Fandom Radio, 4/15/07

[nadiathesaint]

Hello Fandom! This is Nadia Santos broad--Bailey, put that down--casting live here at WT--no, Bailey, I don't think that squirrel wants a hug--FH once again on this lovely--Bailey, stop that right now, I mean it!--kid-filled Sunday.

If any of you have parents who have ever said "I hope some day you have a child just like you", I'm blaming you.

Bailey, please just sit quietly for a little bit? I'll let you help me read the news. . . . Thank you.

BAILEY: Mama, the squirrels are funny.

NADIA: I know, Bailey. But they're very important. They give us the news.

BAILEY: Wooooaaaaaaaaah. How?

NADIA: I have no idea. I think they're spies.

BAILEY: Can I keep this one?

NADIA: No.

How the heck did this get started, anyway?

So. It seems there was some kind of vortex in the park that all the little kids came through. That? Explains a lot. Some kids named "Qui-gon" and "Nik", whose parents might just be evil, decided upon arriving to go find . . . caf. Caffeine? Oh dios, I hope not.

BAILEY: I like caffeine.

NADIA: I'm sure you do, honey. A little girl named Walter argued with her brother Leon about the lack of swings. Another little girl named Gail sang a pirate song. Some kid named Jake stole some other kid named Aiden's wand and they argued about what the vortex was, and some other little kid named Jake wanted a milk shake.

BAILEY: I wanna milkshake, too. *sings* My milkshake brings all the kids to the yard--mmmphh!

NADIA: You can have one later, I promise, just don't sing. Kagaku wanted his papa, JD, Wraith, Paris, Toby, and Kimmy all figured out they have the same mom--good lord, I don't envy that poor girl--and go off to find her. Ursa and Kanna also have the same mom. Though . . . possibly not the same one as JD, Wraith, Paris, Toby, and Kimmy, just judging by names. Jeff wanted his laptop, which helps narrow down whose future kid he is. A whole brood named Samantha, Benjamin, Melinda, Patience, Portia, and Artemis arrived. And if they all have the same mom, then I'm feeling sorry for the poor girl's--Bailey, for the last time, the squirrels are not toys. Here, this next note is about you. Why don't you read it?

BAILEY: Okay, Mama! It says "Bailey talked to Walter and Leon about their parents." That's you and Daddy and Aunt Pippi and Mr. Pip, right?

NADIA: So it would seem. Ian and Maggie learned that they share a fake uncle who gives them junk food. Apparently? That would be Uncle Xander. This doesn't surprise me in the least.

BAILEY: I want an Uncle Xander.

NADIA: Don't we all? Karyuu likes shiny things.

BAILEY: Don't we all?

NADIA: Bayla came through on a skateboard.

BAILEY: Did not!

NADIA: Bayla, not Bailey.

BAILEY: Oh.

NADIA: Pandora decided to go looking for her mom and dad, and Debbie just wanted someone she knows. Jerry Jr. facepalmed. Possibly the most grown up kid of all. Sabrina and Akira decided to go find their mothers together. Margaret Mary wanted ice cream.

BAILEY: I want ice cream, too.

NADIA: Okay, ice cream or milkshake, not both.

BAILEY: But Mo-om. . . .

NADIA: Oh please don't start. Kagayaki wanted a hug. That, Bailey, I'll give you right now.

BAILEY: No thanks.

NADIA *sighs*: May Anarchy and Racky argued over who would be blamed for the whole thing. I have a feeling I know who their mom is. Jeff knows who they are, but they don't recognize him. Akira and Josh talked, Yukio was sad that he couldn't find his parents, and Michael tried to borrow a cell phone from May. Ben and May sort of knew each other, and May and Catie are happy to see each other. Ben tells Catie that they're siblings, even though they haven't met yet. Okay, that sounds kind of creepy.

BAILEY: Yeah. Stranger danger! Can I read some more?

NADIA: Sure.

BAILEY: Elaine, Michael, Jeff, and Parker discussed their par-paren--what's this word?

NADIA: Parentage.

BAILEY: Pardentidge. John William looked for a bakery, and Brantley and Lorelai looked for cookies. I want cookies.

NADIA: Cookies, or ice cream, or a milkshake. You have to pick.

BAILEY: You're mean.

NADIA: Damn skippy. Kid and Karyuu fought. The kid's name is Kid? Oh man, whoever did that needs some big lessons in creativity. Susannah was upset that she wasn't at the Roadhouse, whatever that is. Joanie and Thomas had a race, Jolene looked for her dad and "Uncle Sammy", so I'm guessing she's Dean's kid. Guu was not amused.

BAILEY *giggles*: Her name is Goo!

NADIA: Bailey apparently is, though. Lysander and Gail discussed what they got from their parents, Bronwyn was on a mission, Ananda shares her cookies with John William, Sophia and Ananda found out they have the same dad. And I've completely lost track of who might be who.

BAILEY: I'm Bailey. You're Mama.

NADIA: Ah. Yes. Thanks. Eddie and Lou shoved each other, and Nick decided to gather intel. Oh dios, please tell me he's not one of mine. Tributary was ready for a fight, Blue turned her wand into a rubber chicken, and Jenna looked for a mummy hand. Harmonia wanted to go home, and Mia played with her soccer ball. She's Conner's kid, isn't she. Aiden looked for a motocross track, Stewie thinks the family dog got rid of him--wait, what?--Ryan thought the vortex was weird, Ana and Tommy hid, Sebastian looked for his mom, Rowan took the portal at a run, and John wanted to establish rules, the little killjoy.

Jake told Grace that she's his aunt . . . of course, and they went looking for her house. Marcella and Graham fell through their TV, which is new, Marybeth did the whole "let's find mom and dad" thing, Andy was a good boy, and Matthew, Devon, and Marissa all knew they weren't at home, but didn't know where they were.

And every single person on this island invested in birth control, I'm sure. I hope.

And on to the dorms. Took me long enough, I know.

In the Gym this morning, Kabuto was blishfully ignorant as he worked out. Of course, then his son showed up. I'm thinking this will be a theme.

BAILEY: Mama, what does blistfully ignorant mean?

NADIA: I'll tell you later, Bailey. On the school grounds, this morning, Nova went for an unsuspecting walk and ended up staring at a little girl, who called him Papa. Does anyone not know how that feels after today? Anyone? Then, in the afternoon, Jack went for a walk, and meets Alexandria, his and Isabel's daughter. Then he gave her a piggy-back ride.

BAILEY: I want a piggy back ride!

NADIA: I already gave you one, remember? This morning on the campgrounds, Buffy cleaned up from the not-prom. Then Alec met his and Dean's son Jake. Adoption is wonderful and I fully support it. But maybe not a little kid flirting with Buffy. That's kind of goofy. But he did explain the whole "time dilation" thing. Smart kid. Alec and Buffy met their daughter Tiffany. Buffy said not to call her Mom. I'm thinking we should make t-shirts. Then Buffy met Anastasia and Tommy, who didn't know they were in Virginia. Were they Buffy's or Alec's, too?

In the fourth floor common room, Blair was coking. River stopped by, and she and Blair met their daughter, Tributary. There are no words. Then Blair met Maggie Ellision, who apparently looks a lot like Lana, and Josh Connor, who was quite rude to Blair. Aunt Nadia doesn't approve, Josh. Rikku chased Bayla in, and Blair was quite blase about the whole thing. So Rikku took care of Bayla until Jude showed up, at which point, Bayla told them "not to be gross".

BAILEY: That's good advice, Mama.

NADIA: I'll keep that in mind, Bailey. Josh and Bayla compared notes on skateboarding and getting kicked out of malls, and Yukio and Azira made friends with each other and hug. Awww. Bayla confused the he-er-heck out of Sakurazaki by calling her "Aunt" and telling her about skateboarding tricks, and Josh called a clingy Yukio a were-chicken. Akira managed to tell Sakurazaki who her mother is without actually telling her, which is a nice trick, and Kagayaki demanded hugs. Yukio and Kagayaki bonded over having wings. Yujio thought Blair's hair is cool.

BAILEY: My turn! My turn! Rikku and Jude were very surprised about having kids. Cousin Josh helped Jude make waffles. An' Kagayaki offered Jude a hug!

NADIA: Then, in the third floor common room, Tori made pancakes. Dick wanted Ryan to eat with a fork, and then told Tori he had no idea he had a kid. Aiden, who's apparently Tori's kid, showed up for the pancakes, and Sebastian told Tori his full name. Dean wondered what the heck was up with all the kids. Dick informed Dean that he was parenting, not babysitting, and then Dean met John William, and decided that Sam was going to kill him. Sabrina found Naomi, who's her mom, and wanted to know where her dad was. Broots met his daughter, Debbie, who's allergic to strawberries. Annette and Sebastian made plans for the day, and Dick and Annette agreed that this whole thing is really weird. Yes. Yes it is. Ryan compared Annette to his mom, and compared families with Sebastian. Tori met her daughter Kimberly, and they used a complex method involving spelling to figure out who Kimberly's dad is. Luke has no more clue what's going on than the rest of us, but got to meet Debbie, anyway. Tori filled Luke in on what little she knew, and Nik said she was pretty. Luke helped Wraith figure out where her mom, Z, was, and met his and Rory's son, Nik. JD and crew came to look for Z. Alec lets Dean know that they have a kid, and gets Jake some pancakes from Tori. Mac is looking for a kid. Not just any kid, though. A specific one. Good luck, Mac. We're swarming with them, right now.

In the first floor garage this morning, Sam Carter worked on her swoop bike, and then met Anakin Gilmore-Skywalker, who offered to help. Then MaryBeth Mitchell, who wanted coffee.

BAILEY: I want coffee.

NADIA: Oh hell no. Oh, and in came Jacob Carter Harkness, Sam and Jack's son, who she doesn't let play with the swoop bike. And D's kid, Charlie, who likes seahorses. Then Jake's older brother Aiden showed up, introduced Jack to his younger son, and announced that Sam built a time ship. Go Sam! And lastly, there's Louise and Eddie Kawalsky, who apparently have a bit of a paranoid streak.

Onward and upward to the fifth floor common room, where River made popcorn and tuna and marmalade cookies. Huh, I didn't know River could cook. Tributary wouldn't let her put maple syrup on the cookies, though. Why not? Tommy works out that he, or possibly Tributary, isn't a clone, or a sheep, or the Man. Good to know. Sebastian and Tributary become boyfriend and girlfriend so they can color and watch cartoons together. And somehow, despite all the various cute news we've had so far, I think that might actually be the cutest. Then Sebastian upset Tommy by telling him that he's not a ninja. Good job, Sebastian. Sofia and Ananda make River go crazy. Not hard to do, really. Ananda and Tributary get into a fistfight because they don't want to share River. Now, see, Bailey, aren't you glad you're an only child?

BAILEY: That you know of. . . .

NADIA: . . . My daughter has inherited my evil streak. Ananda discovers that Bronwyn can keep people from poking at her brains. Um, okay, good. I think. Tributary and Bronwyn discuss food and crime. I think we may need to watch out for those two. Sebastian is apparently quite the player, as he gets Bronwyn as a replacement girlfriend and tries to kiss her. Bronwyn met a ninja and explained her Aunts Willow. Yes, that's a plural on that note. No, I don't know if it's a mistake or not. Kagaku and Tributary get into a "my parents can beat up your parents" contest, at which point, Walter and Bailey, and Pippi and Walter and Leon arrived. Pippi apparently wanted to cook. Bailey explained why she was muddy. She hasn't explained yet how she manages to keep being muddy no matter how many baths she takes.

BAILEY *modestly*: It's a talent.

NADIA: Yeeeeeah. And lastly, Tommy and Little Girl Walter threw popcorn at each other.

And now for the only common room we haven't talked about so far, the one on the second floor, where Cam was hanging out with his daughter. Who tried to get a second bowl of ice cream out of him. And gets into an argument with Ben Parker about which one of them is smarter. And an insult fight with Ryan Casablancas. Cameron and Dick compare kids, and Dick wondered if he could change the future. Change it so he doesn't have kids, maybe? There are ways. . . . Ben and Beth are apprently confused about their respective sizes, and Dick was pleased to meet Ben. Cassie found out what was up with all the kids. MaryBeth picked a fight with Cassie, which, admittedly, isn't hard, and Cassie fought back, which got Cam on her case. Good job, Cassie. Marcie Blank tells Cassie about her sibling named Frito. Marty, what the hell? Frito? Please say she was making that up. Then Marcie and MaryBeth get into an argument about who's a better lockpick.

. . .

That's just frightening.

BAILEY: Why's that scary?

NADIA: It's a long story, honey, but it's about Aunt Veronica and Uncle Marty and how sometimes? They're really dumb. For the record, the answer is that Bailey is the better lockpick. So there. Angela and Cam want to know where the names came from. So do I. Cam told Stark about his theory that this is all Prom's fault. If it is, I think it's because they didn't let underclassmen in. I mean, they let us in last year, and this didn't happen. It's only logical. MaryBeth wants to know about Stark's mask, and recognizes Wyatt, who wants info. Wyatt then met . . . I dunno, someone he's related to via his granddad and Cally. And isn't that a weird thought.

And . . . still in the second floor common room, but possibly later or earlier or something, Alanna watched TV and ate popcorn. Katara came by for the hot chocolate and stayed for the two daughters randomly showing up. And the talking about prom, apparently. Ana showed up, looking for her younger brother. Alanna thought she seemed young for a highschooler. Then Alanna fulfilled her prom queen duties by offering death threats to Greg for calling her Prom Queen. Er. Alanna? I just want you to know I'm not calling you that, I'm only reading the notes. Okay? Josh ambushed Greg with the whole "Daddy" thing. Greg tried to protect his hair. Or something. Molly's weirded out by having a kid with Anakin, which makes Alanna laugh, and Sokka thinks that Trudi, Molly's daughter, was picking a fight with his niece. Katara flailed in Molly's general direction. Dick showed up with Ryan, causing Alanna to nearly fall off the couch. But revenge is sweet, because then in came Thomas and Joanie to call her "grandma'.

Wow, I'm really, really glad that didn't happen to me.

Back up to the fifth floor common room we go, where Annette watches Sebastian play Wii. Aiden tells Annette that he thinks Tori is a good mommy. Or possibly that Annette's a good mommy. It's kind of hard to tell. Annette and Tori psychologically age about 10 years and discuss motherhood. Tommy woke up and thought he was lost. Cally has apparently lost her daughter. Oh geez, that sucks. Annette hasn't seen her, though.

And this just in about the fourth floor common room, Tributary wants to know if Blair has a thing for girls who can beat him up. The answer is yes, Tributary. Trust me on that. Billy is a sneaky, silent ninja type, and a little blonde girl jumps Blair and calls him Daddy.

Oh, and hey, look, Bailey. Here's the notes about me trying to give you a bath.

BAILEY *carefully pronounced adult voice*: It was a futile gesture.

NADIA: Yes. And your daddy and I know that, now. In other dorm-related news: Parker called Weiss early this morning. Jack and Cedric were woken up by Aiden. How's that for a wake-up call? Thank you, by the way, for not doing that to me and Walter, Bailey.

BAILEY: Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

NADIA: Bel, Phoebe, and Anders all woke up together and--I'm not reading that, there's a child present. And children all over the island.

BAILEY: What? I wanna know!

NADIA: I'll tell you when you're older.

BAILEY: I'm already seven and a half,

NADIA: Sorry, you need to be thirty before I'll have this conversation with you. Not that it really matters, since a group of kids all shimmered in, anyway, and interrupted the, er, festivities. There was much WTFing and flailing.

BAILEY: I know what that means, you know,

NADIA: Oh, really.

BAILEY: Yup. It means Wallace the Frog. Daddy told me.

NADIA *lost in giggles*

BAILEY *in a very important adult like voice*: After distracting the kiddies with food--Mama, I'm hungry--Bel and Phoebe and Anders continued to Wallace the Frog at each other.

NADIA *still giggling*

BAILEY: Then Jude and Rikku were woken up by Bayla, who's not me, and who wanted waffles. I want waffles, too. Mama, I'm hungry. Dick was woken up by his son Ryan, and Marie and Jamie were woken up by Daniel, who was Jamie's son with Layla, and Andy, who was Marie's son with Bridge. If they had kids with other mamas and daddies, why are they wakin' up together? Did they have a sleepover?

NADIA *is recovered*: Yes. A nice sleepover. Annette met her son, Sebastian Jr. Jim and Lana snuggled . . . and the notes don't seem to know if they got woken up by a kid, but I'm thinking the odds are good that they were. Cam saw Veronica off, then met their daughter, MaryBeth. Marty and Angela woke up to their kids, Marcie and Graham . . . and I'm so telling Marcella about this, Marty, and Mac and Cally are woken up by Cally's daughter. Who's possibly a Halliwell? It amazes me how many of us apparently know each other in the biblical sense in the future. Teddy and Chad are woken up by their son Orden. Chad, Teddy, I'm ashamed of you. That had better be a family name somewhere. Rikku flailed at Hermione about the kids. As you do. Peter Parker and Zero woke up. I'm sure there was a small child involved. Chris met his and Summer's son, Matthew. Parker encountered her daughter Catie. Who is probably the best dressed little girl on the island.

BAILEY: Other than me.

NADIA: Not if you keep playing in mud puddles. Parker's son Ben demanded chocolate. And no, Bailey, you can't have any chocolate.

BAILEY: Aw maaaaan,

NADIA: Summer and Shawn met their son, Devon.

BAILEY: Mama, this soda tastes funny.

NADIA: What soda--oh, Bailey, don't drink that. That's not soda, it's rum.

BAILEY: Ewwwwwwwwwwwww.

NADIA: Right then! Moving on. Apparently there was a little girl screaming in the Preserve. Someone please tell me someone found her and helped her out? Isabel got a visit from Samantha, who is Bel and Phoebe's daughter, and Jack brought Alexandria by, too. Bridge and Xander's daughter Brownwyn showed up. Bridge and Xander have a kid, too? Awww! Isabel's son Josh came in search of his dad, Greg. Elsewhere, Blair met Broots and Parker's son, Jeff, and River was exhausted by Tributary. I swear, some of these names. . . . Z met her many kids, apparently each by another member of her team back home. Er. Way to go? Dawn languished in happy ignorance in her room until Sam showed up with Maggie, his and Dawn's kid, and Joy, Buffy's kid. So then Dean came by with Jake and John William, who is apparently his and Dawn's kid. Dawn should have found a better happily ignorant hiding spot. John Crichton got stuck with babysitting duties, and D'Argo and Umberta, who are, I'm assuming, his kids, got into a fight. Luke brought his and Rory's son Nik to visit, and Rory showed up with her and Logan H's kids. *snickers* Here, Bailey, you read this one.

BAILEY: Okay! Nik demanded caf from his mom and Rory was all Wallace the Frog at Luke.

NADIA *giggles*: Very nice, honey. Aeryn returned and Rory's son guessed she was the maid. I'm hoping that Rory's son can run very, very quickly. D'Argo and Umberta greeted her with tales of missing her and with sass, respectively, and then Aeryn got to meet Rory's mini-army. Aeryn demanded that John discipline his sassy daughter, but John was afraid of becoming yet another small animal.

Rory was making her way to the Perk when she met her kids with Logan Huntzberger. Do I know him? Well, that certainly explains the "Logan H" thing, at least. Billy and Ami came back to the island. I bet whatever kids they will inevitably have were quite pleased to see this. There was, naturally, a small child in John Connor's room. Was it the one he had with the nun? That kid was pretty cool. Naomi called her baby-daddy. Chris and his daughter Peri found Peri's mom Luna in her room, and Ami checked her email. Apparently without suddenly discovering she was a mom. Lucky Ami.

Greg did his son Josh's hair, then he introduced the kid to Lucas. Isabel showed up, looking for her son. Parker puts her mini-corporation of kids to work pranking Blair. Summer finds out she has yet another kid. D'Anna finds out that she has kids. John and Aeryn put their kids to bed. Marie brings Andy to meet Bridge. Who, if I'm not mistaken, and I really probably could be, because keeping track of these family trees would require a level of drunkeness I'm not comfortable with in front of a seven year old--

BAILEY: I'm seven and a half!

NADIA: --is Andy's dad. Jack tucks his oldest into bed in his room. Z attempts to get her kids to go to sleep. Anders, Bel, Phoebe, and way too many kids tried to get comfortable in one bed. Dick is totally convinced, by the time he and Ryan go to bed, that Ryan is, in fact, his kid. Tori awwwed over her kid as they got ready for bed for the night, Jude was all flaily and in wonder over having a kid before Rikku and Bayla showed up for the night, and Annette sang Sebastian to sleep, but was visited by Josh Connor, who apparently isn't tired yet, somehow. Pippi went the bed time story route with her kids, and was joined by Pip and teenaged!Walter, and let me tell you, I never thought I'd have to specify that.

BAILEY: Mama, I want a bed time story.

NADIA: This is your bed time story, Bailey. Go to sleep now.

BAILEY: Nope. No bed.

NADIA: Drat. D'Anna got her kids all tucked into various beds, and Marty gets told a bed time story by his kids, which my notes assure me was "totally frakking adorable".

BAILEY: Mama, what does frakking mean?

NADIA: Er. Moving on!

The town that time keeps forgetting, and then remembering and sending far too much love its way all at once

BAILEY: Mama, I want to invite all the squirrels to my party, okay?

NADIA: Don't worry, honey, if we have it in Fandom, they'll all show up, anyway. . . .

Yondaime woke up alone, but lord knows that didn't last long, as Deadpool showed up with two kids, one of which claimed to be Yondaime's. The two new parents stocked up on coffee. Mr. Winchester and Principal Washburn were woken up by, you guessed it, their daughter, Grace. Mr. Winchester thought it was some kind of hallucination. I would have thought he'd been here for longer than that. Principal Washburn just kind of hated the island. Here, here. John and Rosette woke up together with--OH FOR--She's a nun, John! Or at least pretending to be a nun!

BAILEY: Nun's get sleepy sometimes too, you know, Mama,

NADIA *sound of repeated headdesking*

BAILEY: Mama's tired, so I'm going to read more notes! Chrono didn't like what John and Rosette were doing, but Rosette said to "get over it". And Xander was in town and bumped into Nick who said that his mom could kick Xander's ass. I bet my mama could kick Xander's ass, too. And Nick asked Xander 'bout Parker. Heeeee. Ass and ask almost sound the same. Aunt Pippi saw all the kids in the park and met Leon, who I guess is my cousin. And Cafe Fina was open. My daddy used to work there. An' Mama worked there once, too, but she Doesn't Like To Talk About It. Sokka met his neice and nephew Kanna and Ursa, and then freaked out 'cause Ursa's daddy is Zuko. An' then Aunt Pippi and Leon came by to meet Sokka, and that made Sokka flail. Aly's brain got broken when Josh introduced her to her kids, Thomas and Joanie. She's gonna need a cast. Mama, do they make brain casts?

NADIA: If they do, we all need one. Can I have the notes back?

BAILEY: But I'm having fu-un!

NADIA: Bailey . . . Thank you. Anakin boggled when he found out that he has a dauther with Molly named Trudi.

BAILEY: I like that game.

NADIA: What game?

BAILEY: Boggle.

NADIA: Riiiiight. Anakin also met Anakin met Lysander as well, who is apparently Callisto's son. Then Trudi and Ursa showed off their abilities.

Jaye met her son, Qui-Gon, who she apparently had with some guy named Obi-Wan. Then she proved that she's pretty smart when she decided that Qui-Gon was a terrible name and started calling him OJ instead. Then Jaye met her daughter, who thought she was having a 'sode. So then another kid came by to ask for help finding her parents. . . . Jaye is popular with the kids. Poor Jaye.

The Blood Gulch Arms was open today. And we find out that Tex and Deadpool were the ones to name their kid Kid. This apparently broke Tex's brain rather a bit, too. So of course, Deadpool had to come by with his other kid, named Karyuu. Graham came by and tried to buy a gun, but Kid showed remarkable maturity when he said that he couldn't. Pippi and Leon passed by, so of course Leon wanted some guns, too, and Kid made faces at him. Josh wanted a gun. But he couldn't pay for it, so Tex wouldn't give him one.

And doesn't that give you so much confidence in the abilities of our great sherrif.

John and Aeryn hit up the God of Biscuits, which is where they meet D'Argo and Umberta, the latter being John's daughter with former professor Rita Skeeter. No wonder he feared for his humanity. Peter Griffin came in with his son, Stewie. Which means someone slept with Peter Griffin. Ew.

BAILEY: Why is that gross?

NADIA: I'll tell you when you're thirty. Susie and Alex showed up, as well, and so did Gail, who wanted to buy out the store, or something. Sam W showed up and learned that Susie and Alex are the spawn of Willow and English Peter when they ask him to help them find their parents. That's also where Sam met Maggie, his daughter with Dawn.

You keeping track of all of this? Someone should make a spreadsheet. Willow, I'd be looking at you if you were anywhere in my sight range.

Oh, and Sam also met Joy, who is his daughter with Buffy. He got both Summers sisters knocked up? Wow. Just wow. Jake met his son Michael, whose mother is apparently. Parker, in the mean time, met her son Ben at the park, and apparently Ben's not telling who his daddy is.

Pippi took Leon to the junkyard.

BAILEY: Ooo! Ooo! I wanna read these.

NADIA: Go for it, kiddo.

BAILEY: Then Mr. Teddy showed up with his son Yukio who's really little and who's mama is Setsuna. An' Ana wanted to know if Aunt Pippi knew any men with eyepatches, but she didn't mean Mr. Pip, which is good, because Mr. Pip is Aunt Pippi's. Then Mama and I showed up and Aunt Pippi thought it was funny that I was messy, but I totally wasn't and I didn't need a bath! An' Yuko wanted Mama to pick him up and then Mama talked to Teddy, and then we found Daddy! And Daddy and Aunt Pippi wanted to know where babies come from. I already know that, though.

NADIA: Oh yeah?

BAILEY: Uh-huh. Uncle Cesar told me in Buenos Aires.

NADIA *cheerfully*: I'll kill him. My turn, Bailey. Pip showed up with his and Pippi's daughter, Walter, and Guu was there, too, looking for something to eat. Ah, here, read this one, Bailey.

BAILEY: Mama went for a walk on the beach, an' that's where I found her. An' then a boy showed up an' called Mama "Aunt Nadia" and said his name was Josh Conner and his mama was named Rosette. And OrangeShoeSevenAide was open, and that's a silly name. A boy came by and groaned at people named Jerry and Emily looked for candy and Parker took two of her kids to Chilly Boulder for ice cream! Mama, I want--

NADIA: No ice cream. It's past your bedtime.

BAILEY: You're the worst mama, ever. John was an awesome daddy, though, 'cause he showed up with D'Argo and Umberta, who were fighting, and Parker and John Wallace the Frogged at each other. Jake showed up to bring Parker another kid, and he got all freaked out by Ben 'cause he knows him and Broots and his daughter came in and Debbie loves her Aunt Parker, and Jerry Jr. asked Broots to adopt him, and Jarod came by and Catie was happy, 'cause he's her daddy, and Pandora and Artemis told Parker about their parents and Jerry Jr. asked Parker to adopt him and *gasp* and *gasp, gasp* and . . . .

NADIA: And it's my turn again. Dick told his son never to do anything that he or Logan did, and Jeff came in to cause more brain breakage and plot to fill Broots' and Blair's room with popcorn. No, Bailey, you can't have any popcorn, either. Yes, I know, I mean. Parker met her and Jack's daughter, Sophia--

BAILEY: That's my name!

NADIA: No it's not, it's spelled differently. Sophia apparently took the whole situation in stride. And then Parker met Parker, apparently the son of Seely. The twins opened Sparky Repairs, which remained kid free. Ellen thought she was going to get a quiet moment in the park, the fool. Her daughter Susannah showed up, instead. And Annette came by, too, to tell Ellen about Sebastian showing up. A'rine was delighted to see her Aunt Annette, and Mac came by looking for Cally's daughter and finds out about Annette and Dick's son, instead. Chris TMIs--hey, Bailey, what do you think TMI means?

BAILEY: Tim Makes Inkblots.

NADIA *giggles*: Sure, why not. Well, Chris did that at Ellen about his kid and not having a . . . romantic entanglement. So, of course, he then met his dauther. Looks like Ellen has a son, too. Who's dad is Sam. Jerry Jr. is apparently desperate, and tries to convince Ellen that he's her kid, too. Alas, no, he just has insane parents. Actually literally insane, not just Fandom-weird. Mac checks in with Ellen about whether or not she's seen a girl in need of Prozac. I'm assuming that's Cally's daughter? Wilson and Ellen see the brighter side of this whole insane thing and enjoy the sounds of children playing. And then Ellen found out she had a granddaughter.

Poor Ellen.

Rikku and Bayla went to town for supplies, and Bayla worried Rikku with her skateboarding tricks. Tori took her kids to the beach, where they tackled Conner. Well, whichever of Tori's kids were also Conner's kids tackled him. I'm so confused. . . .

Xander waited to meet up with Bridge in the park. But first, Cally came through, still looking for her kid. But rest assured, Bridge totally didn't stand Xander up. Willow somehow made it all the way to dinner at Pizza Planet without getting a kid or two attached to her. But, of course, that was not meant to last, as Ian, her and Giles' son, showed up. As did, wow, that's quite a name, Mary Michal Judith Anges Rosenburg Booth. Who is Willow and Seely's kid.

*sound of someone falling off a chair laughing*

BAILEY: Mama, what's so funny?

NADIA *through giggles*: Seely . . . and Willow . . . *happy sigh* I'm okay. It's a long story, Bailey.

Shuichi opened the Devil's Nest, as usual. Lucifer was there, as well, and in came Kabuto with a kidlet, and, well. I'm sure you can all guess by now what happened next. Doogie somehow managed to have nothing at all happen during his shift at the clinic. Stark had clinic duty this evening, and met Perfectly Normal, the emo-est little girl in the world. I would be emo, too, with a name like that. GOB apparently thought he was in for a quiet night at Caritas. Poor fool. Constable Frasier came to enjoy the quiet, too, but then . . . wait for it . . . their daughter showed up. GOB's and Constable Frasier's. That . . . might have been the last straw for my brain. I'll miss you, brain. . . .

BAILEY: Mama, you're silly.

NADIA: No, I've just been in Fandom for too long. Is that it? I think that's it.

BAILEY: I'm tired.

NADIA: Honey, you don't know the half of it. Good night Fandom and Fandom kids. Here's hoping we manage to get you all to your proper homes, soon. Before we all go completely insane.

[ooc: For the record? There were more than 90 posts in this game, today. I'm impressed. *falls over*]