Fandom Radio, Tuesday, March 6

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

Deadpool: "Hello Fandom! My esteemed and creepy co-host could not join us tonight so instead we have two very special guests!"

Rosette: "There's so many buttons and lights and...oooh, what's this do? We're not on yet, are we?...Wait, what's....Is this rum? It is! ....Oh, bugger; I can't even have any. What a bust."

Yuki: "When I say I HAVE TO WORK' does that not mean anything to anyone?"

Rosette: "You always say that, and yet....I never see you do any actual work. Huh."

Deadpool: "Because he secretly glad that we kidnap him. Look at that pissed of expression. It's just masking the deep down love he feels."

Rosette: "And this is coming from a man who knows a lot about masks, folks."

Deadpool: "This is true folks."

School

Rosette: Driver's Ed met today, which meant those students got to spend time with my esteemed masked co-host here, you lucky kids, you. Y'know, Deadpool, you should have me come help one of days. I'm an excellent driver."

Yuki: "I'm a good driver. In more ways than one."

Deadpool: "Psst. He means in bed."

Rosette: "Oh, is that what he was suggesting? I had no idea. Because I'm an innocent nun who doesn't think like that, you know. Anyway, to keep with the recent weather trends, they drove in the rain. Jude, Buffy, Demyx, Mel, and Door all were behind the wheel today, with a supposed zero-percent occurrence of death, but a one-hundred-percent occurrence of really messed up names. Seriously, you guys. You had some mightily creative or sadistic parents. And, yes, I know. Making fun of people's names on radio is quite creative in and of itself. Shut up."

Yuki: "At least Nova wasn't involved. But I just have no idea about that kid. Though... of the names Door and Nova... I can't decide which is better to laugh at."

Rosette: "Door. Definitely. In Zen Computer Science, they're going over the basics. Is that the basics of Zen, Computers, or Science? I think I could use all three, really. And, since Mr. Logan Cale is new to teaching this class, he had the students introduce themselves. Hi, Logan! I'm not in your class, but I thought I'd introduce myself, too. I'm Sister Rosette. I live in a church basement. *snerk* And then they look up computer science on wik..on wiki...wikiped....I have no idea what that word is."

Deadpool: "Wikipedia. It was on the Colbert Report, the best news program there is."

Rosette: "Oh! And Advance Tactics talked about snakes on a plane! Or, at least, light air crafts and vipers. Close enough."

Deadpool: "Bring it! Superheroing 101 talked to a reporter, Rita Skeeter. Never heard of her. Hannelore taught about cleaning in Home Ec for Emma today. Why? Where'd Emma go? Did she leave for home over break and then the mansion got destroyed again? Or did Jean come back from the dead as evil AGAIN?"

Rosette: "...Is Emma the one who was at Yuki's party? Y'know, the one with the hmmm and the haaa, but wasn't a stripper?"

Yuki: *mumbles* "I don't know why ANYONE came in the first place..."

Deadpool: "Because we loooove yoooouu! Aeryn got waved at by a giant iPod sometime while there was cleaning of the classroom. Tyler then tried to explain to Hannelore that he was the T.A. and that he had been stuck in a locker. Isn't it the closet, not a locker? And if that's the case, I'm glad you're out. You could help another certain minion with that problem."

Yuki: "What, like you?"

Rosette: Minion, Yuki. He said minion. *whispers* We call that wishful thinking, folks."

Deadpool: "Thank you Rosette. Bridge took over Revolutions for Aly, in what is hopefully not another coup. They then went over ways to improve on Jamie's revolution. Here's an idea: pay the merc more so he doesn't betray you in the end."

Yuki: "You're lucky they pay you at all for the job you do."

Deadpool: "I am an excellent teacher! Just ask all my students! Parker and Kawalsky threw paper airplanes at each other in some sort of adorable flirty fight. And then there was staring between Jamie and Marie. Sexual tension? Hatred? You decide."

Rosette: "Both?"

Yuki: "When in doubt, pick the sex."

Deadpool: "Wise words. Yondie had office hours today and I was his only visitor because after me? No one is ever good enough. Laura Roslin was visited by Honor Harrington, whose name makes me want to keep using h words."

Yuki: "I have an "h" word for you..."

Deadpool: "Is it horny? Speaking of horns, Lorne. The office opened once again today."

Yuki: "I was actually thinking of ham. Way to misconstrue my meaning."

Rosette: "I was thinking horticulture."

Yuki: "I have no retort for that. But I feel the urge to hit you. Another wonderful "h" word."

Rosette: "Oh, Yuki, I love it when you get all violent. It's so cute."

Deadpool: "He's naughty, isn't he? Dr. Not Me had office hours and was visited by two lovely ladies, Marie and Tori the stripper and two... not so lovely ladies? Well I don't think I know this Blair kid, but I'm pretty sure Aziraphale isn't a lovely lady. Despite not being a lovely lady, he had office hours as well and was visited by Miley and Lana. He then sent a note to his mentees, as did Dr. Not Me."

Yuki: "Being a mentor is a big responsibility."

Deadpool: "That's why I take my duties seriously. Sam whose last name is a gun opened the library and was accused by Dean of making a Sim!Alec. And then given prezzies. After which he was visited by Alec, who told him about his spring break and we are still unsure whether or not is a Sim."

Rosette: "What is a Sim? Do I want to know?"

Deadpool: "A highly addictive video game. Stop by the house and I'll show you sometime. Alone. In my room. Dueling Club met and actually got with the dueling. Nice! Dr. Not!Strange was around for the talking to if you enjoy that overly dramatic dreamy tone of his."

Rosette: "It is kinda sex-ay, isn't i-- Okay, no, I'm sorry. I can't say that with a straight face. But Dr. Orpheus is a very distinguished gentleman with a fine mastery of the art of necromancy. ....Rawr."

Yuki: "He's got a book with a face."

Rosette: "....Hot."

Yuki: "I think that takes bibliophile to a new low."

Deadpool: "Kinda gross now. What is still the best club ever, Young Entrepreneurs met and discussed product ideas and did some general networking. I was there in case they needed any help. I'm good with business like that."

Rosette: "You're helping with a business club? That's...a wee bit scary. What isn't scary is Annette and Chad together at lunch today. They were adorable with a capital A. Awwwww starts with an A, too."

Dorms

Yuki: "What else starts with an A? I don't even care. On to the dorms. We keep coed dorms here? You kids must be scoring every night. No wonder your so unresponsive during class. A couple of people were taking advantage of the opposite sex today. First of all some kid named John scores early. Way to start the day off right. I commend you kid. Next Lana and Jim enjoy a bit of afternoon delight. It's good to have something to get you through the day. You kids sure are busy. Marie and Jamie were 'duplicating' in her room. For some reason it’s kinkier to say duplicating than sex.

Deadpool: "Well, with him, they might actually be duplicating."

Yuki: "Look, I'm sure there was sex going on. I know these things. But here’s a funny story. This girl’s boyfriend…. Girlfriend? Came over to our house the other day and yelled at Deadpool. Anyway, it looks like that… guy… girl… is out of luck. She’s cheating on him for some girl named Rikku.

Deadpool: "Minions! I am shocked!"

Rosette: "And appalled?"

Deadpool: "Is there any other way to be?"

Yuki: "Marty and Angela have a happy reunion, but it’s sorely lacking in steamy sex. Shame on you both. Ugh… Can I leave yet? Tyler meets Annette after being freed from a locker. Only losers get stuck in lockers, Annette. Best to avoid this Tyler kid.

Deadpool: "Don't you listen to him Annette, Tyler is a fine upstanding minion."

Yuki: "Two guys, Cedric and Jack, were busy feeding a fish. No need to be coy. We know what you really did. Speaking of this Cedric. He was visited by someone named Sam to talk about his fight with Jack. Rest assured Sam, sometimes it looks a bit like wrestling but it’s all in good fun. Just don’t forget to have a safety word."

Deadpool: "Oh! That's what we forgot!"

Rosette: "Hot dog. Remember. Hot dog....Hot. Doggggg. *sound of stomach rumbling* Ugh. Stupid Lent. Now I can't stop thinking about how badly I just want a nice, big, fat, juicy hot dog....

Deadpool: *whimper* "...Chimichanga?"

Yuki: "Lana and Jack pout. The best cure? Sex. Seems like once a day isn’t enough for either of you. I like your style. Oh hey. I know Nadia. Apparently she was meditating with Pippi. No sex? Nadia, I’m afraid we’ll have to talk about this tomorrow. I’m ashamed.
That Tyler kid gets recapping from Jamie. If he didn’t give you details about his earlier “duplicating” then he’s no friend of yours. Phobe and Bel have a mushy reunion. Hah. Feelings. It’s not a movie you two. Get with the important stuff. By that I mean the sex.

Rosette: "Did you know that you said 'sex' six times in that, and referenced it with every single one, Yuki? Is Shuichi still sick so you're feeling a little...deprived, hm?"

Deadpool: "...I'm locking my door."

Yuki: "As if I'd EVER get that desperate..."

Deadpool: "Uh-huh. We believe you, right Rosette?"

Rosette: "Totally. Almost as much as I believe in God. And, this morning, Tori beat the snot out of a punching bag. Stripper Tori? As in, my stripper Tori? Or a different one? Either way, a good lesson. Don't mess with strippers. They're a tough lot. That's why I'll be their patron saint."

Yuki: "For something that’s inherently cool to most people, we look to Irulan and Parker, who were allegedly knife-fighting in the gym."

Deadpool: "A knife fight and I wasn't invited?!"

Rosette: "If they start using guns, then I'm going to be upset over the inclusiveness, too."

Yuki: “I guess you all enjoy being soaking wet. And that’s not dirty for once. Billy finds it “soothing.” Jim goes walking in it like it’s no big deal. Way to act like a badass. Teddy finds puddles fun and Tori is also goofing around in the rain. Is the water some kind of a GAME for you people?!”

Deadpool: "...yes? Why are you always so full of rage? Do you need a hug?"

Rosette: "Definately needs a hug. *glomp*"

Yuki: “GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME! Ahem. Annette has a wee. And she’s trying to set it up. It usually does it on it’s own. You just need the right moment. Apparently, that moment was when Tori came along and gave her some help. Help is always nice. I’m guessing that Dick discussing skirts didn’t help quite as much as Tori did. Unless you’re into that kind of thing. Sokka was there too, possibly just watching all the hot “wee” action. And there was an animal there too. That’s one kinky common room.”

Deadpool: "Why must you look for dirty things with the students? Why can't you just accept our looooove?"

Rosette: "Look for dirty things? Deadpool. Come on. You don't need a magnifying class to notice that lovefest, yeeesh. Annette, Tori, Richard, Sokka. All of you. Confessions are Monday. Got it?"

Yuki: "And I love no one. Got it?"

Town

Rosette: "Hey, did you know it's raining? If you didn't, seriously. Go outside. Or get a window, or something. Because there's a lot of it."

Yuki: "Thank god you let us know."

Rosette: "Everyone except for River and John missed Alamo Day at the church, which is a shame, because it was a lot of fun."

Deadpool: "I was at work!"

Yuki: "I have the same excuse. Except no one seems to believe me when I say it."

Rosette: "Uh-huh. And then John Connor finally grew a pair and admitted he totally wants me. Took you long enough, John!"

Deadpool: "John? Lil' buddy? GET IN LINE."

Rosette: "No, no, no, y'see, he was there before there even was a line, so, yeah. Been waitin' forever for this."

Yuki: I'm afraid I have to agree with Deadpool on this one. You're OUR hot nun.

Rosette: "Better step up, then, boys! Heh. So, over at Empire today, Kaylee talked with River and Conner....wait, John? Oh, no, it's spelled differently....I think....Anyway, she talked to them about going to Serenity, which sounds very religious, and so I wish you luck and guidance on your spiritual quest, Kaylee. Which means a lot. 'Cause I'm a nun and all. The Post Office was a little busy today, and the notes here say that Annette, Xander, and Setsuna all went to Moist with...Oh my God, I'm a nun! Are you sure it's okay for me to be reading this out loud? This just sounds dirty...."

Deadpool: "Dirty would be like what Yuki said."

Rosette: " Everything Yuki says is dirty. But his is sexy-dirty. This is just....gross dirty. Apparently, though, Laura avoided the postal orgy at her mailbox, which doesn't surprise me, because she goes to church. Good for her."

Deadpool: "So, churchgoers are anti-orgy? That's sad."

Yuki: "We'll convince you yet Rosette..."

Rosette: "Haven't you enough already? So, Teddy opened Sparky's and nothing excited happened. Probably because I don't visit as much anymore to keep those Sparky's kids on their toes. And then they were offering music with dinner at Cafe Fina and-- Hey! Deadpool, we didn't get musical accompaniment when we went there. What gives, Candle-boy? Oh, and, Yuki, you still owe me a date, remember."

Yuki: "That's not all I owe you."

Deadpool: "He also owes you a cake."

Rosette: "CAAAAKE! Anyway, at the Photo Hut, Leo's playing with his pupp-- Again with the I don't think I can read this because I'm a nun! UGH."

Deadpool: "Maybe you just have a dirty mind."

Rosette: "Me? Come on. In the park this evening, Agatha...who I really need to meet already, jeez. Hi, Agatha! I love your store! Even if you did dismantle John's still....bitch. Anyway, Billy and John got together with her and practiced sword techniques. Which just sounds kinky and yet another thing I should have probably not have read."

Yuki: "Kinky radio commentary by nuns is not a crime in this country. As far as I know."

Rosette: "If it was, it is a silly crime, indeed. It's also a crime that Caritas was so quiet for Jane's shift. I would have stopped in to say hi if I'd known, and then probably end up crying because I can't drink right now."

Deadpool: "Does communal wine count?"

Rosette: "That.....is a really good question. Wow. I'm really going to look into that now. And Shuichi, who is not a bad kisser at all, Yuki, I found this out for myself, thank you....he was working the Nest tonight and Yon...die...may...ooof, that's a name for ya...stopped by. Whether or not he also verified the quality of Shuichi's kisses is unknown, but, Yondaime, I highly suggest you try!"

Deadpool: "Don't do it Yondie! He's just a kid!"

Yuki: "I ought to kill you both. You're aware he's a year OLDER than Rosette aren't you?"

Deadpool: "Maybe because she doesn't act like a kid. This just in! John Crichton is a wombat. For real or is this some new insult?"

Rosette: "Better a new insult than a dirty sex game, I'm thinking. Have you ever seen a wombat?"

Yuki: "... There's too much wrong with that sentence. Not even I would try to mess with that."

Rosette: "The clinic was really busy today; I'm not sure if it's because there was a sexy doctor on duty or if it was just a lot of people wanting to see Ami and . I don't know who either of those girls are, but I hope they get well soon. Especially since no one's coming to visit them or the ninja at night. ...Wait a second. Did I really read that right? A ninja doctor?....I love this town."

Yuki: "What do ninjas know about medicine? Honestly."

Rosette: "*whispers* Pssst. Ninja Doctor. Yuki lives at 25 Unicorn Street, if you feel the need to kill him in his sleep for doubting your medical abilities. He's the blond one. The blond one."

Deadpool: "I believe the better question is: What do doctors know about ninja-ing?"

Rosette: "Truly one of life's great mysteries. With that deep, spiritual consideration, we shall bid you good night, Fandom. And pray for you all that the ninja doctors don't get you in your sleep. ...Unless you're Yuki."

Yuki: "I hate you all. Death would be a welcome blessing."

Deadpool: "GROUP HUG!"

Comments

[sexycandlepants.livejournal.com]

"Trust me," Lumiere mumbled at the radio, "When it is 'ze pepper shaker singing, you aren't missing anything."
And he resumed downing the bottle of wine that he had been contemplating all day.

[sensethevisions]

Phoebe really thought that Deadpool should mind his own business when it comes to other people's love lives.

[water-wonder.livejournal.com]

Tori headdesked. "I am not a stripper, thank you very much!" She knew they wouldn't be able to hear her, but still.

[OOC: Bwahahaha, you all rule!]

[henryoredward.livejournal.com]

OOC: And pray for you all that the ninja doctors don't get you in your sleep. ...Unless you're Yuki.

Fantastic amazing.

[konoha-flash.livejournal.com]

Arashi smacked his forehead. "I told him to stop calling me Yondie"

[badluckprodigy.livejournal.com]

"EEK! How could she say that on the air?! YUKI, WHY ARE YOU SUCH A FILTHY BASTARD!!! You're all so vulgar!! No wonder I never listen to the radio!!! YUUUKIIIiiiiii...." Flop.

[apocalypsesoon.livejournal.com]

John listened to the radio. And flailed.
John hates you all. 'cept Rosette. :D *luff*