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fandom_radio2009-01-25 02:12 am
trustshisbarber.livejournal.com) wrote in fandom_radio2009-01-25 02:12 am
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Fandom Radio, Saturday, January 24th
Good evening, Fandom. Listen up. It's time for the news and this is your host - voted in by you, the smarter people of Fandom - J. Jonah Jameson. It's a big day on the island. Not only do we have a police officer convention called CopCon going on - and I would like to take a moment to thank the legitimate members of the law enforcement community who are joining us this weekend for all the work they've done keeping people safe from all kinds of menaces, masked or otherwise - but it seems there was a birthday party as well as other assorted social gatherings on a much smaller scale.
Starting off tonight's broadcast, SCHOOL.
It was a quiet day in the halls of Fandom High today as there was no detention today. Mac was in the library, where it had better be quiet per the typical rules of a library. She read a play. I'm glad to hear there were no pajamas involved this time and that she seemed to be doing her job.
Moving on to DORMS now.
It was a quiet day in the halls of Fandom High's dorms, too. Sammy - I'm embarrassed just saying that name. I'm calling you Sam. That's a real name. SAM brought Dean a birthday pie... Really? If you can't even get birthday junk food right, you don't deserve a real name. SAMMY and Dean then arranged going to a 3D movie of some sort. It was probably a terrible movie. Would you trust the movie opinions of a person who doesn't know what kind of food you bring people on their birthday? Not if you're smart, you wouldn't.
Meanwhile, Leto has a vision, which worried his roommate, Arthur. And I'm having a vision, too. Despite the slow start, it's still going to end up being a busy news night. Let's take a look at my notes...
Yep. There's a lot to go, so let's move on quickly to TOWNIES.
Let's get the quick stuff out of the way first. Buffy had a more reasonable name than Sammy as she patrolled this evening. Emmett talked to her about the weather and Snuggies... Again with the Snuggies. My world centers around Snuggies recently. I'm going to buy some and burn them, I've just decided that. Meanwhile, Angua hunted squirrels... Really? But the squirrels stole her clothes. Okay, which one of you is making this crap up?
Fine, don't talk now. But I'll find out when I'm off the air.
And Davis chatted with Buffy about the weather too. Because apparently nobody here has anything better to talk about. Potential conversation topics for next Saturday to keep me from having to talk about people talking about the weather again: the Super Bowl, monkeys, whatever music is popular today, how great a newsman I am, anything but the weather.
Marion opened Caritas in a supposedly timely manner, giving both Ronon and Peter the chance to have a beer, not with each other. Brendan and John shared a face, which confused Ronan and Lindsay, and with good reason. I'm not even sure what it means and I reported it. Angua - presumably wearing clothes now - asked about something that had better be the name of a drink, leading Daisy to explain it. "It" being, we can only hope, the name of a drink. No, I'm not naming the drink. Get your filthy drink names off the internet if you want them. Just know that it could be any of at least three hundred drinks with inappropriate names.
And the cops just kept coming into the bar. Dirk bought Deb a drink, A.J. had a beer, and Harry thought he would have a nice, quiet night with nobody disappearing on him before Lindsay yelled at him for sleeping with someone. Unfortunately, it was a case of mistaken identity. Well, unfortunate for Harry. Fortunate for me. It's hilarious to me.
Fiona was at the bar until Michael showed up, leading them to get a table in the lounge.
We're done with the bar? Great! Tony was working on a project when he got a visit from Tyler, the flatware was hiding at Cafe Fina, and Daisy was picking up a coffee order at the Perk. Did she meet people there? Of course she did. She met Connor and Brennan, while Dinah also met up with Connor. Apparently he knows her in another reality. Welcome to Fandom, kids!
Charlotte was at York Gallery with Mina, Turtle was at her store with someone named Bester... Sammy is a better name than that... and Ino was at the clinic with Ichigo. Hurley opened Groovy Tunes, Viki worked at the Arms, and our mayor listed to last night's broadcast at his store
Don't think for a second that we're done, though. I'm just getting warmed up.
Cal had a BIRTHDAY PARTY at Chilly Bolder tonight and from the stack of notes, it looks like everyone who wasn't in the dorms or school - which means pretty much everyone - was there.
As should be the case at any decent party, there was socializing. Worf apparently didn't realize this and had to deal with Dojima, who later talked to Angela about toplessness. Amber talked about a play and/or relationships with Angela and Dinah. Amber then discussed her ankle with Ino and ice cream with Liir.
Everyone seemed concerned about how tired and/or bad Ino looked, 'everyone' in this case meaning Tony, Liir, and Dojima.
Dinah was welcomed to the party by Dojima. Then she talked about the convention with Angela, love with Merlin, Ino's status as a ninja, the play with Liir, and she even talked about talking with Leto, which really feels like she was just trying to pad this section of notes. It's still better than talking about weather, though.
Leto - also greeted by Dojima - spoke with Tony about the play... I'm beginning to think that everyone on the island but me is in this play. That's probably just a problem with perspective right now, but until I get farther away from the issue, I'm going to be convinced that this is the case. I WAS ROBBED OF WHATEVER ROLE WOULD WORK FOR ME! Ahem. Leto also discussed ice cream with Merlin.
Hoshi talked in Japanese with Dojima and Temari, meaning that I neither know nor care what they were talking about. To be fair, though, I also wouldn't care what they said if they were talking in English, German, French, Pig Latin, or Esperanto, although I would be slightly intrigued by that last one. And I don't really care about what any teenagers say to each other. I'll report it, but there's a definite detachment that I think serves both you and me.
Dojima really just kept greeting people including Penelope, Mac, Tony, Merlin, and Claire, who didn't know that her boyfriend's birthday was today. I can tell that girl's never going to be an investigating journalist.
Leto discussed his sister with Penelope... He brings his sister being a teacher up a lot. It's still better than talking about the weather. She also talked about missions with Ino and exchanged waves with Liir. Speaking of Liir, he and Merlin managed to avoid having any substantial conversation, boldly choosing not to socialize while everyone else was. History won't remember your sacrifice, gentlemen, but I will. For five more seconds. Three, two, one, moving on.
Merlin and Tony talked about a dance... Is there a dance? I'm not chaperoning. Don't think you can make me. Penelope chatted with Hurley, while Claire talked to Ino, and then there was ice cream. Amber quizzed Liir about her birthday over ice cream. If anyone knows what my birthday is, please call the radio station and you'll win a prize. Time's up! Congratulations, I'm the winner. And my prize is moving on to Cal's birthday wishes. Hooray.
Temari gave him some non-traditional smacks on the arm and mocked his age... Heh, I like her style. Ino gave him a hug, which is the greatest gift of all aside from an actual gift, Claire gave him sarcasm, and Amber gave him a surpise by showing up. Leto and Dinah also wished him a happy birthday, and Dojima was smug that the party was a big success that I've had to talk about for the past several minutes. If she were in my class, I'd find a way to give her detention for this.
The following people had conversations relating to the weather: Angela and Ino, Dinah and Tony, Liir and Tony. Find better topics.
Finally, Cal had presents.
And there's still more news tonight!
Finally, COPCON.
Doctor Temperance Brennan started the morning with a lecture on forensic anthropology, leading to a conversation with Angel that confused the crap out of both of them. The audience was fairly quiet for her, showing the proper respect to a trained professional like Doctor Brennan. After the lecture, Dinah pestered the doctor for an autograph.
Batman held a workshop on scaring the bejeezus out of people and is there any wonder why I call all of these masked menaces out as the blights on society that they are? This guy's just proving me right. Jack suggested mocking instead of scaring, and let me tell you that having a smartass in a mask is worse than having a psychopath in a mask. Trust me on this. Alex pointed out that this Batman was likely doing more harm than good, while two other costumed heroes made asses of themselves. Fiona, Don, and Angel proved themselves to be worse menaces than the guy on the stage when they explained just why excessive violence was so great. Ben got off-topic by talking about governments. And the audience was filled with menaces and smart people who disliked the topic in general.
Don lectured on superheroes and their inability to retire. I'd be willing to deal with that if it meant that they were simply driven away by the innocent citizens who have to deal with them. Ben asked about not getting paid for beinga hero, Jack abused the word "scruples," the audience talked amongst themselves, and someone offered to buy Don a drink.
The convention continued in the afternoon with Booster Gold promoting making money while superheroing. Masked. Menaces. Do you need more proof? Blue Beetle and Don were both offended by an ad shown in the lecture, while Dinah concerned herself with a more practical issue with the workshop. Jack, meanwhile, focused on the cost of the ad. And some moron thought he'd be funny by declaring himself a kleptomaniac after talking about it in the audience. Booster Gold stuck around after the workshop, but nobody wanted to talk to the costumed threat to the common person.
Keith and Veronica Mars conducted a workshop on stakeouts. Fiona was focused on how boring stakeouts can be, first asking a question about that and then talking about it with Michael while Dinah and Peter discussed pizza in the audience.
ADA Alex Cabot hosted a workshop on following the rules, which means she's probably the most rational person at this convention. Reno asked about randomly beating up criminals, Nick asked about using hypnotism, Jack asked about jurisdiction issues that he can't go into detail about, and Z brought up communities that didn't even have trials.
These are the kind of people attending our conventions.
Ben also asked ADA Cabot about people who are above the law. I'll tell you about that, son. NOBODY is above the law. And anyone who thinks they are will learn better eventually."
And believe it or not, there were still workshops in the evening. Jill and Lindsay ran one on cooperation, which, of course, turned into a shouting match. Not even CopCon can escape irony. Jack asked about cooperating when nobody agreed. Loki used his time to tease Lindsay instead of being productive in any way while Lindsay used her time on stage to gape at Brendan. Good job. Shawn and Gus, meanwhile, brought the entire thing down by talking about the presenters wrestling in Jell-o, which isn't appropriate in any way. They're nearly as bad as the two superheroes. AJ had a legitimate question, but it's not even worth discussing as far as I'm concerned with the way everyone else brought the workshop down.
Nick and Angel lectured on being vampire detectives, which seems like it would be aimed at a very narrow audience. Jack was stunned, Tony was curious, Angel was grumpy, and Dinah was focused on dating. They're too old for you. And they're vampires.
The audience was busy, even though it had nothing to do with the lecture. Brendan confused more people, Logan and Veronica talked about her father, and Dinah made Tony come in for research.
Finally, Davis and Pelly... worse than Sammy... had a workshop on handling crank calls to the police and were on hand to answer questions. My only question? You're making me end with that?
Fine. This has been J. Jonah Jameson for WTFH news.
[OOC: Sorry for the slight delay. There was brief RL socialness and then A LOT OF LINKS.]
Starting off tonight's broadcast, SCHOOL.
It was a quiet day in the halls of Fandom High today as there was no detention today. Mac was in the library, where it had better be quiet per the typical rules of a library. She read a play. I'm glad to hear there were no pajamas involved this time and that she seemed to be doing her job.
Moving on to DORMS now.
It was a quiet day in the halls of Fandom High's dorms, too. Sammy - I'm embarrassed just saying that name. I'm calling you Sam. That's a real name. SAM brought Dean a birthday pie... Really? If you can't even get birthday junk food right, you don't deserve a real name. SAMMY and Dean then arranged going to a 3D movie of some sort. It was probably a terrible movie. Would you trust the movie opinions of a person who doesn't know what kind of food you bring people on their birthday? Not if you're smart, you wouldn't.
Meanwhile, Leto has a vision, which worried his roommate, Arthur. And I'm having a vision, too. Despite the slow start, it's still going to end up being a busy news night. Let's take a look at my notes...
Yep. There's a lot to go, so let's move on quickly to TOWNIES.
Let's get the quick stuff out of the way first. Buffy had a more reasonable name than Sammy as she patrolled this evening. Emmett talked to her about the weather and Snuggies... Again with the Snuggies. My world centers around Snuggies recently. I'm going to buy some and burn them, I've just decided that. Meanwhile, Angua hunted squirrels... Really? But the squirrels stole her clothes. Okay, which one of you is making this crap up?
Fine, don't talk now. But I'll find out when I'm off the air.
And Davis chatted with Buffy about the weather too. Because apparently nobody here has anything better to talk about. Potential conversation topics for next Saturday to keep me from having to talk about people talking about the weather again: the Super Bowl, monkeys, whatever music is popular today, how great a newsman I am, anything but the weather.
Marion opened Caritas in a supposedly timely manner, giving both Ronon and Peter the chance to have a beer, not with each other. Brendan and John shared a face, which confused Ronan and Lindsay, and with good reason. I'm not even sure what it means and I reported it. Angua - presumably wearing clothes now - asked about something that had better be the name of a drink, leading Daisy to explain it. "It" being, we can only hope, the name of a drink. No, I'm not naming the drink. Get your filthy drink names off the internet if you want them. Just know that it could be any of at least three hundred drinks with inappropriate names.
And the cops just kept coming into the bar. Dirk bought Deb a drink, A.J. had a beer, and Harry thought he would have a nice, quiet night with nobody disappearing on him before Lindsay yelled at him for sleeping with someone. Unfortunately, it was a case of mistaken identity. Well, unfortunate for Harry. Fortunate for me. It's hilarious to me.
Fiona was at the bar until Michael showed up, leading them to get a table in the lounge.
We're done with the bar? Great! Tony was working on a project when he got a visit from Tyler, the flatware was hiding at Cafe Fina, and Daisy was picking up a coffee order at the Perk. Did she meet people there? Of course she did. She met Connor and Brennan, while Dinah also met up with Connor. Apparently he knows her in another reality. Welcome to Fandom, kids!
Charlotte was at York Gallery with Mina, Turtle was at her store with someone named Bester... Sammy is a better name than that... and Ino was at the clinic with Ichigo. Hurley opened Groovy Tunes, Viki worked at the Arms, and our mayor listed to last night's broadcast at his store
Don't think for a second that we're done, though. I'm just getting warmed up.
Cal had a BIRTHDAY PARTY at Chilly Bolder tonight and from the stack of notes, it looks like everyone who wasn't in the dorms or school - which means pretty much everyone - was there.
As should be the case at any decent party, there was socializing. Worf apparently didn't realize this and had to deal with Dojima, who later talked to Angela about toplessness. Amber talked about a play and/or relationships with Angela and Dinah. Amber then discussed her ankle with Ino and ice cream with Liir.
Everyone seemed concerned about how tired and/or bad Ino looked, 'everyone' in this case meaning Tony, Liir, and Dojima.
Dinah was welcomed to the party by Dojima. Then she talked about the convention with Angela, love with Merlin, Ino's status as a ninja, the play with Liir, and she even talked about talking with Leto, which really feels like she was just trying to pad this section of notes. It's still better than talking about weather, though.
Leto - also greeted by Dojima - spoke with Tony about the play... I'm beginning to think that everyone on the island but me is in this play. That's probably just a problem with perspective right now, but until I get farther away from the issue, I'm going to be convinced that this is the case. I WAS ROBBED OF WHATEVER ROLE WOULD WORK FOR ME! Ahem. Leto also discussed ice cream with Merlin.
Hoshi talked in Japanese with Dojima and Temari, meaning that I neither know nor care what they were talking about. To be fair, though, I also wouldn't care what they said if they were talking in English, German, French, Pig Latin, or Esperanto, although I would be slightly intrigued by that last one. And I don't really care about what any teenagers say to each other. I'll report it, but there's a definite detachment that I think serves both you and me.
Dojima really just kept greeting people including Penelope, Mac, Tony, Merlin, and Claire, who didn't know that her boyfriend's birthday was today. I can tell that girl's never going to be an investigating journalist.
Leto discussed his sister with Penelope... He brings his sister being a teacher up a lot. It's still better than talking about the weather. She also talked about missions with Ino and exchanged waves with Liir. Speaking of Liir, he and Merlin managed to avoid having any substantial conversation, boldly choosing not to socialize while everyone else was. History won't remember your sacrifice, gentlemen, but I will. For five more seconds. Three, two, one, moving on.
Merlin and Tony talked about a dance... Is there a dance? I'm not chaperoning. Don't think you can make me. Penelope chatted with Hurley, while Claire talked to Ino, and then there was ice cream. Amber quizzed Liir about her birthday over ice cream. If anyone knows what my birthday is, please call the radio station and you'll win a prize. Time's up! Congratulations, I'm the winner. And my prize is moving on to Cal's birthday wishes. Hooray.
Temari gave him some non-traditional smacks on the arm and mocked his age... Heh, I like her style. Ino gave him a hug, which is the greatest gift of all aside from an actual gift, Claire gave him sarcasm, and Amber gave him a surpise by showing up. Leto and Dinah also wished him a happy birthday, and Dojima was smug that the party was a big success that I've had to talk about for the past several minutes. If she were in my class, I'd find a way to give her detention for this.
The following people had conversations relating to the weather: Angela and Ino, Dinah and Tony, Liir and Tony. Find better topics.
Finally, Cal had presents.
And there's still more news tonight!
Finally, COPCON.
Doctor Temperance Brennan started the morning with a lecture on forensic anthropology, leading to a conversation with Angel that confused the crap out of both of them. The audience was fairly quiet for her, showing the proper respect to a trained professional like Doctor Brennan. After the lecture, Dinah pestered the doctor for an autograph.
Batman held a workshop on scaring the bejeezus out of people and is there any wonder why I call all of these masked menaces out as the blights on society that they are? This guy's just proving me right. Jack suggested mocking instead of scaring, and let me tell you that having a smartass in a mask is worse than having a psychopath in a mask. Trust me on this. Alex pointed out that this Batman was likely doing more harm than good, while two other costumed heroes made asses of themselves. Fiona, Don, and Angel proved themselves to be worse menaces than the guy on the stage when they explained just why excessive violence was so great. Ben got off-topic by talking about governments. And the audience was filled with menaces and smart people who disliked the topic in general.
Don lectured on superheroes and their inability to retire. I'd be willing to deal with that if it meant that they were simply driven away by the innocent citizens who have to deal with them. Ben asked about not getting paid for beinga hero, Jack abused the word "scruples," the audience talked amongst themselves, and someone offered to buy Don a drink.
The convention continued in the afternoon with Booster Gold promoting making money while superheroing. Masked. Menaces. Do you need more proof? Blue Beetle and Don were both offended by an ad shown in the lecture, while Dinah concerned herself with a more practical issue with the workshop. Jack, meanwhile, focused on the cost of the ad. And some moron thought he'd be funny by declaring himself a kleptomaniac after talking about it in the audience. Booster Gold stuck around after the workshop, but nobody wanted to talk to the costumed threat to the common person.
Keith and Veronica Mars conducted a workshop on stakeouts. Fiona was focused on how boring stakeouts can be, first asking a question about that and then talking about it with Michael while Dinah and Peter discussed pizza in the audience.
ADA Alex Cabot hosted a workshop on following the rules, which means she's probably the most rational person at this convention. Reno asked about randomly beating up criminals, Nick asked about using hypnotism, Jack asked about jurisdiction issues that he can't go into detail about, and Z brought up communities that didn't even have trials.
These are the kind of people attending our conventions.
Ben also asked ADA Cabot about people who are above the law. I'll tell you about that, son. NOBODY is above the law. And anyone who thinks they are will learn better eventually."
And believe it or not, there were still workshops in the evening. Jill and Lindsay ran one on cooperation, which, of course, turned into a shouting match. Not even CopCon can escape irony. Jack asked about cooperating when nobody agreed. Loki used his time to tease Lindsay instead of being productive in any way while Lindsay used her time on stage to gape at Brendan. Good job. Shawn and Gus, meanwhile, brought the entire thing down by talking about the presenters wrestling in Jell-o, which isn't appropriate in any way. They're nearly as bad as the two superheroes. AJ had a legitimate question, but it's not even worth discussing as far as I'm concerned with the way everyone else brought the workshop down.
Nick and Angel lectured on being vampire detectives, which seems like it would be aimed at a very narrow audience. Jack was stunned, Tony was curious, Angel was grumpy, and Dinah was focused on dating. They're too old for you. And they're vampires.
The audience was busy, even though it had nothing to do with the lecture. Brendan confused more people, Logan and Veronica talked about her father, and Dinah made Tony come in for research.
Finally, Davis and Pelly... worse than Sammy... had a workshop on handling crank calls to the police and were on hand to answer questions. My only question? You're making me end with that?
Fine. This has been J. Jonah Jameson for WTFH news.
[OOC: Sorry for the slight delay. There was brief RL socialness and then A LOT OF LINKS.]
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