Fandom Radio, Tuesday May 24th

[lockestheway]

Good morning, students! I'd like to thank you all for voting me into this position-- ow-- and I hope to acclimatize to our hard-working staff-- OW!-- as soon as possible. I know we all appreciate their-- CUT IT OUT-- input and dedication to the craft of kidnapping people news-gathering.

*thwock*

No, seriously, do that one more time and we're done here.

*thwock*

I'm looking at you. Ahem. Sorry for that interruption, everyone. Hopefully it won't turn into a regular problem. Everyone needs some time to get used to each other, am I right? Good.

So here's everything you did yesterday. Within reason, of course.


GOIN' TO CLASS

Kicking off our class schedule today was miss Hermione with her lecture on why it's important to be prepared. For example, the island your parents shuffled you off to might wind up moving to Tokyo overnight! Though shopping wouldn't have been the first thing I thought of... eh, everyone's got their thing, right?

Mister Bond took a more hands-on approach to proper preparations by locking his students into situations, such as a study, a fish, and an island. You figure it out, folks... which one of these does not belong?

In Destiny and Free Will class, miss Atreides talked about the difference between fate and destiny. I assume at least one of these includes proper preparation, so we'll keep swinging with this theme. The whole hullabaloo gets discussed, including vocabulary issues and the existence of free will. Jim and Jason dug in deep about whether fate precluded free will if every path led to the same destination. Useful stuff, guys.

And finally, mister Rogers gave everyone an object lesson in proper preparation by letting them warm up before running hard. And crawling through the mud. Oooh, lads and ladettes, that can't have been fun. Cool down afterwards had to have been a relief. Professor Rogers was there to talk to, presumably right up until Tony caught him turning into a turkey. So much for good prepwork.

DORMS - WHERE HALF YOU GUYS LIVE

*chittering* *thwock*

Ow.

Uh. What I meant was, joyous news! Nathan isn't dead after all! A couple of people were by to give him a happy welcome, like Ramona, who gave him a big kiss after clocking him one. Caroline was also terribly pleased to see him, which she demonstrated by throwing a hair dryer at him. Continuing the trend Ramona started was Kate, who socked him but good. I hope you're speeding down to the clinic right now, buddy, because it sounds like you're going to wind up with a heck of a shiner.

Jack Carter was happy to hear he made it on the air today. Welcome to the team, Jack! In slightly less happy tidings, Roy turned into a raccoon, Spock turned into a crab and Alex turned into a dog. Are we sure they didn't just run off together, because that sounds a hell of a lot more plausible. Someone should ask Wesley, who played fetch with the dog, or Momoko, who was making a perfectly sensible point about Japan at Spock at the time of his alleged crabbing.

Heh.

And a lot of you populated our common rooms today! Sam devoured some clam chowder on the fourth floor, and welcomed Rilla and her 'Lite Brite' to light up the room. Jack Carter came on in and heard some spiel about Sam turning into a bear. That's a regular kind of thing here, isn't it? Tell me, how many times have you guys used that one to get out of a class?

My good friend Butters was down in the second floor common room, catching up on some Terrance and Philip. A truly high-brow work, Butters. Stan showed up so they could swap notes on their teachers. Apparently the IQ levels on this island are much higher than they're used to. I'd dispute that, excepti t wouldn't be hard to find somewhere where IQ levels are higher than at my old school. Congratulations, Fandom. Give yourself a good ol' pat on the back.

Jim had a few things to say on the topic of pirates. Oh, and here's a fun news flash: apparently Butters used to be one! I guess he doesn't need any career counselling, huh? Stan chatted with Jim about Japanese toys. He's sure they're trying to brainwash us into attacking Pearl Harbor. You heard it here first, folks-- watch out!

TOWN - WHERE THE REST OF YOU ARE.

My good friend Karla was busy at work, cleaning things up, but no one came to visit her. C'mon, guys-- you know she's got self-esteem problems. My other good friend Ariel was working too, but she's got a tougher kind of character. Hey, Ariel! Angelica manages to tough her way through her first day of employment. Nice one, Angelica. You definitely pulled out all the stops. Butter is hard at work at Fixer-Uppers, Alex Russo cleans up the magic box, and Momoko pours over cases at Cabot and Associates. Lacey has a volcano in her kitchen at Luke's. I hope that got handled. But Ariel, who's no wallflower, stops on by and cheers her up. See? It's not that rough. You just have to put in a little effort, and you'll get it right back.

At the Devil's Nest, my boss tries to figure out where we are under the watchful eyes of his boss. Jane had some blueprints left over from this weekend, and just to round everything off, joining the 'I turned into an animal, really' parade is Jenny.

Who's a cat.

Hey, we can't all be creative.

Anyway, that was all the news fit for the airwaves! Thanks again for voting me in -- you won't regret it. Have a good one!