for saying sex helps you sleep better.

...Well, if you have enough of it in one night.

Jack Priest stopped by to check up on her with a drink that's probably more likely found on Girls Gone Wild. Let's see... Angela Martin got a sunburn--thrilling--Jonas and Beka got into a water fight while discussing what they've done on vacation. Oh god, they're one of those couples.

Speaking of those couples, Max and Dite flirted before going sailing. I'm selling my yacht, you know. There will be no romantic sailing trips.

Tyler: You break my heart, Tony.

Tony: I know you had your heart set on caviar and champagne this weekend. Effy attempted to make Griff drink his vacation away to no avail. Uh huh. Karla told Dinah all about the thrill of curling, Layla had a book and sunscreen and probably one of those hates older women seem to love, and Jack and Alex tease each other about dating and abstinence. I think I broke out in hives just reading that.

Sookie explained why she had an egg timer at the beach. It doesn't make it any less tacky. Dru took a walk on the beach while someone named Jacob was lazy on it as well. Kate told Mat all about her ticket to spring break infamy drink while he debated if it was possible to have too much fun with Dinah.

Really? Do I need to say anything there?

Tyler: Is Dinah eighteen yet? If she's not, yeah, it's possible to have too much fun with her.

Tony: ...Tyler, you cad.

Tyler: Just being practical. Read more.

Tony: Effy was laying out, Karla... was being stalked by a sandbucket. Let's just move on from that. Dinah checked to see if Morgana was tanning instead of sitting in the shade or bursting into flames, I presume. Warren's wings were invisible--Tyler, we have someone on the island with wings?

Tyler: That falls on my list of shit I did not know that does not surprise me.

Tony: Maybe I should get out of the lab more often. Naomi was also sunning herself... this is just tedious, you know... Jool watched that frog thing drag a water bucket past her, Claudia and Angela enjoyed the spa, Jaina, Harper and Hannibal were both eating. Separately. Biff made the buffet a living hell while Ellie caught up with her brother at the deli. Makita and Rose did some rock climbing...

Tyler: Yes, you should get out of the lab more. And the resort's still there at night, when Didi and Dinah squee at each other over the nightclub and dolphins, Biff tries to hit on Ziva at the bar, and Rose and boy-Alex drink and bicker about who's older. We also have Tahiri telling Tara she's okay and Aravis and one of the Jacks discussing gambling preferences.

Christ, they took an official school trip to drink and gamble? ... and I skipped it?

Tony: I'll take you to Morocco this weekend and you can get drink, better?

Tyler: ... Much.

Tony: Just don't end up getting into a fight with some costumed idiot. Steve and Nathan would be heartbroken they couldn't watch.

Tyler: I won't face off against anything more dangerous than a camel. Promise.

Tony: Shelley was busy dancing at Pixie Dust when Castiel showed up to get her number. Man moves fast. I can appreciate that. And Marshall was at Caritas, avoiding the Olympics.

I don't know, the skiing has its appeal.

Tyler: I like luge. Nothing like a sport that depends on gravity.

Tony: You probably enjoyed that bobsled movie too.

Tyler: With the Jamaicans? That's a classic. ... there's a squirrel shoving more paper at me to get me to shut up about it. So in late-breaking news, Dimitri got a call from Rose during his hockey game and Castiel stares at paper and makes a call in the church rectory. And I think we're out.

Tony: How that rambling lunatic does this is beyond me.

Tyler: Let's call it a mystery for the ages. G'night.