[identity profile] drywitmartini.livejournal.com
Good evening, Fandom! It is I, the one, the only, your school's Vice Principal and Principle of Vices. Yes, ladies and germs, it's Hawkeye Pierce aka DJ Hawk here with you today on the pirate's own Fandom Radio. Prepare to be dazzled by the wild and wacky adventures of your fellow Fandomoniums.

School Room Blues

First up, as part of the Fandom High administration's full service torture package, not only do you have to live through classes, but now you have to listen to me talk about them all over again. Don't worry kids and kids-at-heart, I won't be offended if you block your ears and say 'lalalala' for this next part.

Zero taught Creature Languages by showing a shark video. I'm assuming that's because they were learning how to speak shark, and if you've been here long enough, I doubt that's surprising to you.

Advanced Criminal Justice, with the big guy in blue, talked about Criminal Justice. Namely, the guys in robes and the places they hang out when they're not at the bar drinking.

Speaking of which, in the spirit of Ms Tyler's drinking game, I recommend all of you over the legal drinking age indulge a little during this broadcast. It's the only thing that'll get you through it. Those of you who aren't over the legal drinking age are free to do whatever you want as long as I don't find out about it.

Music 201 with Professor Ted studied the music of Middle Earth, as opposed to Left Earth or Right Earth. They also ate food. Any class with food can't be all bad.

Biology, Chemistry and Forensics got their grades, and it's a fare thee well to Sara Sidle. Professor Sidle, it's been a pleasure, but sadly not 'a pleasure' since we never met. Perhaps in another life. Parting is such sweet sorrow. Et cetera.

Speech 201 worked on speeches about what they learned in Fandom. I think that's pretty straight forward. Death means nothing except, I'm told, something involving jazz hands, ducks have teeth, the Dean is a head in a tube and be careful what you eat, because it might turn you into a bunny. More on that later, folks. Speech 301 played poker.

...and I wasn't invited??? What is wrong with you people? That's it, I'm making an administrative decree. No gambling on campus without at least inviting me first. Moving along...

The ever-lovely Miss Bristow took over for Professor Dream in Classics and Foreign Literature by assigning readings. Okay, so maybe she isn't ever-lovely, just whenever she's not giving out readings.

Arthurian Traditions with a man who's secure enough in his masculinity to wear a skirt learned about something to do with Arthur. I'm sure if you cared, you'd be doing the class and would already know what they learned about.

Political Campaigning with Professor Lemon.. *rustling notes* wait, no, Professor LYMAN I'm sorry, talked about free media *snort* and Angel's fashion sense. That's what it says right here, folks.

Sociology of Sex Cultures, a class I'm most intrigued by and must sit in on some time, talked about prostitution. Professor Grissom, you've sold me. I'll be there next week.

Business classes with the delectable, and very taken I know - hello Mr Danes and what a fine lady your wife is - Professor Gilmore-Danes, worked on final projects.

Histories of Western Civilization and Medieval England with Professor Talk, Dark and Brooding learned about medieval things, including the Black Death, not to be confused by the White Death, Beige Death or Periwinkle Polka-Dotted Death.

Ms Calendar - call me - taught today as well. Amazing things teachers do on a daily basis. Psychology 101 talked about perception, which is all in the eye of the beholder, things aren't as they seem and how about a date Saturday night, Ms Calendar? While the Jung students did something to do with Jung. As you do.

Finally, General Physical Conditioning did the same thing they do every week. They were generally physical. Or physically general. Either way, I'll bet with all of that conditioning their hair looks shiny and new.

And now we move on to office hours. The booming voice accompanying the head in the tube and lady with legs all the way to the floor, Professor Cregg held office hours but no one showed. Offer hors d'oeuvres or free chilli next time and the kids will be lining up for hours to see you. The stickbug-wielding Professor Ms Rita Skeeter Esquire the Third Pty Ltd held office hours and got some visitors. I'll bet she offered chilli.

Nobody visited the teachers' lounge today, probably because Biff went on a binge and drank all of the alcohol last night. I'm joking, of course. Know that the Fandom High faculty are in no way heavy drinkers. At all.

The cafeteria, on the other hand, was booming with business. Nadia and Victor had lunch. My notes say there was no drama or emo. Kids, it's high school. I don't know what emo is, but high school *is* drama. Enjoy it while it lasts, or at least act up once in a while. It makes my life more interesting. Quinn was traumatized by the Chef wearing...leather pants. Quinn, we have a school counselor. After a sight like that, use the free counseling. You'll need it.

Now onward to that house of constant learning, knowledge and highly caffeinated assistants, the library. Sam and Zero talked about Creature Languages, Parker and Zero had an apparently noteworthy lunch - noteworthy enough to get on the radio anyway - and Rory helped Peter do some research. If it's anything like the research I did in the stacks in high school... study hard, kids.

She-of-the-Ever-Changing-Hair sent an email about a Creature Languages mix-up and He-of-the-Everlasting-Sugar-High sent an email about Music 201.

And finally, according to today's announcement, the red crayon of doom was gone, but various lockers were giving out free cream pies if you were fast enough to catch them.

A Wretched Hive of Gum and Villainy

You kids and your cahooting and carousing. Ah, youth. Just don't set anything on fire and we'll get along fine.

The gym was busy today with Cam, Aeryn and Isabel stopping by.

Krycek couldn't resist the urge to dance, and now I'm telling everyone what a dancing queen he is on the radio. I'm sure he'll take requests if you ask nicely.

It seems that the dorms were visited by a ghost today. I've given up on being surprised by this place. The ghost, whom I will now name Joey Joe Joe, had a pillow fight with Ms Sun and tried to make people dance. Some ghosts want Earthly revenge. Others just want a good tune to swing to.

Posters for something called girlkissy went up, and now I'm wondering if I need to set up a teacher version to set a good example. It seems Ms Thrace isn't too pleased about it. Where's your school spirit? Posters for RISK on Saturday night were also around the dorms.

And...this can't be right. My notes say that Sharon decided to nuke some Peeps. Peeps? People? Anyone with radiation poisoning, please report to the clinic and for the love of...

*whispering off microphone*

Ah. Apparently Sharon ISN'T getting detention for setting off a nuclear device, she just decided to cook some candy in the microwave.

Pippi watched Bitterwoman in the 5th floor common room - we have a 5th floor?

To start us off with the meetings and greetings of the day, John and Aeryn are in the running for the Couple Most Likely to Send Everyone to the Dentist With Cavaties award. Ivanova is sad about Tonks leaving, but fear not Ivanova. There are other fish in the sea, birds in the sky and singles in the bars and there always will be.

Anakin aka that Broody Kid with the Robes visited Isabel, Alphonse was visited by Victor and Cameron slept in his own bed. My notes say 'for once'. Cameron, you ol' dog.

Downtown Fandom: Check Your Sanity at the Gate

*takes a deep breath*

We're on the final stretch here, folks. Hold onto your hats, keep your hands and arms inside the vehicle and hold your breath and count backwards from 30.

If you're looking for a job, Crowley of The Arms Hotel is hiring.

Camulus and Orlin are back to their old selves. This is apparently a good thing. Then they had dinner. And I thought the Crabapple Cove Courier was easy-going with what they considered news, but this is ridiculous.

The Great Vodka Supplier and her Boy Wonder visited Galactica Point. Nice name for a place. Very sci-fi. Ivanova also stopped by at the Point for a brooding session.

Weevil and Veronica were at Caritas chatting away about life, love and...well actually, I don't know what they were talking about. Ask them if you're interested. Victor was there too, but he had no one to talk to.

Meanwhile, Sparky Repairs was busy, as was the grand high poobah of baked goods, the Kwik Stop and the Fourth Sin where GOB and Becky were romantic. In the brothel. How sweet.

Lastly, you were all fantastically healthy individuals and the empty clinics were proof of that.

So folks...

Wait, no, there's one last thing.

*silence, then a burst of laughter*

It seems the good Mr Echolls, labelled here as "Logan-who-used-t'be-a-bunny" is now "Logan-who-used-to-be-a-bunny-and-is-now-one-again." Ladies and gentlemen, enjoy this opportunity. There will be "Logan-who-used-to-be-a-bunny-and-is-now-one-again" merchandise and memorabilia available from my office as of tomorrow. Don't forget to get your photo taken with "Logan-who-used-to-be-a-bunny-and-is-now-one-again" and scratch the little guy behind the ears.

I'll bet he loves baby talk too.

This is DJ Hawk, broadcasting to you from Crow's Nest II. Enjoy your completely non-alcoholic beverages, your completely innocent and non-mischievous gatherings and have a good night!
[identity profile] likeguidelines.livejournal.com
This be [livejournal.com profile] likeguidelines bringin' ye the latest in news from Fandom High.

Readin', Writin', 'Rithamatic
Thar be a class trip to the Plottin' Zoo. Like everything else here, it be not quite normal.

Angela be meetin' up with the Plot Marmoset 'n findin' everythin' t'be worthy o' questions, Rory be touchin' the Purple Prose Puppy 'n expressin' herself rather ornately, and Marty be gettin' nipped by the Plotypus 'n thinkin' he be in John Cusack movies.

Alanna be touchin' the Drunken Monkey 'n thinkin' she be drunk. And fallin' inter the Plot Dolphin tank. Fortunately thar be a superhero on the trip--Professor Tick be helpin' her out. Hamlet be licked by the Plot Gnu 'n be stuck spoutin' Shakespearean sonnets. Jack Harkness be gettin' spit on by the Plot Camel 'n thinkin' he be Jeannie from "I Dream of Jeannie." And he be thinkin' Hamlet be his Master. And then a plot bunny be makin' them both think that they be ninjas.

Kawalsky be touchin' the Plot Snake 'n thinkin' he be Samuel L. Jackson. Then a plot bunny be touchin' Rory. The Godzilla!Rory v. Mace Windu!Kawalsky be not t'be missed. Professor Tick's be fallin' into the Punguin Tank and be gettin' punny. More punny?

Han be touched by a plot bunny 'n thinkin' he be shrinkin' fer a while before bein' nipped by the Emo Emu. Professor Cregg by spit on by the Drama Llama 'n be discoverin' that everything be so dramatic. She also be runnin' inter an old friend. Or at least be thinkin' she be runnin' inter an old friend. Silly plot bunnies. She 'n Zero be affected by a plot bunny that be makin' them reveal all of their inner dialogue. Then at the plot amoeba display, Zero be discoverin' that everythin' be an epiphany.

Elizabeth be touchin' the Plot Armadillo 'n takin' offense at everythin'. She 'n Professor Tick be thinkin' they be married fer a while, too, thanks to a plot bunny. And Lisa be gettin' drenched by the Plot Elephant 'n be losin' her short-term memory.

In non-zoo news, Professor Seimei be holdin' office hours, Special Collections be openin' up again on Monday, Professor Dream be changin' his class schedule a bit, and the Journalism project from Duce 'n Delerium, Jes' say yes t' body art! be gettin' kicked off today.

In the clinic, Maia's still sufferin' from her emo-coma thing. She be gettin' some visitors, though. Duce, Paige, Sawyer, and O'Neill also be stoppin' into the clinic with various ailments that we be too polite t'broadcast here.

Jonathan be available fer counselin' sessions today, too.

Parker be runnin' fer Academic Affairs Chair, the elections for which be held tomorrow.

Aeryn be takin' care of Professor Tick's Cube o' Wonder in the common room. She be discussin' the Cube 'n what be makin' it so wonderous wit' Sharon, and then be askin' Crichton t'explain the Cube. He be refusin', then he 'n a whole lot o' people be makin' up vile tales of what the Cube o' Wonder could be used fer. Anders be joinin' Aeryn in the confusion o'er the Cube. Professor Tick finally be returnin' from the field trip to reclaim it. He be not havin' much luck wit' it, either.

Jonathan be cleanin' his room, then be talkin' in the common room about that thing that he 'n Draco might have done that meant absolutely nothin'. Because look! Lily!

Crichton be playin' music entirely too early in the morning. Cam 'n Vala be not that appreciative. I be gettin' an attack o' sugar shock with all the happy people who not be woken up by loud music today. The happy smilin' be includin', but in no way limited to Kara, Parker, and Callynanders, which be a new word as far as I be concerned.

Mr. Flinkman's outside! I thought he be a figment of me imagination fer a while, meself. But he be talkin' with Veronica, so he must be real.

Shep be out of the clinic. Welcome back, Shep! And Angela 'n Marty are bein' less awkward around each other, Aeryn 'n Lee be in the gym together, Kara 'n Anders be practicin' fer their big tryout that be comin' up, Parker 'n Callisto be havin' a chat about the Ethics class project, and Professor Maclay be givin' all her neighbors on the first floor candy.

And now we be pausin' fer a commercial from the Aficionado Arms )

New sacred duty fer CRACK: feed the ducks. Speakin' of feedin' the ducks, Crowley be doin' so and makin' a new friend in Angelus. It be nice t'see Angelus make friends. He always has such interestin' ones.

Becky 'n Chaucer be meetin' in the park, and Professor Cregg be runnin' into Professor Methos on her way back from church.

Frank 'n Bagaos be talkin' business at the Aficionado Arms and frogs be hitchin' some rides home from Mass this mornin'.

Logan-who-be-not-a-bunny 'n Allie be bein' cute at home and at movies.

Add Paige t'the list o' people at this school who be possessed in the last few weeks. Lily 'n Michael be helpin' her, Aziraphale be exorcisin' her--anyone else be knowin' he could do that? I didn't know he could do that--then Michael, Lily 'n Sawyer be takin' her back to the Emporium and assurin' her that Chaucer be totally buyin' the "I turned evil and didn't mean to be a huge bitch t'ye" argument. I personally wouldn't be puttin' any money on that meself.

Anyone who be stoppin' into Aziraphale's shop be meetin' up with his friend Crowley, who be not quite as nice. Sorry 'bout that, Shane. Aziraphale be a little worn out from the whole exorcism thing, anyway.

After a really early phone call, Rory 'n Logan-who-still-be-a-bunny be chattin' with Krycek 'n Jake at the Echolls House.

Sam, O'Neill 'n Janet be havin' coffee at the Perk before runnin' into Jonas Quinn, a newcomer in town who be lookin' pretty familiar t' them. Rory be thar, too, conductin' peer mediator interviews, but it's mostly about the vampire puppy and Logan-who-still-be-a-bunny. She be catchin' up with her mom 'n Lane, and Parker be stoppin' by t'show off her new frog.

At Deb's, George 'n Jayne be talkin' about the fear toxin at Spike's, and a bunch of folks be stoppin' in and chattin' about their experiences at the plottin' zoo. Wilson be stoppin' by Spike's tonight, too.

That be all from the Crow's Nest. Keep an eye out fer the Rover, and have a good night!
[identity profile] likeguidelines.livejournal.com
This be [livejournal.com profile] likeguidelines, bringin' ye the latest 'n greatest on this happy Friday at Fandom High. Unless ye be in Ethics class o' course. Then today be filled with gnashin' o' teeth 'n rendin' o' garments.

Readin', Writin', Rithamatic
Martial Arts be beatin' on their partners fer credit and Gardenin' Class be meetin' fer the first time and plantin' different kinds of amaryllis.

Physical Geography be learnin' about geomorphology, which I didn't even know be a word, School band be workin' in groups fer their big end-of semester concert, and Math classes be learnin' about numbers. Go figger. Ha! I crack meself up.

A reminder to ye all: the write-in election fer Academic Affairs will be held on Monday. I be hearin' from Wednesday Addams that she be no longer interested in the position, too.

Students in Ethics class be busy today, first by debatin' whether murder be never acceptable, regardless o' circumstances.

And then with their out-o'-class assignment. If ye've been livin' under a rock today, ye wouldn't know that the Ethics Class has also been divided up into pairs to learn about master/slave relationships. The rest o' ye may have heard by the screechin' and carryin' on throughout the day, this be not goin' over well in some quarters. Professor Maclay be in her office if ye be havin' any questions, though. Logan be layin' out some ground rules for his new "slave" Parker already. Too bad he be a bunny. *snickers* More on that later.

Professor Methos be apologizin' to Angelus about bein' banned from the Special Collections, and Cally 'n Angelus be makin' friends in the library. Yes, ye be hearin' that right.

Xander 'n a very familiar 'n handsome pirate be recordin' the Chef fer thar music class assignment, and Coach Ash be holdin' a fundraiser. Ye can pay him five dollars and then go after his evil twin with a baseball bat. And they say we don't have sports teams on campus.

Students in Diplomacy be discussin' what happens when yer outfit offends an entire race, and the students in Languages and Speech be watchin' movies.

Journalism class be interviewin' Fandom High staff, and be reminded that their big group projects be due at midnight tonight.

The list fer detention this week be rather long 'n distinguished. Professor Cregg'll be lookin' forward t'seein' yer shiny faces early tomorrow mornin'.

Dean Bristow 'n Scooter be holdin' office hours, and Chloe be gettin' some bloodwork done in the clinic.

In Study Hall, Parker 'n Paige be goin' over their debate notes, Angela 'n Duce be talkin' about dreams, Angela 'n Marty are bein' civil to each other, Rory be interviewin' Bridge about bein' a peer moderator, and Jonathan 'n Angelus be havin' a totally innocent conversation about nothin' at all.

Cam 'n the Gang be on their mornin' run. Crazy bastards, the lot o' em. They also be interviewin' Crichton fer a music homework assignment.

Harry Potter be takin' up smokin', Anya 'n O'Neill be havin' one heck of an argument, and Marty be on the case to find out who set off the weird gas in Spike's Pub that be makin' everyone go insane.

Anakin be bringin' Professor Amidala coffee. How sweet. Coach Ash, o' course, be mockin' him for moonin' around in the hallways like an idiot.

Crichton be havin' cookies in his outside the dorms. Mm. Cookies. And then Vala 'n Cam decide to make out fer the entire school t'watch. Thanks fer that.

Professor Tick be needin' some help with his Cube o' Wonder.

At the Perk, Professor Maclay 'n Beka be talkin' about life in Beka's home dimension, and Veronica be givin' Marty advice.

Blood Gulch Arms be openin', 'n Red be orientin' Tex t'life in our fair town. Yes, thar were zombies here a few weeks ago. Hard t'believe that be not in the Chamber o' Commerce report, really.

Thar be more Post-It wars at the Echoll's house, and Han, Bagoas 'n Frank be spendin' a quiet night in the Falcon.

Paige be tryin' t'get really friendly with Crowley, a new townie, before havin' a run-in with Beck, who be not pleased that Paige's recent escapades have been cuttin' into her profits. Later on in the park, Crowley 'n Aziraphale be discussin' Paige and Kadaj be sizin' the two of them up.

Thar be a town meetin' on October 27th, and the Halloween Party at Wednesday's home be on October 30th, so be markin' yer calendars 'n workin' on yer outfits. I will be goin' as not-a-pirate. Ye'll never recognize me.

George be gettin' a tattoo at Red's.

At Spike's, George be askin' the proprietor about the night the creepy gas be released, and Elizabeth, Janet 'n Sam be relaxin' thar after a difficult day.

Kiki be stoppin' into Wonka's and Lana be buyin' a book at Aziraphale's shop fer her naval friend. I be tellin' ye right now that book be not fer me.

At Deb's, Professor Cregg 'n the Doctor be havin' a relationship discussion and Aeryn 'n Tex be bondin' over munitions,

Curse of the Were-Rabbit be playin' at the theater. Cally 'n Anders be thar, bein' all ridiculously cute, 'n then be movin' their cuteness over to Deb's.

It be Rory's birthday party today, in case ye've been missin' all the emails about it. Sorry I couldn't be makin' it, Rory. It seems like it were quite the event. Professor Gilmore-Danes be talkin' to Professor Tick about her daughter's sidekick status before Professor Tick be traumatizin' Luke. Geoff 'n Marty be commisseratin' about the mess their lovelives be in, and Anakin be not likin' glitter. Sissy. Parker 'n Crichton be talkin' about costumes, and Rory be talkin' with her mother and her boyfriend, who be *shouts of laughter* turned into a bunny.

*sounds of door opening*

Jake, Logan be a bunny! Really!

Even the clinic can't help him.

Sorry. I be back. Hee. Bunny. Rory be sharin' animal transformation tales (hah! I be so punny tonight) with Draco, who be seemin' a little strange around her. And Logan be turnin' into a bunny because he 'n Rory were *snickers* workin' on needlepoint. In the storage room. She be makin' out like a pirate in gifts, though, which be includin' a vampire puppy and a pretty neat Jedi party trick.

Finally, Chiana 'n Jayne be comin' back from the party 'n be apparently gettin' up to all manner of things that be not safe fer work.

That be all from the Crow's Nest. Keep an eye out fer the Rover, and have a good night!

Fandom High RPG

About the Game

---       Master Game Index
---       Thinking of Joining?
---       Application Information
---       Existing Character Directory

In-Character Comms

School and Grounds
---       Fandom High School
---       Staff Lounge
---       TA Lounge
---       Student Dorms

Around the Island
---       Fandom Town
---       Fandom Clinic

---       Radio News Recaps
---       Student Newspaper
---       IC Social Media Posts

Off-Island Travel
---       FH Trips

Once Upon a Time...
---       FH Wishverse AU

Out-of-Character Comms

---       Main OOC Comm
---       Plot Development
---       OOC-but-IC Fun


Fandom High is a not-for-profit text-based game/group writing exercise, featuring fictional characters and settings from a variety of creators, used without permission but for entertainment purposes only.